To be annoyed at being told to be considerate of disabled people

I am disabled. At the V&A a few weeks ago I went in the disabled loo after a man who'd been changing a toddler and he had left the changing table down and a shitty nappy on it. The taps were thick with foam soap and there was a lot of soap and water on the floor which is dangerous as I have MS.
I think this kind of selfishness from a minority of parents will have given rise to the sign.
It will not change the selfish fuckers behaviour a jot, and will rile decent people like yourself @DefendingPan but it does mean the restaurant can say "I am sorry, we know this is an issue and we do try and stop it - see the sign etc" when people complain.

Don't take bloody ages, don't leave the floor wet through or wipes/nappies all over, don't tuck the emergency cord up out of the way of your grabby toddler and then leave it like that. Only use them if you really have to (I waited ages outside one a few weeks back and the lady inside had no disability at all, she just wanted a wee without a toddler on her lap... I know because her husband who was waiting outside for her told me. She used it because the toddler was in a clingy phase and he didn't fancy holding a shouty yelly toddler for a minute or two. He was embarrassed (good) she wasn't.)

If you really want to be helpful, complain to the company/business/venue that you would far rather have a separate facility than encroach on a space people with disabilities need. You, as a parent, as there are more parents, have a far stronger voice here than disabled people do. You benefit from facilities 'we' fought tooth and nail for, for the few short years you need them.. whereas we need to use them for life.

I wouldn't be at all surprised, though. Unfortunately.

Wow. You obviously aren't disabled or spent and length of time with someone who is. I am both a parent and disabled, it's much fucking easier being a parent. The world is set up for us in so many ways. Being disabled it's actively not.

It means let them go first before you change your baby. Not rocket science

Which is the problem. Baby changing facilities shouldn’t be sited in accessible toilets. They are for those with disabilities. Imagine sitting in a wheelchair, desperate to go to the loo, and your chair won’t fit into the standard cubicles. Sorry, but I don’t understand why motherhood trumps disability in this respect.

YABU OP.

Of course parents should be considerate of disabled people in the disabled loo, even if it's also the only baby change.

Clearly there have been parents being inconsiderate in some way to necessitate a sign - the specifics don't really matter.

If the cap doesn't fit you, then don't wear it.🤷‍♀️

I’d imagine parents have been using them for convenience rather than for nappy changes

I'd assume it's there because some parent has got snotty at someone who "doesn't look disabled" using the loo.

Its a reminder to change your baby, clean up after yourself and put the changing table back up.

Its a reminder that it is not a 'mother and baby' toilet.. change your baby and leave.

It is a reminder that its a disabled facility for disabled customers, not a toilet for you, your 2 toddlers and your nanny.

You can go pee elsewhere, so can your toddler, the disabled people who require that toilet cannot.

Its a reminder that your needs do not trump the people who that toilet was made for.

but who cares about disabled people.. everyone else always uses out toilets for their own convenience and doesn't give a flying fuck about our needs.

You could take the baby elsewhere to do a nappy change but the disabled person has no other option. I would think you were extremely selfish if you refused a disabled person who had gone to the trouble of asking just because you had a leaky nappy to deal with.

You wouldn't let a disabled person use the disabled loo in front of you?! 😮

I think the sign means that parents should give consideration to the needs of disabled people when it comes to that loo. Like, if there's a queue, let the disabled person use it first for example. A nappy change can wait. A disabled person might find it very difficult to wait. I think generally people can be a bit ignorant to the myriad needs of different disabled people.

They huff and puff at disabled people who have the audacity to want to use the disabled facilities. I had it just last weekend.

Unless a bad poonami or wet themselves completely, I do agree

And I assume the only disabled toilet. Person desperate for toilet versus baby who needs changing at some point soon?!

First response nails it as always.

How did this not occur to you, OP?

Dirty nappies left on floor?

It's also annoying that it is aimed at 'mums and dads' specifically. I totally agree with what people are saying upthread about ways to be considerate etc. But sign is badly worded and gives an unwelcoming vibe. There is a better way to say what needs to be said.

You said it’s a disabled toilet and are upset that there is a reminder that it is for the disabled!

It's a vague slightly passive aggressive sign. If they want you to act a specific way they should say so. I would stop going to that place as it seems babies are not very welcome.

Also, why are you annoyed about being asked to be considerate? It's the only loo I can use when out. It's only asking that parents don't take too long.

My children have been potty trained for many years by now, but even I remember that babies don't shit on a strict schedule and are very inconsiderate with this kind of thing. They don't actually care that you changed them half an hour ago or even 2 minutes ago.

I have one loo in my premises, purpose built by the local authority, which is fully accessible and also the baby change - absolutely nothing we can do about it but apart from having to knock occasionally if it's been occupied for a while, we have no issues. Ideally there'd be separate facilities but in smaller places it can't be helped