AIBU to feel a bit fobbed off by response to complaint?

So how did your mother find out ? You didn't answer the question . I'm guessing she is listed as your next of kin legally , as you're not married ?

I have a mother who seems able to get private medical information repeatedly. She's done it to me when I'm in hospital and she's done it to an aunt phoned their GP and got all sorts of information under the guise of "concerned relative" wasn't even an emergency situation ffs. I used to be furious with staff for giving her the information but then I consider that I heard her on the phone getting info on my aunt and she seems so caring and worried really pulls their emotions makes them think telling her will set her mind at rest and she will use the information to better support the patient herself. you have to be rather cold to hold firm and say not your business I can't tell you that when in the face if it doing so looks cruel to the relative and would disadvantage your patient. I don't think most people expect the person they are talking to to be a raging manipulative narcissist when on the face of it it looks like a concerned relative.

But if everyone was refused information and admittance to bust unless on a list of acceptable people the patient gives there would be more complaints. Particularly in emergency situations where the patient is unable to give the list

So the doctor apologized. For the phone error , then someone whom? Made another error in a& e. Shows what the sorry was worth.
I would want to know
1 what has been done to stop this happening , as current practice not working
2 was there a data breach? That is serious as well
one wonders if the doctor thought he was behaving in an acceptable manner, how many other patients have had info passed on? I love my family , but would not have wanted my private details passed on in this manner.
It is a privacy issue for all not just because you and mother are estranged.
I really would take this further.
i worked for a bank and we would have risked strong disciplinary action for giving an account holders info to Anyone else

A patient's right to confidentiality is a longstanding principle in medicine.

I don’t speak to or see my mother that regularly, so she wouldn’t have been aware of the changes to my health to have known I’d been unwell.

My mother became aware of me being at a&e I believe as one of her close friends happened to be in the waiting room with her husband. I appreciate this is not the fault of the hospital and is just one of those things.

I’m not expecting financial compensation and most definitely not for the Dr to face disciplinary proceedings or for their career to be impacted. I just felt the complaints process didn’t take into account the individual impact of the breach. Given the fact that culturally our relationship is not accepted by certain members of our families, there has been a lot of pressure both ways regarding the pregnancy. If we’d had chance to make a decision ourselves without pressures from family or their knowing, it would’ve been much easier.

I’d have hoped that after the Dr informed me of the initial breach and I expressed how distressed and upset I was, that care would’ve then been taken to ensure my mother was not allowed to simply turn up and sit in my cubicle as I slept.

I appreciate everyone’s thoughts.

You think A&E doctors have the time to meet and greet relatives at reception and escort them down to the bedside of a mildly unwell patient?!

The doctor will have had nothing to do with this part of OP experience. OP mum would have rocked up at reception and told them that her DD was already inside. Receptionist will have pressed button to release doors, OP mum will have wandered in and taken a seat at OP bedside, end of. OP needs to work on boundaries with her mother. A&E are not there to adult for adults who have the mental capacity to do it themselves.

The doctor has admitted their mistake and apologised.

I can see why you feel the response was halfhearted but I’m surprised you got a response at all based on my own experience.

OPs have made excuses about your file not being read properly which does happen and absolutely shouldn’t. That’s how patients get muddled up.

But the doctor knew she wasn’t your NOK and still broke confidentiality and then sat her in your cubicle. To me that seems very much more like the doctor disagreed with you and believed your mother should be given your medical information regardless of your wishes and allowed to sit with you while you slept because the doctor believed that is a mother’s right.

I have been on the receiving end of medical staff talking and acting as if their personal opinions on what family dynamics should be overruled how our adult family interacted. And at the same time fucking up on the medical care.

Retraining won’t change people who believe they are so much better than everyone else that they see nothing wrong in basically meddling in other people’s families.

I don’t speak to or see my mother that regularly, so she wouldn’t have been aware of the changes to my health to have known I’d been unwell.

My mother became aware of me being at a&e I believe as one of her close friends happened to be in the waiting room with her husband. I appreciate this is not the fault of the hospital and is just one of those things.

I’m not expecting financial compensation and most definitely not for the Dr to face disciplinary proceedings or for their career to be impacted. I just felt the complaints process didn’t take into account the individual impact of the breach. Given the fact that culturally our relationship is not accepted by certain members of our families, there has been a lot of pressure both ways regarding the pregnancy. If we’d had chance to make a decision ourselves without pressures from family or their knowing, it would’ve been much easier.

I’d have hoped that after the Dr informed me of the initial breach and I expressed how distressed and upset I was, that care would’ve then been taken to ensure my mother was not allowed to simply turn up and sit in my cubicle as I slept.

I appreciate everyone’s thoughts.

My experience of UK medicine in general and the NHS in particular is that they hide behind 'lessons learned' but real world accountability is never going to be applied by the system.

Report the doctor directly to the GMC under a fitness to practice complaint. It's the only way these cunts learn.

Only because there will be hardly any patients to treat as the vast majority of the population cannot afford private healthcare, even with an insurance model.

Working in the nhs is absolutely diabolical. Private health care will vastly improve working conditions for staff.

If your mother turned up at A/E ... without being notified by staff... they will assume that she was informed by family and asked to attend.
They probably also assumed that she knew the reason you were there.
And depending on how she asked... people can really be manipulative and imply they know what's going on.
I'm sorry she found out... but dragging some poor overworked stressed clinician through meetings and complaints for a simple human error is a bit of overkill.
No wonder NHS is understaffed.

My experience of UK medicine in general and the NHS in particular is that they hide behind 'lessons learned' but real world accountability is never going to be applied by the system.

Report the doctor directly to the GMC under a fitness to practice complaint. It's the only way these cunts learn.

If your mother turned up at A/E ... without being notified by staff... they will assume that she was informed by family and asked to attend.
They probably also assumed that she knew the reason you were there.
And depending on how she asked... people can really be manipulative and imply they know what's going on.
I'm sorry she found out... but dragging some poor overworked stressed clinician through meetings and complaints for a simple human error is a bit of overkill.
No wonder NHS is understaffed.