To feel utterly deflated that it’s ‘only 12k a year’ and to ask when is enough?

Choose not to feel deflated by his comment.

You are saving 1kpcm more than the vast majority of people. (I'm lucky if I save a grand a year!) That's an incredibly healthy amount.

Don't decide that his putdown is more valid than your pride in your own achievement. You are in charge of your own opinion on the validity and worth of other people's opinions.

I’d never mention your finances to him again .

This is all about comparisons- if you compare ‘upwards’, you’ll feel bad. But the truth is, you’re doing much better than most people. Be pleased with what you’ve done, and focus on that.

That's amazing!

We still live in rented accommodation, have managed to only save £2000 in total this year. Our dds are 16 and 12.

Everyone's finances are different and you should be really proud of what you have achieved. To him it may only be £12,000 a year but that's a huge amount of financial security for you to have built on your own and in only a year and im guessing better than the majority of family's in this country.

I think you are doing incredibly well. DH and I both work (but I'm only 3.5 days a week) and were managing to put aside about £6/700 a month until August when our mortgage went up by £500, and now we basically live hand to mouth 😣
Your brother was needlessly harsh (and a little out of touch with many people's situation!) IMO.

I'd send him my bank details and say "Thanks for your support, I know £12K a year could do with supplementing" and see what he has to say then.

1k a month is loads, £12k a year, that’s half of lots of people’s salary. Just ignore him, save what you can, if you want to reduce to allow you todo stuff then do it, you and your child have some stability now, you can now have some fun and put your abusive relationship behind you well and truly, making better memories.

Just don’t discuss finances with him ever again

It sounds like you’re doing great. You left an abusive man and you have a mortgage and your financially solvent after everything you’ve been through. You should be feeling very proud of yourself. You have plenty of time to build up more savings

In 2 years you’ve paid off £17k and saved £12? Single parent, paying for childcare I guess? You are doing brilliantly IMHO.
Now is a good time to do more things with DD. You have a safety net if the boiler goes or you need a car repair.

My brother who is usually very supportive turned round and said to me that I had a long way to go before financial security as 1k a month is ‘effectively only 12k a year

So how much has he got, and how much is he saving a year? If he has a partner then halve it. I bet he is nowhere near the same as you.

Balls to him! Saving £1k a month is more than most. We save just over that but that’s with 2 incomes so you’re doing better than me on my own. Well done and keep going! Never mention money to him again.

I’ll never forget my uncle belittling my dad because he was building a brick shed himself (he worked in IT so it wasn’t his natural skill set). Uncle couldn’t understand why it was taking so long and why my parents didn’t just pay someone to do it. They couldn’t bloody afford to. This concept was lost on him.

What on earth?!!! £12k would keep your head above water for a few months. DH and I went for years with no more than that in savings. If you can pay your expenses and save £12k in one year and then step it down to £500 a month you will have £24k after 3 years. That’s way more than most people have!

I think your brother is the problem here not the amount you have saved each month (which is a very, very healthy amount by the way, most people I know would be over the moon to be in a place where they could save that amount each month).

Don’t know why your brother is pissing on your chips, but you’re doing fantastically well to provide for your son, get debt free (other than mortgage) and start to save. £1k or over £500 a month will add up quickly.

You are obviously doing well OP, and are cleary a decent earner to be able to pay a mortgage and save 1k a month as a single parent. Just don't share financial details with family again, your brother clearly isn't a supportive person.

I think a thousand pounds a month is amazing. Try not to let his comment get to you.