AIBU to be having nightmares over friends visit?

The social pressure to be anti Jews, probably Hamas, and so forth is immense. Disagreeing makes you a social pariah and ostracized.

This is not true.
Ireland is anti what Israel is doing in Gaza, not anti-Jewish, not pro Hamas.

I think you must have misunderstood the nuances of conversation (most probably in a language that is not your first?) to think what you do.
Or perhaps you want to misunderstand?
I don’t know. Either way you are mistaken in what you say above.

You are right in that you are not aligned with the majority of Irish people’s views if you think Israel has no other choice but to destroy Gaza.

She means the majority are anti IRA

Lots of Irish people really don’t care about a united Ireland at this point, and, as you said, those that do don’t all condone violence to achieve it.

I cannot believe OP tried to defend her statement.

Uhhh yeah. What? Please don't speak for the majority of anyone. Disgusting.

I agree. Your friend is making herself mentally ill, but you can’t help her, and you should not expose yourself and family to her rantings.

It may well be her mental health which is at the root of this but you aren’t responsible for her and you probably can’t help her at this stage. I had to distance myself from a twenty year friendship because her mental ill health started to impact very detrimentally on mine. I’m not Jewish and I couldn’t have someone expressing these views in my house. You can pretend to be ill if it’s easier just now and then I would phase her out.

You see what kind of consequences starting a thread including “a lot” of Irish people are pro IRA has OP?

That's all well and good but not fair to generalise to a lot of Irish people especially as you've said you live in a particular area
And no, I've had a lot of conversations about the North and while some wish Ireland had always been united that doesn't mean they condone the IRA, you can want something but want a different means to it so no, I still disagree and don't want 'a lot of Irish people' to be referred to as IRA supporters

Extremists and racists are not welcome in my home. Plus my main worry whilst I know she is mentally unwell is her spouting bile in front of children who don’t have the full facts and whose brains are developing.

Just cancel her visit and tell her why, lose the friendship over this.

Particularly prevalent before Brexit. People would often say they wanted the foreigners out. Then remember and backtrack 'we didn't mean YOU'.
As regards OP' s problem. I completely understand the agonising over losing such an old friendship. Sadly, I think your 'friend' is showing you who she is. She is no longer the same person. Spending a lot of time apart can mask that slow progress into irreconcilable difference. I don't think many people have the tools to bring people back from where she's gone and you won't be able to manage it in a day. I think in your position I would express my concern and sadness about where she's gone, state that you think her views are not something you can live with/ deal with and you don't want to see her whilst she holds them. No need to tell her that you re Jewish and expose yourself to danger.

Sorry what?!

Again the mass generalisations against Irish people!

Im Irish, lived in Ireland for my entire life and I’ve never once met anyone who is “anti-Jews”. Not once, it’s never been a topic of discussion. The opposite in fact, we spent significant time learning about the Holocaust.

SOME Irish people are pro Palestine and there has always been a significant amount of support for Palestine in Ireland when compared to other countries. But that doesn’t equate to being anti-Jewish.

The kind of people who are both pro Palestine and pro IRA are a MINORITY. And I’m not even sure those people are anti Jewish but I don’t know any of them personally given they are MINORITY.

Ireland has been v good to many immigrants, especially Ukrainians.

I mean, I'm a member of a religion that the state of Missouri had an extermination order against, that wasn't officially rescinded until 1976. I'd look askance at anyone who said that it needs to be brought back (even though it was well before my time, I joined this religion ten years ago and it's not part of my cultural or ethnic heritage.) Anti Semitism is alive and well, unfortunately, and a very real threat to Jewish people all over the world. Anti LDS sentiment is reserved to a few cranks on the internet who are no threat at all (unless maybe they're in the USA and have weapons.)

Still wouldn't be friends with someone glorifying war crimes.

Why is this comment aimed at me? I have not given any opinions on Irish history apart from saying rebel songs were played at discos when I was young and that I don't hear anyone openly discussing how Pro-IRA they are now. All factual statements. Why are you accusing me of being ignorant and having a deluded, romantic version of history?

You have a friend who is in support of the wholesale murder of a group of people that includes you, and you are worried that her mental health might suffer if you disagree with her? I've heard of being "too nice" but this wins all the awards.

I actually think a short, sharp shock might be the most helpful thing anyone could do for the friend, and snap her out of acting like an absolute fucking monster. "Sorry friend, I can't have you to visit. Why don't you just pretend that the Nazis did actually murder all the Jews, and then I would never have existed"

You're easily offended in fairness

@InWithThePlums
I live in Ireland - not Jewish, but I'm an immigrant from Europe.
The social pressure to be anti Jews, probably Hamas, and so forth is immense. Disagreeing makes you a social pariah and ostracized.

I've ended up socialising more with a group of friends who are Russian and Ukrainian because we can talk freely to each other (and none of us think that Israel has any choice given that 97% of Palestinians supports Hamas and the October 7 attack - survey done by an Arab firm 2 days later).

If OP is more integrated in Irish society she would of course be cowed into agreeing with anti Jewish views, any word otherwise would make her a social pariah.

@ChessorBuckaroo what is meant by ignorant southerners ?

Agree with everyone who says to cancel.

Apart from everything else, she sounds extremely sick and unhinged.

Just tell her you have made plans for over Christmas and into the New Year that clash with her visit and unfortunately you cannot meet up.

Then stop all communication, block her on social media and get on with your own life.

I'm more offended by ignorant southerners and their deluded, romantic version of history.

Normally I'd say each to their own, I have friends who are anti-Israel, friends who are communist, friends who are antivax. They respect that I hold certain views and I respect that they hold certain views. We don't agree with each others' views but we can still be friends because everyone's different.

Your mate seems different though in that she takes a sadistic joy in the suffering and death of a specific ethnic group. I wouldn't have someone like that in my life because, if she can be that sadistic about people she doesn't even know, what might she do to me?

Hard no, flush this one OP. She wants to take up space in your house, benefit from the comfort, heating, water and food that you've paid for whilst wishing death on people of your ethnicity? Nah fuck that for a game of soldiers. Big fat nope!

They weren’t carried out by Old IRA though?

@Allinarow48 I'm so sorry for your loss. This person isn't your friend - cancel the visit, cancel the 'friendship' and spend the time with people who love, accept and support you for all of who you are.