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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To feel under pressure to get Botox or similar things

158 replies

TheDearReader · 13/12/2024 06:19

Hi, wondering if anyone else feels like me. It seems everyone around me (I’m 30 all friends similar age or older) is having Botox or fillers or expensive facials every month. I live in quite an affluent area and take my toddler to local classes and it seems almost all of the mums have Botox, brow laminations and all sorts done. Now I know this is my own problem but it makes me feel not good enough and like I need to join the crowd and start getting something done but honestly I don’t have the money to do it so I won’t be it just makes me feel a bit old and ugly compared to them. Does anyone else feel a pressure to get Botox or expensive facials every month and it seems that’s what everyone around you is now doing?

OP posts:

WolfFleece · 14/12/2024 20:28

I am quite lucky in that I’m not particularly wrinkly for my age (43). I did have a bit of a meltdown about my 11 lines on my forehead when I was 40, and got Botox once, and I hated it. The guy was a proper doctor with excellent reviews, and it was very expensive, but my face just didn’t look like my face anymore, and not in a good way. I decided then to grow old disgracefully, no regrets.

Alalalala · 14/12/2024 20:09

Breaks my heart a no doubt beautiful 30 year old would feel this pressure.

A spot of Botox between the brows in your fifties, ok. But don’t fuck up your gorgeous face with an overload of unnecessary and trend-led crap now OP.

NoCarbsForMe · 14/12/2024 20:07

PoupeeGonflable · 13/12/2024 06:25

Why would you want to look like a template for a blow-up doll?

Exactly this. Hideous!

Delatron · 14/12/2024 12:09

Oh goodness just seen how old you are!
30 is peak for looking good. Don’t even go there.

Delatron · 14/12/2024 12:00

CookieMonster28 · 13/12/2024 06:47

I'm same age as you. Would never consider fillers but Botox for forehead lines has crossed my mind. There's a 34yr old on Instagram called Bambidoesbeauty who hasn't had any work done and she looks amazing and shares hacks...I've just bought some silicone scar patches to try as apparently they're good for forehead wrinkles! 🤣

You’d hope she looks good at 34!

It gets harder late 40s. However I agree Botox and fillers at that age can be very detectable. Natural will always look better.

I do think those ‘frownies’ are good. You want to train yourself to not frown so much.

ShadowsOfTheDays · 14/12/2024 11:55

Honestly @CandidaAlbicans2 I don't give two shits. I like my eyes better with Botox. I like not having deep marionette lines that my make up sits in.

I honestly couldn't care less about what influences it mate.

CandidaAlbicans2 · 14/12/2024 11:41

@Edingril and @ShadowsOfTheDays you both mention that you've had work done for yourselves and it wasn't from pressure, but the pressure isn't necessarily recognisable. We live in a society where, from an early age, girls' self worth is tightly linked with physical appearance. Little girls are called "pretty" (or not), they watch their mums apply lotions and potions to try and look younger/better. Youth and beauty is revered, ageing is not.

We are bombarded with beauty messages, from an early age, that tell us we are, or are at risk of becoming, ugly, but don't worry the beauty industry has a lotion, serum, cream, injectable, operation, to stop that. These multi billion dollar industries employ the best marketing departments to work on psychological methods to crack us. We think we're immune to the influence but it's obvious most aren't.

ShadowsOfTheDays · 13/12/2024 21:32

My fave posts are 'I don't know anyone who has it'.

Aye ye do!

Cherry8809 · 13/12/2024 21:21

ShadowsOfTheDays · 13/12/2024 08:27

OP uttered the trigger word for the worst kind of sneering you see on MN.

Show quote history

Oh, didn’t she just 😂

I enjoy having a little chuckle reading the “pick me” type comments, and playing buzz word bingo:
”Plastic” ✅
”Blow up doll” ✅
”Frozen” ✅
”Chavvy” ✅
”Fish Pout” ✅
“Fake” ✅
”Duck” ✅

A good practitioner will leave you looking refreshed and rejuvenated, not like a Madame Tussauds exhibit.

TheTecknician · 13/12/2024 20:59

Janice.

To feel under pressure to get Botox or similar things

mindutopia · 13/12/2024 20:38

I’m 44 and honestly, I don’t know a single person who has had Botox, fillers, anything else. 😂 I’m sure somewhere out there, one of them has, but it’s not obvious, they aren’t talking about it, definitely aren’t pressuring anyone.

MumblesParty · 13/12/2024 20:36

When I hear about women in their early 30s and younger getting Botox because of wrinkles, I wonder how they’ll cope when they become middle aged. If they think their face needs fixing at 30, how the hell will they feel at 50?!!

bluebalou · 13/12/2024 18:18

That should say micro needling ha

bluebalou · 13/12/2024 18:18

You could try good old Michelin it's so underrated, the new facial is a glass facial with serum and a tiny bit of Botox like teeny , but it gives a very subtle rested look and glowing skin. No need to go overboard with stretched faces of filler and Botox.

BunnyLake · 13/12/2024 17:40

ShadowsOfTheDays · 13/12/2024 17:39

Me too!

🤞🤞🤞🤞

ShadowsOfTheDays · 13/12/2024 17:39

Me too!

BunnyLake · 13/12/2024 17:38

ShadowsOfTheDays · 13/12/2024 17:37

I was being sarcastic but also a dick. I'm having a very rough day and I apologise.

No problem. Apology accepted 😁

Hope your evening is better than your day.

ShadowsOfTheDays · 13/12/2024 17:37

I was being sarcastic but also a dick. I'm having a very rough day and I apologise.

BunnyLake · 13/12/2024 17:32

ShadowsOfTheDays · 13/12/2024 09:47

It's so cool that you're not like the other girls 👏

Show quote history

I’m not sure if you’re being sarcastic or genuine 😁

But thank you either way. I’ve never been easily peer pressured or suggestible so have been quite happy being the only one in the room not snorting C or getting sh*t faced 👍

ShadowsOfTheDays · 13/12/2024 14:12

Londonrach1 · 13/12/2024 14:03

No. I don't know anyone who ever had anything like that. Surely it's just for silly people on TV as makes you look older quicker

😂

About a million women get Botox in the UK each year, and now about 14% of all Botox is on men

Londonrach1 · 13/12/2024 14:03

No. I don't know anyone who ever had anything like that. Surely it's just for silly people on TV as makes you look older quicker

Typerighter · 13/12/2024 14:01

TheDearReader · 13/12/2024 12:20

my Facebook feed is now absolutely rammed with people getting Botox 🙈🤦🏼‍♀️

Bridges I tell you. My Facebook feed is inundated with videos about tunelling, bridges and bizarrely big waves hitting large container ships accompanied by scary doom filled sea shanties.

I don't really know why. I think 6 months ago I watched a video about a big wave and it spiralled.

TallulahBetty · 13/12/2024 12:44

I see people every day with the mentioned treatments. I feel no pressure whatsoever to get them myself.

MugOfTee · 13/12/2024 12:27

No, I don’t feel the pressure.

Lip fillers and Botox are quite popular where I live, but there’s also lots of women with more natural faces.

I really don’t like the overall look of lip fillers, so would never get them.
I second what someone said earlier, I think enhancements look different on people in photos, the. when I see the person in rl, it’s very obvious what’s been done and sorry, but it rarely looks good. It’s one of the many reasons I’ve never had anything done (I’m 39)