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AIBU?

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Finances

229 replies

Flowerflowering · 16/12/2024 18:51

Just wanted to vent a little and share my story…so, my husband and I have been struggling a lot financially. We don’t have any savings, our living costs keep increasing (our rent is super high) and our salaries are just not cutting it. After payday we’re often left with just enough for food and that often finishes very quickly so some months it can get very difficult and stressful. I sometimes rely on my mum and she often helps when she’s able to, but my husband usually finds it very difficult to ask for help. I’m not expecting him to be demanding hand-outs or something but I would just like him to use his initiative sometimes and ask close family members when we’re really struggling for basic essentials, instead of burying his head in the sand and behaving as though he’s oblivious to the fact that some days we run out of food and the fridge is almost empty. I’d also like to add that he’s got a large family and has some family members that are very well off - I’m not saying that means he should take advantage but I don’t see why he can’t ask them for help when it’s needed? We’ve got very young children as well, which causes additional stress. He’s very matter of fact and blasé about the situation and I don’t know whether this is just him being all “macho” about it and hiding his emotions as men sometimes do…but it’s started to upset me a little. I know there are options such as getting seconds jobs etc but our kids are still young and I wouldn’t want to always be out of the house and exhausted because I’m trying to make extra cash because my kids would ultimately be affected by this…but then again, even if I did, it would probably be for a short while perhaps. Just feeling a bit overwhelmed 🥲

OP posts:
JimHalpertsWife · 16/12/2024 19:04

I think it might help to sit and lay out all income and bills, and people can help with guidance on what could be swapped/dropped etc.

Do you both work full time? Any kids? Any childcare bills?

ShanghaiDiva · 16/12/2024 19:02

Ponderingwindow · 16/12/2024 18:56

The solution to continual financial
shortfalls is not convincing your husband to ask family and friends for handouts. The two of you need to sit down and figure out a way to either lower expenses or decide who is getting a second job.

This.

OneQuaintLemonHare · 16/12/2024 19:01

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Ponderingwindow · 16/12/2024 18:56

The solution to continual financial
shortfalls is not convincing your husband to ask family and friends for handouts. The two of you need to sit down and figure out a way to either lower expenses or decide who is getting a second job.

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