To call things off because of the way he dresses?

I'm still fond of the 80s smart suit/jacket and tie look. I married (very happily) 2 men who, shall we say, did not embrace my desired aesthetic. At all.

If you really liked and fancied him, his (not terribly out there) look wouldn't matter, as others have rightly said. Do you think that you're put off because it highlights the age difference in some way?

It wouldn't bother me personally but I'm 60 and go for personality.
If you were to meet him dressed like that on tinder etc, would you swipe like?( or whatever it is)
I guess that is your answer, but doyou find him interesting, kind and funny as a person, or would you want to know?
In a nutshell yes I think it's shallow

I see what you did there :D

I think you are likely young. You may look back in years ahead and think, I let a good one get away because of clothes, what an eejit! But if it turns you off I guess that's it.

I once dumped someone because I hated his suit. I wouldn't neccessarily do that now, but if someone can't see that their own clothing is inappropriate ( eg skinny jeans, particularly on an older man) then could you trust their judgement?
Mind you, DH still favours very slim jeans, I'm trying to wean him off them, but it's a slow process. He is actually a decent bloke.
Maybe take new bloke out shopping, if he's nice in other ways?

Not shallow.
That ain't a pretty picture.
The white sports shoes being a real low point. 😁

I’m torn because on the one hand his outfit was dire & I would have the same reaction; on the other if you really connect you could sort his wardrobe out.

But my hunch is that you don’t fancy him as much as you need to.

😆 virile?

I was so attracted to him right up until the point I saw how he was dressed in person.

'In person' made me laugh!

I see you're in Healthcare - as a retired nurse see your point

We see so many men's naked bodies in all their glory that what they wear in 'in person' takes on extra importance. A colleague in scrubs can look great, as can we all as they're flattering, but he needs to look good in mufti!

If he's a nice guy, give him a chance.

You're entitled not to date who you don't want to date for whatever reason. Does it matter if it's shallow or not?

But on the flip side, I'd thank my lucky stars if my potential date ditched me just for the sole reason of not liking the jeans I wear. Saves trouble for the future.

What he wears wouldn't bother me, if the jeans are just slim-fitting and not completely sprayed on. Trainers and boxers - fine. So what if they're ted baker, would adidas be better? Nike? Hoka? New balance? Does it matter so much?

But yea, dump and do both of you a favour.

No you’re not shallow , clothes matter.

If you didn’t already know him and he’d turned up on a first date wearing that outfit, would you have wanted a second?

I’ve gone on dates and what they wear has put me off but style is very important to me. If someone isn’t interested in clothes, we probably won’t be compatible.

I hear you, @revenp . How old is he?

Skinny jeans and knee high boots look good on some women.

I call that a 'Chandler from Friends' shirt.

He's probably not bothered about
His attire and it's something a woman can change over time ... unlike how he us as a person.

I once dumped an inoffensive architect I'd usually met wearing a suit because he showed up for a date wearing one of those beige jackets of the type Kim Jong-Il used to wear. I still remember drinking a martini with dawning horror.

Style changes over time, I wouldn't walk away from a relationship with someone who was a good person, kind, funny, shared interests/values etc, because of the jeans and trainers he wore. If image on a man is important to you, you'll date men who also see aesthetics as important, enjoy that as you age and if you have kids and they destroy your body, how an image focused man might react to that.

So... if you'd met him on an app, and had a first date out of work, you wouldn't have fancied him? There's your answer.

Very true. I know quite a lot of young, objectively attractive men who wear these, but as soon as I see them a switch in my brain shifts and all I can see is my golf loving DFIL. (It's irrelevant either way because I'm decades too old for any of them, so they really wouldn't care about my opinion).

Skinny jeans I might overlook. Skinny jeans with no socks would push me over the edge.

If he's a hospital worker, maybe that's why he wears them?! 😂

@Dotto
I think your predictive text meant virile!

Like this OP?

No I wouldn't say that. Just attractiveness and compatibility means when it's a click you honestly will acquire a lens that doesn't see it.

I think when we like someone but there's something we subconsciously notice we place the reason in a non personal issue. It's not a bad thing better to disconnect before someone gets their feelings hurt.

I hate this style of shirt with the panels. I would never date someone who wore this.

Honestly...I wouldnt go there.
I once got the ick over socks/shoes combo.