Friend can never be happy for my child

Yet this woman appears not to be turning her back on the OP at all. She’s just not giving the OP’s daughter the praise the OP (not her DD) appears to crave.

At least she's not being fake and congratulating you/DD through gritted teeth, which I imagine some other parents are.

Same here, I was just commenting that I understood the OP's point of view. 🙂

Again, not answering the question. Sure, it would be nice. However, it’s not important and it makes no difference, either way. So, why do you care?

I get it OP. She's being rude and petty, can't even acknowledge a child's achievement because it wasn't HER child. So lame.
Just keep staying out of it and not engaging and yes, sit somewhere else during the next concert. She isn't wishing you well at all.

'Friends' lol.

My DC are adults now but you've brought me right back to remembering 2 mums who sound just like you and your 'friend'.

Both obsessed with their kid's achievements, both obsessed with going into competition with each other, both in complete denial that they're just as bad as each other.

Meanwhile, the kids just kept their heads down and got on with doing the sports/hobbies THEY enjoyed.

Who cares who/how many compliment your child's achievements.

They're not YOUR achievements!

My DD had some pretty amazing achievements and some people commented and some didn't. I didn't care because none of it was about me

Some people on this thread really don't get it.

Still unless you've had a dc who unexpectedly shows a facility for a certain activity that goes way beyond the average, I suppose you won't understand what it's like to have 'friends' who start to turn their backs on you.

No, it is not. It does not answer the question we’ve been asking, which is why people keep asking it.

Being friends for years does not explain why you are so focused on receiving validation from this person.

Secondary to that is the fact that it doesn’t sound like much of a friendship. However, even if she was your absolute BFF, your fixation would be odd. So, please explain it to us.

I have a couple who are good friends but since they had a child all I hear about is her achievements - in particular her sporting ones. I actually worry that how hard they are pushing her is going to damage her, and all her self worth is going to come from her achievements. It makes me pretty sad. It's also incredibly boring and self indulging. The only way I can deal with it and maintain the friendship is to completely ignore all references, unless she is there and then I congratulate her. My children are much much younger and so I'm not jealous or insecure or any of those things. I just find it utterly insufferable.

I know they would say they don't show off about it. Maybe they honestly believe that. And I suspect they wonder why I don't engage.

By ‘friend’ do you mean ‘someone I literally have nothing good to say about’?

Not really answering my question though
You should be happy and proud of/for your DD without needing this validation

You may just have to accept she doesn't have it in her to be happy for or interested in your daughter.

Just because you have been friends for a long time doesn't mean you have to carry on being friends if the friendship isn't making you happy.

you can't make her give a shit about your child but you don't have to keep her in your life if her inability to say a single nice word upsets you.

OP, your entire thread is one massive boast and you don’t seem to recognise that. It makes me wonder if you do this in real life. Of course you say you don’t - and maybe you don’t - but maybe you do?

Why do you need validation from this one friend? It seems to be bothering you. Let the friendship go if that’s important to you.

are the girls friends? If their friendship is important, then let it be.

She cannot provide a rational response to that question. Possibly because there isn’t one.

Literally nothing you have said about her suggests you have any warm feelings towards her whatsoever. You describe her as having been previously very competitive about the relative achievements of your daughters when hers was always coming out on top, and now you describe her as mean-spirited and jealous.

Is it possible she might not consider your dd's sporting achievement / being selected for things at school as an 'achievement'?

I'm from an Indian background and I'd get laughed out of the room if I ever tried to boast about my kids competing in gymnastics / performing in school productions because the 'value add' is in sports like tennis / cricket / rugby or performing in local theatre groups /orchestras.

I ask again WHY is it to important to you that you get approval from this one person?

This is why you need to stay away from social media and engage with her via talking. Social media isn't the be all and end all. What's up drives me nuts esp school ones. It's like you are expected to respond to everything which I why I don't use it