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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not want to go because of this

37 replies

Pinkpar · 16/12/2024 17:13

I started a new job 3 months ago. Work Christmas do is Friday. It’s a 3 course meal, free bar and dj night. Said I’d go but I don’t want to wear a dress and can’t find a jumpsuit I like and I’m quite short and I’m just feeling quite frumpy atm. So it’ll be nice tapered/dressy Zara trousers, sparkly long sleeve top, heeled boots, necklace and jewellery etc and I’ve had my nails done. Probably curl my hair and some makeup. But I heard my colleagues saying they’re wearing dresses and it’s made me not want to go now. Aibu?

OP posts:
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SoNiceToComeHomeTo · 16/12/2024 20:17

A jumpsuit is a dress equivalent. Enjoy your evening!

Foxblue · 16/12/2024 19:30

Just been at a very similar do and there were 3 people there wearing a v similar outfit to what you have described! Sounds great!

edwinbear · 16/12/2024 19:27

Smart trousers and a sparkly top sounds perfect for a Christmas party. Honestly, as long as your clothes are clean and relatively smart and you’ve brushed your hair, nobody will give a second thought as to what specifics you’re wearing.

Floralnomad · 16/12/2024 19:25

Your outfit sounds great , go and enjoy yourself .

NewName24 · 16/12/2024 19:14

Of course YWBU to not go, because a couple of people might be wearing something different from you.

Your outfit sounds lovely.

eastcoasterly · 16/12/2024 19:06

I had a panic about a ladies day last year. Everyone kept talking about their dresses and like you I felt so self conscious and worried and considered not going at all. Ended up finding a nice simple dress I liked and felt okay in. Got there and realised I needn't have worried! Lots of women in black trousers and slightly fancy t-shirts, loads of women in flat shoes, a few in extremely fancy outfits but very few! Also everyone ended up very drunk very quickly so fairly certain most of them couldn't tell you what anyone was wearing anyway. It'll be fine and you will look gorgeous, enjoy the night OP. 🥂

Hesonlyakidharry · 16/12/2024 19:06

Pinkpar · 16/12/2024 17:39

Well I over think and I’m single parent, haven’t been out for a good while, I don’t socialise that often anymore and I’m worrying what people think

Show quote history

I’m a single parent. That has nothing to do with sitting at home fretting over what colleagues are wearing and actually considering missing your Xmas night out because of a pair of trousers. How very very odd.

fashionqueen0123 · 16/12/2024 19:05

Pinkpar · 16/12/2024 17:13

I started a new job 3 months ago. Work Christmas do is Friday. It’s a 3 course meal, free bar and dj night. Said I’d go but I don’t want to wear a dress and can’t find a jumpsuit I like and I’m quite short and I’m just feeling quite frumpy atm. So it’ll be nice tapered/dressy Zara trousers, sparkly long sleeve top, heeled boots, necklace and jewellery etc and I’ve had my nails done. Probably curl my hair and some makeup. But I heard my colleagues saying they’re wearing dresses and it’s made me not want to go now. Aibu?

When you’re sat down no one will notice the difference between a dress and a skirt :) don’t worry

rookiemere · 16/12/2024 18:56

You are overthinking!
If an event is at all dressy, I wear a dress as due to my shape I struggle to get dressy trousers that fit or look good, whereas I suit dresses quite well.

healthybychristmas · 16/12/2024 18:23

I would go and your outfit sounds lovely. Make sure you've got a failsafe way of getting home and don't drink too much! If there is a free bar there might well be some really bad behaviour so make sure you don't take part and don't gossip about it when you're back at work.

anxioussister · 16/12/2024 18:18

catgirl1976 · 16/12/2024 17:18

You are massively over thinking it and your outfit sounds perfectly appropriate

Your second post would make me not want to go but honestly it’s a new job and a good way to get to know the people so go and enjoy and don’t worry about your outfit

Haha me too! Guarantee it’s not going to be very fancy! Wear what you feel comfy in, don’t overthink it

BreatheAndFocus · 16/12/2024 18:07

Eh?? This is 2024! Wear what you want. As long as it’s vaguely the right level of smartness, no-one will care. I wore black trousers to my last work do. Some women had dresses, some skirts and tops, some trousers. If you’d asked afterwards what a certain colleague had worn, I wouldn’t have remembered at all.

ItGhoul · 16/12/2024 18:01

You don't have to wear a dress just because your colleagues are. Your planned outfit sounds just as glam as a dress to me - trousers are absolutely fine.

pikkumyy77 · 16/12/2024 17:56

Pinkpar · 16/12/2024 17:39

Well I over think and I’m single parent, haven’t been out for a good while, I don’t socialise that often anymore and I’m worrying what people think

Show quote history

Seize the day, then!

Happyinarcon · 16/12/2024 17:55

I always wear trousers and something sparkly to these events. I’m just not a dress kind of person. You’ll be fine

Shakey2022 · 16/12/2024 17:55

Your outfit sounds great ☺️ It reminds me of what a colleague wore to our Christmas party a few years ago. She wore black trousers and a black pussybow blouse, both from Zara, with heeled boots and bright red lips. She looked great!

I have worn trouser suits personally to events so I say GO FOR IT ❤️

GrandHighPoohbah · 16/12/2024 17:50

I always wear trousers for an evening out because I don't wear heels. You will look great!

AlertCat · 16/12/2024 17:49

Pinkpar · 16/12/2024 17:39

Well I over think and I’m single parent, haven’t been out for a good while, I don’t socialise that often anymore and I’m worrying what people think

Show quote history

I get this. But what you have described sounds a really nice outfit, I would feel really posh in that, and in all honesty- if you’re comfortable in it you’ll look fantastic in it. Whereas a dress you don’t feel comfortable in will dim your sparkle a bit.

I hope you go, and have a really lovely time.

Needmorelego · 16/12/2024 17:47

I haven't worn a dress since about 2003 (not counting the one I got married in and didn't really like).
Wearing dresses isn't compulsory.
I know several teenage girls who wore suits to their Year 11 prom because they have barely worn dresses in their lives.
Go. Have fun.

goldencabbage · 16/12/2024 17:47

Stormyweatheroutthere · 16/12/2024 17:40

Your outfit sounds fab!! Who wants bare legs in December??

No need to slag off people who do want bare legs

Spondoolies · 16/12/2024 17:46

100% your outfit will be lovely, I always like to wear a dress but that’s because it suits my body shape - I’m usually the odd one out as my friends prefer trousers but I don’t care!

TiramisuQueenoftheFairies · 16/12/2024 17:46

You'll be fine, yur outfit sounds very glam.....
Unlike me when my first boyfrend invited me to his work christmas party: he assured me no one would be "dressed up": So up I turned in my jeans and Snoopy t-shirt (I was a student at the time) to discover they were all dressed to kill. He became my ex early in January...........

minihashbrowns · 16/12/2024 17:43

You'll be fine and deffo overthinking - go!

Justsayit123 · 16/12/2024 17:41

Your outfit sounds fab!

Stormyweatheroutthere · 16/12/2024 17:40

Your outfit sounds fab!! Who wants bare legs in December??