Page 6 | What are your parenting hot takes?

Bornnotbourne · 16/12/2024 19:58

Wholeheartedly agree with you about being friends with your child, if anyone says it to me I assume their child is bad behaved and spoilt. Speaking from experience that the girls who bullied my daughter at primary school had parents who claimed to be best friends with their kids. Their kids wrote disgusting things on WhatsApp about them. One that springs to mind was a girl whose mum did everything calling her a fat pig on their class chat. I screen my daughters messages and was shocked by the level of hatred they for their mums.
my hot take is - Your marriage/partnership breaking down will be horrible for your children, pretending that everything is fine is disingenuous and dishonest, it’s fine for them to be sad and you shouldn’t pretend to be friends as it’s confusing as hell for them and gives them false hope.

sunshineandshowers40 · 16/12/2024 19:54

Pick your battles.

Look after yourself.

Raising kids is hard work but so rewarding.

LostittoBostik · 16/12/2024 19:53

The people who say things like "enjoy every minute" and "making memories" are the ones secretly smacking their kids behind closed doors.

It's normal to find it hard and sometimes utterly miserable.

MaMoosie · 16/12/2024 19:52

You don’t have to like yours kids all the time.

Most parents have a favourite.

Bushmillsbabe · 16/12/2024 19:51

Your child is not you, don't try to mould them into a 'mini me'.

Imagine your child's name on an adult before you give it to them. So many 'cutesy' boys names which will sound absolutely ridiculous on a teenager and a grown man. A child is not an accessory to sound 'cool'

Newsenmum · 16/12/2024 19:51

Shoezembagsforever · 16/12/2024 19:50

TBH putting myself last after 39 years of putting myself first has been the best and most rewarding thing I've ever done.

I would love to hear more about this

LostittoBostik · 16/12/2024 19:51

Newsenmum · 16/12/2024 19:35

Another one is expecting school to be childcare. No. School is their education. You deal with childcare outside of school just like
you have done for the previous 4+ years.

My child started reception recently and I heard mums complaining about the fact that they needed a staggered start (I’m talking literally two mornings before full days) and how it should be illegal and all this crap, even though that’s the best thing for the children. That’s why they do it. All these exhausted kids wetting themselves and not coping but oh no it’s inconvenient. 😳 Yes you will need to use up your annual leave or get a childminder ffs.

The problem isn't the staggered starts, it's that they only tell you about a month beforehand at which point many, many employers simply refuse annual leave as it's too late to book holiday.

Newsenmum · 16/12/2024 19:50

rabbitorhare · 16/12/2024 19:49

Whilst I agree school is education, not childcare, staggered starts in reception are a pain in the butt. As a teacher I'm not able to take holiday, and I'm pretty sure parents would be annoyed if I wasn't there to teach their children. I couldn't send her to nursery and there's no chance I'd be able to get a childminder just for a week. It was a stressful week of juggling and calling on lots of favours, and tbh I probably did have a moan at the inconvenience!

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I get that it’s annoying and don’t mind the odd moan within reason. I think I was sat with some really rude entitled mums 🙈

Shoezembagsforever · 16/12/2024 19:50

TBH putting myself last after 39 years of putting myself first has been the best and most rewarding thing I've ever done.

rabbitorhare · 16/12/2024 19:49

Newsenmum · 16/12/2024 19:35

Another one is expecting school to be childcare. No. School is their education. You deal with childcare outside of school just like
you have done for the previous 4+ years.

My child started reception recently and I heard mums complaining about the fact that they needed a staggered start (I’m talking literally two mornings before full days) and how it should be illegal and all this crap, even though that’s the best thing for the children. That’s why they do it. All these exhausted kids wetting themselves and not coping but oh no it’s inconvenient. 😳 Yes you will need to use up your annual leave or get a childminder ffs.

Whilst I agree school is education, not childcare, staggered starts in reception are a pain in the butt. As a teacher I'm not able to take holiday, and I'm pretty sure parents would be annoyed if I wasn't there to teach their children. I couldn't send her to nursery and there's no chance I'd be able to get a childminder just for a week. It was a stressful week of juggling and calling on lots of favours, and tbh I probably did have a moan at the inconvenience!

thistimelastweek · 16/12/2024 19:46

SouthLondonMum22 · 16/12/2024 19:41

Sleep training is the best thing I did.

Hell yes.

bluebee17 · 16/12/2024 19:45

You can't have it all it's not mentally or physically possible telling yourself otherwise is just foolish. Something or someone is always going to more priority and it should be your kids. They didn't choose you you chose them.

bernadetteo · 16/12/2024 19:45

Mine? You are not, and you shouldn't want to be, your child's best friend.

I have never tried to be their best friend; I have however consciously not made myself the enemy either, so I guess that's my hot take.

Cookiecrumblepie · 16/12/2024 19:45

Not I mean

Cookiecrumblepie · 16/12/2024 19:44

Don't become friends with your children's friends. You are now "part of the crew", you are a parent. I've seen this go wrong so many times and strain parent /child relationships

User37482 · 16/12/2024 19:44

You will probably lock yourself in the bathroom to have a cry at some point.

lionloaf · 16/12/2024 19:43

Having kids isn’t an achievement. Raising them to be good people is.

SouthLondonMum22 · 16/12/2024 19:41

Sleep training is the best thing I did.

thistimelastweek · 16/12/2024 19:41

Children lie and yours will too.
Because they're not reliable witnesses.

CatWolf · 16/12/2024 19:40

mewkins · 16/12/2024 19:36

I've also never heard of this. Is it a tik tok thing? I feel old

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A saucy, likely offensive, off the cuff opinion. Ie ‘Just telling it like it is’.

SouthLondonMum22 · 16/12/2024 19:40

You are allowed a life outside of being a mother. You can have a fulfilling career, you can go on holiday with friends and you can also enjoy hobbies. You’ll be a better mother for it.

mewkins · 16/12/2024 19:36

Jingleberryalltheway · 16/12/2024 19:28

What’s a hot take?

I've also never heard of this. Is it a tik tok thing? I feel old

Newsenmum · 16/12/2024 19:36

rickyrickygrimes · 16/12/2024 19:35

Children change your life, entirely. If you’re doing it right.

Exactly. Do it properly or be childfree. It’s a valid option.

rickyrickygrimes · 16/12/2024 19:35

Children change your life, entirely. If you’re doing it right.

Raindropskeepfallinonmyhead · 16/12/2024 19:35

Don't brag about them.
Dh's friend's wife does this about her two girls who are late teens so l avoid her like the plague now.