AIBU to be having nightmares over friends visit?

Like it or not we wouldn't have a Republic if it wasn't for the old IRA so yes most of the country are proud that they stood up to a big nation and fought for their land and rights. Michael Collins is a hero in West Cork. He was part of the IRA.

It is NOT the majority view in Ireland.

But you have misunderstood I’m afraid.

You said

The social pressure to be anti Jews, probably Hamas, and so forth is immense. Disagreeing makes you a social pariah and ostracized.

and that is simply untrue.

If you believe it you are wrong, sorry.

I am talking about the majority position, so like OP it is probably true within certain small social groupings, but you are misrepresenting Ireland and Irish people as a whole.

I don’t think one has to list all that is wrong in the world to call out a situation as unacceptable either.
That’s ridiculous and clearly just an excuse not to listen.

I think that’s very sad to hear.
I can see how it is hard to disagree with the majority view in Ireland . It does lead to being ostracised.
That might explain why the OP lacks the confidence to be more open in her own views
But that doesn’t explain why this “friend” has views that are so extreme and hateful.

😲 Apologies for the novel!

Again, please stop with the casual racism against Irish people, it’s just unacceptable.

”Scotland is not as virulent as Ireland” in this regard, based on???!!

I’ve been here a long time too, in Dublin, 40 years in fact, never discussed being pro Hamas with anyone. In 40 years.

What I did spend significant amounts of time in secondary school studying was the Holocaust, and discrimination against Jewish people. My primary school teacher also taught us what propaganda meant by using Hilter’s campaign against the Jews as an example.

So perhaps before you rush to paint Ireland as a racist hellish backwater you might consider that your interpretation of your own experience might be just that.

Haven't had a chance to read the whole thread but @Allinarow48 has told us a version of Ireland that I completely recognise. I grew up in Dublin, but one of my parents came from NI, just over the border in a town known as bandit country.

This past summer I was in another border town in NI and there were pro-Palestian posters EVERYWHERE. Every bar, coffee shop and lamppost had stuff on the walls and windows.

There seemed to be a massive level of empathy for the Palestinian people. I surmised (perhaps incorrectly) that the non-Unionist people of Northern Ireland identified with Palestine because we too were invaded amd ruled by another power for 600 years.

Thankfully, reasonable Irish people nowadays recognise that it's time to move on. It was a different time. I clearly remember the Troubles and waiting anxiously for the death count on the radio, but it was a very different time. There is still a shocking amount of support for the IRA in some quarters, and typically when you scratch the surface, it all comes out. A few drinks, a few rebel songs, up the 'Ra.

I am firmly pro Palestinian and anti Israel. However, so are many Jewish people outside of Israel. Too many people confuse anti-Israeli with antisemitic when they are two vastly different things.

@Allinarow48 I think I'd message your friend and calmly explain that you think it would be better to have some distance for a while. Tell her that you are Jewish and anti-Israeli and pro-Palestian but completely anti-violence. You find her politics disturbing and you don't want to be around it.

What your friend does with that information is entirely down to her. The threat of her worsening mental health or self harm has nothing at all to do with you. She's an adult and your obligation is to keep you and your family safe from her extremism.

There are 2 issues at play.

Your friend’s views are very real in terms of what is happening to those poor children in Gaza, while we all have no choice but to standby helpless and watch from a distance.

BUT she has very serious MH issues.

Personally, I wouldn’t want to see her whatever my religious status.

British people have no idea about the troubles

To be fair neither do most southern Irish people, at least in having any form of an accurate view. Many live in blissful ignorance, none worse than Ryan Tubridy. That ignorance extends further back in history too.

And in response to another poster, OP did say "a lot of people" would be pro [insert parliamilitary group], which is not true. A generation on 'both sides' have grown up in a different era without the threat of tit for tat attacks from the opposing parliamilitaries, and as a result no police check points in every town, no police barracks (with spotlights) overlooking towns, no army patrols, no chinooks flying overhead on a daily basis, no bomb alerts in shopping centres etc etc. Today's generation reject violence, and the younger generation, the next leaders, most certainly do.

This is extremist and would absolutely be a deal breaker for me. I would not want someone in my home who has these extreme views. I would just send a message explaining that while she's entitled to her views, at this point it's not a basis where your friendship can flourish and you wish her all the best but it's bye for now. Then block and go no contact.

I’d meet up, just you and her. When the diatribe starts, leave and tell her why, then block.

I personally was shocked that someone who is understandably upset at what her friend is saying, then so casually drops in mass generalisation about another group of people and cannot seem to see the irony.

Irish people have historically experienced very significant discrimination. Casually putting out that Irish people are pro-IRA and anti-Jewish is very harmful.

There is nuance missing in lot of posts another poster pointed out.

I am anti what Israel is currently doing in Gaza. It is, to me as war crime. However so was October 7 and I’d celebrate the death of no one.

I just accidentally pressed yabu, sorry

@Blarn
You can change your vote, just press on yanbu. Not sure about the app, but it works otherwise.

I would 'just' tell her you have Jewish roots and are not comfortable with her anti Jewish posts (as opposed to anti Zionist posts). I expect either you'll get a response doubling down on anti Semitic views and that's the end of the friendship. Or she'll be OMG and 'come to' - ie explain about her second trauma about the genocide and slaughter and maiming of small children has driven her to extreme statements about gassing etc.

That comment was the one that jumped out at me, utterly horrific . I would cut contact with someone who expressed such a foul sentiment.

@Daradarina
I can assure you that I don't misunderstand.
Maybe look at @PurpleThistle7 's post above - and Scotland is not as virulent as Ireland in this regard.

My Ukrainian friend - who knew Jewish people back home (and in fairness is a lot more empathetic than I am) was repeatedly reduced to tears by Irish people's pro Hamas, anti Jewish views.
One time she even shared her nice interactions with Irish people and literally couldn't understand how they can hold such vile views against people who've been bombed for decades.

I've been here a long time and I do understand. Ireland prides itself on championing causes, but it's always against Israel, never are the fates of the Uighur, Ethiopians, Eritreans, North Koreans, Venezuelans, etc etc etc, even worth 0.000001% of the hand wringing because they can't be blamed on the Jews.

Christmas is a busy time, I would be busy. That doesn't sound like a fun way to spend your holiday.

I just accidentally pressed yabu, sorry .

I would sent her a message or call her if you can. Tell her that she can be against what the Irasali government are doing, she can be appalled by what is happening in Palestine and you are as well. But if she is antisemitic then it's better I'd she does not visit as you are Jewish. Leave it at that and then it's up to her what she does next. But I wouldn't want anything to do with someone like that, just as I wouldn't be friends with a racist.

What the IRA have done is horrific and to say that many people support them today in Ireland is horrific. It needs to be called out too as it is untrue.
Posters have commented on her friends comments AND her IRA comments.

I'm Jewish. And I live in Scotland so I'm regularly the only Jewish person people have met. My young daughter has been pushed in the hall, had children yell horrible things in her face - and we had to get the police involved. She's never even been to Israel and is being associated with it just because she's Jewish. I'm anxious all the time. Every single day.

I'd never have that person anywhere around my children as who knows what would trigger her and what could happen. Generations of trauma have made most Jewish people pretty paranoid and unfortunately lately for good reason. The conflation of 'Jewish' and 'Zionist' is nonstop and the difference too subtle for many angry people to understand.

I work at a university so am surrounded by anti Israel sentiment that often drifts into antisemitism chants and such. It's everywhere and I have avoided work often as it's super triggering.

I'm sorry you feel you need to keep this secret but generations of Jewish people would empathise. Just remember that you're Jewish so your children are too and your 'friend' cannot be trusted. If you do meet her to try to help her, stay in public and be careful as she knows where you live.

Not a chance in hell would I be seeing her, she's an absolute horror. And I have to agree that you should tell her that you're Jewish. Fuck hiding who you are for anyone, let alone a racist bigot.