My husband referred to me as a “bigger girl”

@JacquesHarlow even in the 70s a 14 wasn't considered big. "Outsize" started at 16.

Sounds like you're the one with the sizeism issue.

Quite!

What do you mean it ain't natural? What is it, unnatural??

My partner has said the same to me - I’m a size 10 but 5’11. I think men are just a bit basic in that I’m tall and broad and everything is ‘bigger’ so he just said as such. He and your husband don’t mean anything nasty by it. My feelings were hurt too and it took a few days but then quickly passed - I’m certainly not small!

And I too had no trouble delivering my sons… my Grandmother always said I have child bearing hips! Basically I understand the hurt, but you’d be silly to take it into Christmas with you. Get back to feeling good about yourself and shake it off xxx

He put his foot in it with the wording, however it doesn't sound like he was being intentionally mean.

You are on the bigger side and as a society we're hold making any comment is unacceptable, however, the fact remains you are larger than perhaps a healthy weight. I'm afraid you're the one with the issue, he still loves you and if you're upset by this maybe look into making healthy changes to your lifestyle.

I'm a size 14-16.

I notice on airplanes I generally have to extend the seat belt from the last occupant. On my flight yesterday I noticed that it was only an inch or so from maximum length.

Of course a size 14 is big, particularly if OP was a size 10 before, her DH simply made a factual remark.

Did he just mean that you’re bigger than your super fit gym friends? Yes, it would have been better if he hadn’t started to say it but that’s probably all it was. Rather than calling you big. I’d have the ick at being called a girl more! 😁

14 doesn't seem that big to me. And considering the UK size and weight, it isn't for the norm of the uk population of women either. So when a pp says it was, RabbitsRock, that wasn't in line with the stats of uk women. I doubt the mn population is any different.

It would be tiny for me, I'd be a size 6-8 at 10 stone odd, which looks very slender for 5'7", and a six or less at 9 stone something.

7 stone odd is very underweight for 5'8" by any measure though.

I think this is maybe your insecurities more than his choice of words.
I have child baring hips, big feet etc. Yet I've until recently been an unhealthy low weight. My labour was done in an hour with no pain relief. Someone who carries more weight doesnt have an easier birth, that's nonsense.

Please don't take what he's said as a personal attack.
But maybe address whatever other issues are going on. I suspect there's more to this. Best wishes op

I don't think this is really helping the OP, or any other woman who dares be a 'big' size 14! Positively obese at a size 14, said no one ever.

Sifting shit.

Watch the film 'Trop Belle Pour Toi' also any confident 'bigger girls ' such as the mummy diaries (from The Only Way is Essex) I think she's called Sam? Lots of stretching will help you feel good physically and finally eating slowly and if your into food or perfume or clothes or your time with your children or cooking really own. Oh one last thing, watch the latest Chanel advert. Margot Robbie. Another good film is the one where ? Says to ? 'after I had my son I knew I was beautiful for the first time. U will be fine . Think like a model embrace your actual bodily reality' and also 'act like you're French' /adopt French attitude. They concede beauty to other women while having equal if not more appreciation for their own right to 'claim themselves beautiful because female '.

What’s a sedimentary job? 🤔

Yep he shouldn't have said it.. and OP won't forget.
Like others have said though I'm hoping he meant wide hips for birth.. I'm very slim but a size 12 because I have wide hips and shoulders, and get called a bigger girl. It's not referencing fatness, just that I'm not petite.
But people especially ones we are intimidate with should avoid it and just make us feel attractive

I can understand why, but he was being factual. A size 14-16 is "a bigger girl". You were previously a 10, and now you are bigger. We are under pressure in society to say that 14 isn't big and/or is healthy/curvy rather than being overweight. I'd hazard a guess that most people who are 14 are considered clinically obese. I say all of the above as a size 18-20.

Wow, bitchfest on here. 14 isn't big. He was careless in his use of words. If he is the sort of man who likes slimmer women you are right to be pissed off. It doesn't come over as a compliment.

Can I just say that I know of an Asian lady, who's 5ft tall. Has a much taller hubby and as such, 1st baby was c-section due to large baby. Was a size 10 before marriage, now obese less than 10 yrs later. Regardless of weight, her skeletal structure is still the same. I don't believe weight of the mother is the deciding factor in how babies are born at all....

16 > 10 .

It's called mathematics. And the poor sod had to endure a scolding for that...

Better brush up on basic arithmetics, OP... LOL

Years after we got together (but long before we got married) I once made the mistake of asking my DH what his first impressions of me were. He has never been allowed to live down his answer "Quite pretty but a little bit heavy". For context when we met I was a size 14 (I'm 5'7). After having our DS who is now 7yr I was a size 20 I'm now a size 16. My husband however was 15st when we met and is now close to 22st so he is made to eat his words quite often.

And my sisters are both 5' 2" under 8 stone and super-muscular.

Not skinny.

I'm not teeny tiny. I've always broad and strong.

I was quoting a PP.

I was merely saying that, at my height and weight, I'm strong and solid not the mythical MN gaunt.

5' 8" and 9 stone 10, is a muscular physique. If refined.

It's no way near skinny.

I think the thing to note here is that your husband very quickly realised he had hurt you & did not continue with his comments. He could have been dismissive or blind to your hurt.
However, it still hurt you.
Is your relationship in a place where you could discuss your feelings about this issue?
How do you feel about your weight gain over the years?
Are you happy with your body shape or would you like make some changes?
If there are other issues at play try to talk to your husband and see if he is willing to address the problems.
Working & caring for young children can be draining, resulting in couples drifting.
I hope you can work things out together.

I'd imagine that's exactly what he meant

I’m five 7 and at a 14-16 was four stone over weight and clinically obese.