Secret Santa CF's

The organiser needs to tell the CF that they're disqualified, Why aren't they?

Because secret santa is fun, and you get the surprise element. Obviously hoping it'll be a good surprise of course!

Did you miss the entire first part of my post... how for some people its literally all they have? Those people that are also more likely to be financially disadvantaged from not having shared expenses.

Think of it as being more of a guide price, rather than a ceiling you shouldn’t go above?
A quid or two above or below is fine, spending £8 when you know everyone else is spending c£30 is really not on.
Why not opt out instead?

I think it's good form to be close to the budget

I think its rude to dictate how much someone HAS to spend... the limit is to stop more well off people going over the top.

Some people who do SS have NO ONE else that they get presents from, not everyone has partners, kids, family etc... they could genuinely be exited and want to take part but also not be financially well off (single income, could be one of the lower pay brackets etc...). As long as thought and effort is put in price doesn't matter.

But then someone well off enough to afford £30 on a SS (and insane budget for many by the way, pops up every year as a moan about a budget set by the higher up not considering others aren't as highly paid) is unlikely to understand struggle. I have know people where £30 has been the whole budget for their kid at Christmas. I think many find £8 (and if its in the sale it was WORTH more, so they got a bargain in the budget... good for them) is a perfectly acceptable amount to receive as a gift from a co-worker. Greed is not becoming.

CF is about people who forget, give the laziest most unthought out gift, give deliberately hurtful gifts or inappropriate gift not the poorer members of the team taking part but are living within their means.

Surely just buy her a B&Q voucher for the agreed amount?

Around 15 years ago, DH's family used to do secret santa for £50 which was more than we spent on presents for each other, but in the spirit of joining in, we did (£100 when we had bought 2, which was a lot more 15 years ago when we had a young family!).

I always gave something with receipt in envelope as it's a lot of money to just waste of it doesn't fit it someone doesn't want the item. We never, not once, received items with receipts. One year DH got a beanbag. Another year I got a summer blouse, obv no receipt. It had clearly been bought in the summer sales and then not worn but nothing I would have bought myself. Once I got something I wanted! (I think it was a freebie from work but v nice so I didn't mind they hadn't spent the money). I think we did it for 3 years and gave up.

"To James from your Secret Santa". This was ten years ago. Tucked inside the gift, which had evidently never been opened by James in 2013. Guess how I knew that my SS was James? A pair of raunchy underpants gave me the clue as to the donor's identity.

The last time I took part in secret Santa I got nothing.

@MounjaroOnMyMind unfortunately it was anonymous, and no-one was going to own up after seeing the look of horror on Sue’s face.

It's not anyone being a CF. My son has secret Santa at his work . He is the most junior (by decades) and on just over minimum wage. There's only about 8 or so staff. Last two years he's got the boss/owner so has felt (totally self imposed) obliged to get a proper gift (I think the limit is around £10). He spent £35 this year and at least that last. I told him it wasn't expected but he feels he should! That's more than he's spending on his sister or me (partly because I ask him for something specific I know he can afford).

You’d be over the moon to spend twenty quid on your secret Santa and get Brussels sprouts back?

Hope they were a good date 😂

Aww that is so lovely. I would be delighted it somebody thought to do that for one of my children. It shows even more thought.

i once got a half used bottle of body spray, also got a box of chicken wings the next time 😭

I've given crisps as a secret santa present. I got an entire trade size box from Costco of my colleague's favourite crisps within the budget. It was a pain to wrap but she was delighted. I think I won best secret santa gift giver that day.

I wouldn’t mind a big bag of posh crisps as a Secret Santa present.

Not something I experienced directly, but a friend of mine had the pleasure of a Secret Santa every year in her office, Her boss (of a different culture but who wanted to take part) wrote an email to the Secret Santa group saying something along the lines of "Dear Santa, I don't want the usual rubbish from you and I don't drink. I am doing my house up at the moment so would like....." and then sent a list of tools the unlucky recipient of his name could buy in B&Q. I think that put the kibosh on the idea of Secret Santa presents in her office. I can't remember what the limit of spending was as it's a few years ago now, but whatever it was would have been less than the B&Q tools.

XmasSocks, we're dying to know, what was the pressie?

I worked with some odd people, it's not that far-fetched, if I'm honest.

Amongst friends- someone forgot my present so he just bought a big glass of wine and a packet of crisps from the bar and put a plastic bag over them. A better present than some of the tat I've seen though! Haven't seen anything too bad at work, but ours is tomorrow so I will report back any horrors.

*Owl23 *
Thank you so much. I'm good now, thank you, l've been divorced from him over 20 years now.
He did actually threaten to kill me, and my dogs (I was not having an affair, never have, never would) and repeated it to my mother. She took his side.
I'm on my own now, in my mid 60s, just retired, and it's a struggle sometimes, but l have peace of mind and l'm safe. And living 100 miles away.
Thank you again. x