Adult child has to make their bed before going to work

My rule is that beds have to be left airing before going to school /work.
They only get made at weekends or on days off.

Given it takes about 30 seconds, pick your battles.

You live in their house and it's a minor inconvenience.

Easily solved when it isn't your own bed - shut the door and leave it to whoever's room it is.

Honestly, close the door and don’t look at it then! Unless it’s your bed, why do you care?

😂🙄

It’s a bit odd that they tell you how to live in your own bedroom. It’s good to make your bed and I do most of the time but sometimes I’m running late and I’m an adult who will make it when I get home. I have one adult DD still at home and keep her door closed. Then whatever state it is in is nothing to do with me.

A bed that hasn't been made looks disgusting

Might seem silly but it’s a good habit to gain which you will probably be grateful for when you are older.

I have always made my bed up even as a child.

It's good example and part of the routine of getting up.

I moved back in with my parents for a few months in my 20s after a relationship breakdown. They had the same rule - it's not necessarily something I do living on my own, but their house their rules!

If we don't tidy up after meals we run out of dishes, it makes them harder to clean, and we might get insects or rodents. Same goes for garbage bags, if we leave garbage on the floor it's disgusting, hard to clean, may get sick.

If you don't make a bed all that happens is you come back to an unmade bed. No one else even sees it, and on the occasions they do it doesn't impact them in any way.

Do you pay rent?
Does your parents do washing including linen etc?

I think depending on those answers is whether unreasonable or not.

However, I think they shouldn't be in your room so shouldn't be seeing it

I don't really understand why rent would make a difference either way - does money give you the right to make irrational requests of other people who live with you?

I can't abide unmade, rumpled beds. (Airing is ok). It takes no time at all. Unmade beds are a lazy habit in most instances.

I think enforcing the rule on an adult is a bit much but if your parents are putting a roof over your head and you know it matters to them then perhaps it would be respectful to do so.

Silly rule. It's not as if they are spending time in your bedroom whilst you're at work and they feel the unmade bed looks unsightly. It's also better to air your bed/ sheets so leave it unmade. It's fresher that way.

I think airing and making your bed should come automatically, definitely at 24 yo 😉

Yes it's a silly rule BUT it is your parents' way of expressing something that isn't silly at all: either (a) their worries about whether they have helped you enough to master all the basic self-management skills you need in order to thrive; or (b) their fears about still having to be there for you in a supportive parenting role when they had imagined they might have been able to start letting go..

It is TERRIFYING having an adult child and worrying about their well-being. It makes people crazy and it never ends. To some extent, it may be necessary to lean into the project of reassuring them by jumping through a few hoops.

My 4 and 5 year old turn down their own beds and make them tidy before going to school. I dont understand why an adult wouldn't make their space tidy before leaving the house.

I couldn't care less if beds get made or not. They get more air left unmade! I don't think people who want them made are silly though, but I do think insisting on another adult doing it is very controlling. Why does it matter to them if your bed is made or not? I assume they don't intend to use it themselves?

What other rules do you have to live by?

My mum was the same - it was one of many similar things that made me leave home. It just doesn't affect anyone else whether your bed is made. I haven't bothered since my mother made me and it makes no difference to my life.

Are you in fact paying rent?

I presume you pay some rent and therefore I think your bedroom is your private space. Providing you are solely responsible for own your laundry, including bedding and towels, it is nobodys business the 'state' of your bedroom. We all relax in different ways.
I hope they let you live the rest ofyour life on your own terms. But I would be saving like mad to fund my escape!!

Your parents telling you what to do is ridiculous and the rule to make the bed is ridiculous. I'm nearly 50 and never make my bed and I doubt my life is the worse for it. I just don't care.

Context is the key here.

If they're otherwise lovely, don't infringe on your independence and treat you like an autonomous adults who is (presumably) paying rent then making your bed is a minor thing in the grand scheme of it. Although I don't buy the whole "it's their house" argument, it's your home too.

If however the bed-making issue is symptomatic of wider issues around controlling your behaviour and treating you like a child still, then you have bigger problems than a bed.

Bedding needs to be aired, & they should not be in your room.