To be petrified driving on motorways

I think your thought process was a perfectly reasonable one. Most people don't react as she did and you weren't necessarily to know.

I totally agree! And I was totally stupid thinking I could teach her. I had no idea what this panic about motorways was about.

Some vehicles that can drive/ride on A roads are not legal to drive/ride on motorways

Yes I agree. What was I thinking I could just teach her by going out for a spin! I told her to take lessons with someone specialising in fear. My friend should not be driving until she has overcome her fear.

What annoys me is that you wouldn't get a bunch of men saying they can't/wont drive on the motorway or a certain road and DW has to look after them and sort it out. It reeks of "I'm just a little woman and I can't work out this fancy automobile" and we really need to stop doing that.

Surely speeding, and driving recklessly are the biggest causes of motorway accidents. @Allfur do you have the stats to back that up or is it anecdotal?

@Allfur The stats clearly show motorways are the safest roads. For a start, all the traffic goes in the same direction. A head on collision is far less likely! Many collisions occur when cars push out when merging and drivers already on the motorway cannot move over. Or won’t. A twisty A road with a 60 or 50 limit is more dangerous.

Slow drivers are a nuisance. They might not be in an accident, but they cause them. I often see drivers who cannot judge the width of their car so hold everyone up when there’s ample room to pass a parked car. People who pull out without looking. People who jump red lights. People who change lanes suddenly at roundabouts. Plus other issues. Only one is blatant risk taking but all are causes of accidents. Often nowhere near a motorway. Obviously hazardous overtaking is a risk anywhere. Less so on a motorway as there’s nothing coming the other way!

I said they’re both dangerous. It doesn’t really matter which is more dangerous if they both are. If someone is scared of driving they’re dangerous and are knowingly putting others in danger. Same as reckless drivers.

So what would a learner or a cyclist do? Presumably turn around and go elsewhere - which is exactly what a nervous driver is likely to do as well.

'I find it a bit bizarre that you're expected to be able to magically do this with zero motorway practice after passing your test'

I think that at least two hours of motorway driving should be part of the driving test. Obviously this should be done after you have passed but I still think it should be included.

So you agree, the risk takers are more dangerous, given that there's more of them. Surely speeding, and driving recklessly are the biggest causes of motorway accidents.

I passed my test at 17 but didn't have a car of my own until I was 40.

I was always terrified of motorways. It was the speed and joining in on the slip road that bothered me.

We live quite a way from a motorway but we do have a dual carriageway A Road. I got a job about ten years ago which meant I had to use the A road to get to work or go on a long convoluted route to get to work. I was nervous at first but got used to 'joining in'. This gave me more confidence to drive on motorways.

If the OP can pick a quiet time to practice on the motorway I think that would help. This is what I did before I started the job

I am still nervous on motorways especially in heavy rain. I once visited my son in hospital (on my own) and the weather coming back was horrendous. You hardly see and there were loads of lorries on the motorway.

My DH usually does the motorway driving when we go on holiday etc.

I do struggle on motorways at night and won't drive on them then unless they are fully lit. Actually, I don't like driving in the dark or rain at all unless I am familiar with the area. I think I have night blindness.

Yes! I am now. When I was younger I used to drive huge distances on motorways without batting an eyelid. But chuffing ‘smart’ motorways are terrifying, especially with little one in the back.
People drive like complete dicks, either too slow in the outside lanes or too fast, and cutting in without leaving proper gaps.
I avoid them wherever possible. I always make sure the car maintenance is tip top - service up to date, fully fuelled, tyres in good nick and pressure checked before travelling etc. I actually prefer driving at heavy traffic times, as the speeds are lower.

Yes it is a literal take. If someone says they can't, I'll assume they are unable. Not that they can but don't like to. I don't like to drive on the Coventry ring road but I do and don't avoid it. If someone wants to meet there, it has no effect on me getting there.

But then I absolutely cannot stand the train and would only get one to London but be awaiting the cancellation notification on the way home.

@Catza you're wilfully missing the point.

I guess the motorway becomes a 'not motorway' then, and also if the diversion is so limited I'm guessing the whole road network is going to be pretty snarled up, meaning all the fears people have about motorways will be moot anyway.

Fun times!

I get what you're saying, best of two evils but that's why instructor cars with two controls are best in these situations if someone is so vulnerable that this is a likely outcome. This is not a natural reaction to driving and absolutely suggests someone who is not a competent driver and should probably be getting some help and assistance with solving it.

Saying this type of roadster is not a good driver does not take away from the other dangerous types of driving but we aren't talking about them here. One doesn't remove the risk of the other.

So the only criteria for driving competence in your opinion is being able to drive on a motorway?
In that case, why don't we juts dispose with the rest of the driving test and driving instructions for learners and juts take the buggers down the motorway so the only skills they would need is merging, changing lanes and driving in a straight line. Seems like enough skills to be able to negotiate city driving subsequently 🙄

Learners weren’t even allowed to drive on motorways until 2018 and now only in a dual-control car with a fully-qualified instructor and not your Dad (in the UK)

Then your friend should not ever be in charge of a car again!

The driving license is issued after observing someone on a known route for 20 mins, so just because one has a license, doesn't mean they are a competent driver. You learn to drive after, on a variety of roads/conditions etc. Again the lack of accidents or speeding tickets doesn't mean you are more competent than someone who has gone 35 in a 30 at 6.15 am on a Sunday!

I had no choice as my friend was having a panic attack. I would rather have the fine than be in an accident.

Funny, because I only drove on a motorway twice in the last three years but I clearly can and do drive every day on all other roads with zero issues whatsoever. Not a single speeding ticket, accident or a parking fine. So do you suggest I should send my license (yes, the license which says I can drive) back to DVLA?

They're not. You're also not allowed to pull over on a hard shoulder to swap drivers because one's too scared.

I think people are just having a very literal take on someone saying they can't drive on motorways.

You think they mean they don't have the skills to do so and they can't.

I assume they mean they have all the skills as they have passed the driving test and use all the same skills to do all thier other driving, but they have a bit of a psychological block about the speed/business, or don't have much experience as it's not something they do much as they don't need do. I assume they actually can but are worried about it.

In your way of thinking, then yes you shouldn't be driving if you don't have the skills to merge and drive in a straight line essentially.

In my way of thinking, I know they have the skills but recognise thet might not have had many chances to use them in that scenario, so might feel nervous about it.