To be annoyed at being told to be considerate of disabled people

Be tempting to say 'it's ok darling, let's move away from the ignorant woman'

I agree
However
Provision for women is lacking if they are no longer allowed to also use accessible toilets as they are factored into the use calculations

For every urinal in order for male and female provision to be equal you need three wc cubicles for women. That’s just in terms of time needed for use
It doesn’t account for
women with children
women needing to change sanitary products
more women have incontinence issues
women get pregnant and need the toilet more
etc

If we exclude them from their entire allocated provision we are reducing WC availability for them
So I agree morally we have a duty to include all those who are permitted the use of accessible toilets

It's so sad how we all judge each other. Because people abuse the facilities people who are not obviously disabled get stick for using the toilets they need.

I have a male autistic child who doesn't look disabled. I took him in with me to the female toilet for years out of worry I would look like one of these entitled parents. He soils and that very difficult to clean up in a tiny cubicle. He's too old now to enter the female space but I can't let him go to the toilet alone he would act inappropriately/dangerously. I can't leave him while I go as he would just wander off. I'm appreciative of the extra space to clean him up. (I wish the changing tables had higher weight limits!) So we have to use the disabled toilet because of his disability. I have a toddler so the buggy will come in too. I can get such evil looks from people when I take my son to the toilet I hate it

I have a disabled relative too, in particular a teenage niece who is a wheelchair user and severe learning disabilities and so needs assistance to use the toilet and, on occasion, be changed if she has soiled herself. I don’t take her out so much now but pre children I did frequently. My views are not formed from a lack of experience of disability and the challenges being disabled poses. But those are not mutually exclusive to the desire to keep my children safe in busy venues. Again, it’s a balance of needs.

I should have said "only available" baby change.

Ok and as I've just established, in larger establishments and facilities the accessible bathrooms and facilities don't increase proportionately with the capacity of people in the vicinity.

More people=higher number of disabled people in that vicinity too but if the disabled bathroom facilities have only increased from 1 at mcdonalds to 2 in the east wing of a shopping centre there is a higher demand for those disabled facilities by actual disabled people.

A disability accessible bathroom being empty at the time you happen upon it does not mean it isn't in demand. It's in more demand in busier areas because there are more disabled people who will need to use at some point through their stay the very limited resource that is available.

Just use one of the other toilets. Use your able bodied legs to go to another facility that can house you and your kids safely instead of compromising disabled people.

@Sirzy this thread just encapsulates the entitled attitude of so many nowadays. It's really sad.

I know I've been quite 'frustrated' on this thread, and been rapped for it, but I have a close disabled relative and knowing how much their lives are impacted every single day by their disability...I just find it incomprehensible that so many people are so selfish.

Will add this post is actually about accessible toilets anyway. Nobody has a legal right to tell a parent they are less entitled. You might think your need or disability trumps the safety of a child but as a Mother I wouldn’t place my children in a risky situation for fear of a disabled person also needing the loo whilst I’m in there. We don’t go in there for the day. We pee and leave. Its a balance of needs not
one group trumping another and as a consequence demanding they put themselves at risk.

It seems that everyone has the right to use them other than those who actually have disabilities and can’t access any other toilet.

I wouldn’t have an issue using the ladies in a small establishment, I’ve actually outlined that quite clearly in my posts.

Right, but if you and your kids were in the singular disabled toilet in mcdonalds or KFC or whatever, and then I am also in the same facility and I need the bathroom then the supply doesn't outstrip the demand but you won't care that you've just basically put me 4th in the queue because of you and your 2 kids because all you saw was an empty bathroom, although not 1 metre away will you find the door for the ladies.

Its a bit shortsighted to think that a bathroom being empty means it's not in demand. We don't live in bathrooms like trolls live under bridges.

Even in the busiest areas of shopping centres the most I've seen is 2 disabled toilets to one row of women's and one row of mens.

So if 1 disabled toilet in a small establishment like a fast food restaurant is in demand then 2 next to eachother in a busy place that has a capacity of thousands is definitely going to be in demand because there will be more disabled people in that area.

You wouldn't be able to look around the establishment and single me out as a disabled person who has double urgency disabilities and sensory issues that mean I can't use other facilities because my disabilities are hidden, so you couldn't actually gauge the demand by glancing.

Well quite. And adult DC very evidently has a disability. She'd been hammering on the door for several minutes while we finished up in there, and we really weren't in there very long. I don't know what she expected me to do - just leave the loo in the middle of toileting adult DC?

I think it's pointing out that people changing babies should be considerate and not linger.

Its ironic you have insulted me several times yet are trying to suggest I am at fault.

Not if supply outstrips demand.

But everyone who chooses to use the disabled facilities when they don't have a disability IS inserting themselves between someone who may need it.

Then type that then. You cannot just assume that people can read your mind, or will necessarily infer that is what you meant. Here have your eye roll back, it is not warranted.

@SavingTheBestTillLast even if everyone has the legal right to use it, it doesn't give them the moral right does it?

I would never insert myself (or my kids) between a person waiting for the disabled loo and the loo. But if the toilet is vacant I really struggle to understand why a mother making calculated decision to use it in order to keep their children safe is such a crime. I wouldn’t enquire as how disabled a person should be to use an accessible toilet but equally I don’t feel you should have to justify the basis on which you chose to keep your kids safe.

IME at the venues I’m describing there is more toilets than demand. If the venue is much smaller then that would eliminate the need for a parent, like me to use the loo in the circumstances I have described anyway.

Either way, I’m comfortable I’ve made an appropriate and considerate decision each time I’ve done it. My youngest is now 3 - eldest 5. Cannot imagine leaving the 3 year old the otherside of the toilet door in somewhere like the Bullring with a baby in with me. I wouldn’t take eyes off my 5 year old somewhere like that.

You are absolutely right
Money speaks and developers don’t like paying for the spaces

OP, you've said that you were annoyed by the sign, but you haven't said why, so what was it that annoyed you?

Of course it was. The rude twirp could understand that the Ex might punch him. Being not in a wheelchair and not a woman.

This thread is a really sad example of what happens when there is a lack of resources. Lots of people hating on each other, arguing over who has the greatest need, and lacking any empathy.

I’m guessing you mean because it’s too high ?
In which case Thats a really good point.