Men who quit their jobs to avoid CM payments...

It is true, they have so many powers but there is zero political will for them to be used.

I only worked there a short time but the small victories were good.
i quit after my third telling off for being “too aggressive” with people - that “aggression” was not allowing a man who’d dodged payment for 4 years to have another extension on paying 🙄

Students pay zero (not even yeh £7pw that people on benefits pay) and I believe that people living on a pension or redundancy payout don’t pay either.

There seems to be a lack of shame around this. And it should be considered deeply shameful to be a man who brings children into the world with no thought about their care.

Thing is, the woman is at fault for the existence of the child in the first place, because biology dictates that she's the one who gets pregnant and gives birth, therefore the men are just a hapless victim in it all, 'forced' into this situation by scheming women just after their money and security, they have unprotected sex in good faith, how can they be expected to know that it might result in them fathering a child? It's a well kept secret, and nothing exists to help them protect themselves from this happening, and of course having sex is an absolute must, it's non negotiable and impossible to consider abstinence as an option, I mean the concequences of that to men do not bear thinking about.

Add to that that once a child is conceived the woman is the one who makes the decision to keep it or not and of course men are simply victims of women in all this.

It's been that way since Eve took the first bite of that apple, she was the one who ate some and tricked Adam into eating some, she was too tempted to ignore the serpent and so everything from then on - her fault, women's fault.

Or it could all just be a load of bollocks designed by men in power as far back as you care to go, to excuse their own shitty behaviour and shift it onto someone else and feel vindicated doing so, and it's so engrained that it still happens in today's world, but with a modern set of parameters.

Generally they’re not, but in the case of a large debt and large savings they can be.

in one case I dealt with the charming chap dodged paying for several years, then when he couldn’t dodge any further he quit his job ti live on his savings of many thousands of pounds. A one off lump was taken (as they can do but are often very reluctant to do so).

and any interest from savings counts as non earned income.

Upthread a PP was told savings wernt counted

Income from savings (interest etc) is counted (well should be).

and if there is a large debt then a one of payment can be taken from savings. It takes a massive fight to get it done, but it can be done

And benefits, the RP cannot have savings and benefits.

SAHMs don't fund their children, their husbands do, so what's the difference?

CMS only counts income not savings?! Why is the rule different for deadbeat dads. For anyone else savings get taken into account, including for social care.

Very true and two wrongs don't make a right but he was a tosser in lots of ways, his girls never came first from what he told me.

There seems to be a lack of shame around this. And it should be considered deeply shameful to be a man who brings children into the world with no thought about their care.

A greater pity so many men are so horribly selfish and irresponsible that they have to, and that people like you will still blame women for it.

Presumably he was available for childcare for both children?

Pity women use this as a threat though

I worked with a chap who had 3 girls with 2 women and was on his 3rd girlfriend who was pregnant.
He told me once that he doesn't pay Cm on the occasions when he doesn't see his girls.
I actually shouted at him that they're not pay per view, he didn't get it at all that the money was for the kids benefit. Absolute tosser saw him in a different light after that.

These men are the lowest of the low.

As for the women who support them, some women are just desperate for a man and will do anything and believe anything he says. He will tell her that his maintenance is being used on manicures. He will tell her that he did most of the child care and the housework. He will tell her that his ex partner spent all his money on her clothes.

The new woman never seems to apply any common sense and think those things through.

I woman i used to work with was full time, her husband was only part time which i thought was odd but never mentioned it. Their DD was only part time too (she was about 20 at the time)

One day she slipped up and said that her husband was married before and had 2 kids. (they would have been adults) and he had CSA arrears, and he worked part time for years to pay the absolute minimum for Child Maintenance. She actually said every penny his pays CSA is less money for their daughter.

As soon as the CSA stopped he went full time. I was really shocked and it did make me look at her differently.

Can you imagine a Public Health advert, mum and kids in a grey hostel for Christmas/guy laughing it up in the pub with new Rolex and the clear link to tax evasion with something like "Remember, it's not always immigrants that mean people have to rely on the state".

Should be like the no seatbelt drink and drive ones. Imagine the billions back in the economy!

I also had a friend who was self employed and paying ex through CMS and for him it wasn’t great as it wasn’t very flexible for the times he wasn’t in work due to a medical condition, again I don’t know how this can change.

I am self-employed and there are times when I can’t work or I don’t work or I don’t get paid. There isn’t an option for me to just shrug my shoulders and say sorry kiddo no food clothes heat House transport to School for you this week mummy isn’t working.

It’s just not optional

My friends ex left her with 4 children, claimed he had a bad back and gave up working to go on long term sick pay, he then met new GF, moved in with her, had more children and was a stay at home parent whilst GF worked. My friend never received a penny from him. The current system only works for some, but I don’t know how the system can change for those who don’t get anything. I also had a friend who was self employed and paying ex through CMS and for him it wasn’t great as it wasn’t very flexible for the times he wasn’t in work due to a medical condition, again I don’t know how this can change.

The CMS system is not fit for purpose. Dads who do this are not chased up by the CMS and they don't employ the sanctions within their power. I have a fair few friends in this position. They seem to tactically pursue cases based on what will be a quick win. They accepted nothing less than lies from my husbands ex (she'd split up with her boyfriend and I'm guessing wanted to make up for loss of income). He has his son as close to 50% as you can get. 3 years or tribunals etc to get it returned to the correct amount. In the meantime very aggressive tactics, inventing amounts out of thin air that would drive many people to bankruptcy or suicide. The CMS paid him compensation in the end and both CMS staff involved in the case are 'no longer with the department' meaning they conveniently couldn't do a full investigation into the complain. seems they target the ones who look a soft touch on paper and fail to hold to account the bad dads. Awful system who fails children, Mums and Dads and encourage animosity between parents.

It’ll never ever change until it becomes socially unacceptable not to pay for your child.

My ex dodged payment repeatedly. Eventually (he was military) I spoke to one of his seniors to ask if there was anything they could do. Fortunately for me he had a few superiors who were very very unimpressed by men dodging their responsibilities. As soon as this was made clear to him he started paying. The social, and professional, consequences for him made it worth paying.

Until Dave starts being ostracised by his mates for neglecting his kids, and until Steve is kicked out of the 5 a side team for being a feckless father and until Peter starts finding it impossible to find a new girlfriend because nobody likes guys that abandon their children financially it won’t change.

Until society stops making excuses for their non-payer (so many people find it abhorrent generally, but it’s ok for their brother/son/mate because he has a good reason…) it’ll never change.