What are your parenting hot takes?

Children are their own people with their own likes and ambitions, they are not there for you to live vicariously though because you failed at your own dreams, nor are they billboards to show off how much you love your favourite TV show

Gentle parenting is shit parenting.

Be firm but fair.

Be consistent - always follow through with what you say you are going to do.

Make sure they know they are loved.

Teach your child how to be kind and think of others from when they are tiny.
Don't wait for school for them to learn how to share/ take turns / not to hit etc etc.
If they see you helping others and showing compassion to those in your community, they well mirror that.

Kids learn more from learned behaviours than to do as they are told - use manners with your kids, they will use them.

Defend your child when needed, but don't be afraid to acknowledge when they are in the wrong and make them own up and take responsibility for it - from being tiny.

Many "sleep problems" in school aged kids are caused by parents simply putting them to bed early and them not being tired enough to sleep! Someone I know still insists that her 9 year old goes to bed at 7.30pm then wonders why he's awake at 5am.

Kids don't need endless rounds of extra curricular activities, packed weekends of expensive trips out and holidays every 6 weeks. They need a balance of time playing at home, doing a bit of homework, spending time with friends and family, a couple of extra curriculars that they genuinely want to do and the odd trip out. All this constant activity and stimulation is too much for a lot of kids and gives them unrealistic expectations of life as an adult. They need downtime too.

Many kids are given too much responsibility at an early age and it's borderline neglect.

Kids should not be given screens at an early age then expected to self regulate when many adults are unable to.

Abso-bloody-lutely !!!

Attachment theory is a really important psychological concept that all new parents should understand.

Unfortunately Attachment parenting became associated with baby wearing, co sleeping and breastfeeding in most people's minds but it isn't really about that stuff at all.

Sometimes you have to put your feelings aside, compartmentalise a bit and just crack on with things. It’s sad but true.

I asked the school to add him, they said no. 1 parent per household only unless split parent families. This school are a law unto themselves 😭

Put your children first, enjoy them & let them know that life does not always go your way. Teach them to contribute to society e.g working/earning/help others.

They actually don't only accept 1 number, just have to ask school to add another.
DH and I both have seesaw, classlist, dojo, the maths app that I can't remember the name of etc

The only rules you need are ones that keep them safe and well, and prevent them causing hurt, harm or upset to others. You should be prepared to justify every rule you make on one of those grounds.

Pick your battles.
kids are allowed to have emotions and bad days to.
It's OK to say no.
It's important to teach your kids lifeskills.
Don't give them an out to stay in their comfort zone they need to do the things their nervous and scared of to build confidence and resilience

There really is no need to obsess over routines. Your child is perfectly capable of making their needs known whether that's hunger, boredom, or tiredness. You can be happy, healthy, and well (enough) rested without counting wake windows and forcing your child to go to bed at a certain time.

Breastmilk has many benefits and we should be able to discuss and advocate for it freely. Women should be better supported to breastfeed.

A lot of your child’s bad behaviour is learned from you.

Your kids need to feel loved and safe. It's OK to drop a few balls as long as those 2 things are true every day.

Avoid the class WhatsApp at all costs.

Get DH to register for the 73 school related apps (Parent pay, seesaw, Bug Club, the maths robot one that I can never remember the password for and Teachers2Parents messages) because they all only accept one parent number and if it’s yours, you’re on school duty for the next 7 years. I’m feeling bitter as I had 5 messages in one day last week and it was driving me bonkers!

Drop your standards across the board.
Women who are mothers cannot do it all and you will kill yourself trying. Accept good enough is good enough and out source as much as you can including to the other parent.

Routine. Start day one. It will sink in eventually and make life so much easier.
Recommendations (baby in with you first six months, breastfeed for six months etc) are just recommendations, not law. Do what you think is right.
Trust your instincts. If something feels not right with your baby insist on further investigation. Do not let the GP/nurse think you are just a hysterical mum - better be safe than sorry.
Do not talk about them when they are present as if they don't understand. They do much more than you think.
Be present with your children (put your phone down).
Listen listen listen. Your teenage is trying to tell you something.
Your children are separate people to you. They have different tastes, interests and desires. They may want to become an artist, writer or marine biologist. Do not tell them they need to go to uni, that they must follow this path or that.
And again: listen.

Definitely 😁

The school system whilst primarily is for education fulfils the definition of childcare. Most parents need to work in order to live and provide for their children, so it is disingenuous to suggest that school isn't childcare.

Staggered starts are ridiculous and no, parents shouldn't be expected to suck them up if they quite literally can't. Most children are in full time pre school and so the staggered starts aren't necessary. If you want a society in which school isn't seen as childcare then we need to allow one parent to stay at home or ensure all employers are flexible by default.

There is no non-abusive parenting choice you can make that is as harmful to your kids as obsessing over every parenting choice is.

At least half of small babies that “just need to be constantly entertained!” are actually overstimulated as fuck and need you to stop singing in their face for 5 minutes

Is it really normal to be utterly miserable? I don't think it is. Also I don't think people are smacking their kids because they say 'enjoy' the years with them. That's a very strange assumption.

100% this!!

Also, you do not need to know where your teenage children are every minute of the day. Let them go out, have adventures and be kids.

You can have a perfectly well rounded, happy, well rested, child without following a schedule.

NCT Groups/ante-natal groups, baby books/magazines/podcasts or 'methods' are bullshit and should be avoided.