DP just called DD ungrateful - I’m fuming!

Just read your updates. I hope everything is sorted soon.

I took that as the poster being sarcastic which isn't helpful either.

I would be angry with your DP.

YADNBU

Read through all of your updates.

You’ve split up with him, he doesn’t pay towards the household, he needs to leave. He can go to wherever he lives before or go and bum off someone else 🤷‍♀️

Essentially it’s not your problem nor is it your responsibility to house someone who doesn’t pay their way.

Best of luck OP. Please update us.

Do you have any burly male friends or relatives?

Would your ex help give him the boot based on the fact it’s effecting your daughter?

“…he struggles with apologies.”

🚩🚩🚩🚩

He needs to work on this. This isn’t great.

Well done you! I’m pleased that she she hear you advocating for her 💪🏻

He sounds like a massive tw@t and should be apologising to both of you.

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

you feeling okay?

Does his daughter have her own room? If she does you tell him once again it’s definitely over put all his stuff in that room he can sleep there. Also stop cooking cleaning and washing for him and tell him he owes half the rent and half the bills. If he doesn’t give you that immediately he needs to leave by Friday.

So he doesn't want to leave? Quelle surprise! Definitely hide and lock away all your valuables and important documents, and move his things into the room used by his poor DD. Put his stuff in bin bags thus making it easier for him to leave!

And as said before, change the wifi password, netflix etc passwords, and lock up the nice food, wine etc leaving only staples in the cupboard. A lock on your bedroom door might be a good idea, you can get ones in a door handle set so you only need to change the exisiting door handle, no need for drilling etc.

Good luck! You shouldn't have to be moving out of your home of nearly seven years just because you made a mistake and let him in and put him on the tenancy list. Hope your landlord knows all the legal steps they can help you with, but maybe get professional advice, you can get a free 30 min consultation from most solicitors.

I just told my landlord exh had left and could I have a new single tenancy.. She didn't even speak to the twat and sent a new one the same day. Pretend he has already gone. No laundry or cooking.. Go to bed first and shove some drawers against the door.

OP he's clearly shitting himself because he knows he's going to have to take responsibility for his own life and he won't have you to sponge off any more. Men like this don't change. Stay strong and get him out.

Everyone saying she can't throw him out because he's on the tenancy there's a 14 year old there who he is not related to so if he caused any aggro over being thrown out i can't see any police officer forcing op to take him in.

I would look for a new home. Painful as it is, it will probably be less work than getting him out. With any luck he'll take it seriously and jump before he's left behind and liable for the bills. You can have a quiet word with your landlord but also have a plan B ready.

How much notice do you have to give? I'd do that and get ready to remove your possessions before he makes off with a bunch of stuff that doesn't belong to him.

What? Have you read the thread, or at least OP's posts?

if he wont go then you will have to give notice. If you know the LL then perhaps he could give you notice and then XDP will move out and you can stay put?

Get advice from Shelter though.

Whether together or not, if he is staying around for the moment, then he needs to be paying half of the rent and all bills. He needs to buy his own food and do his own chores , cooking and laundry.

you have to make it very clear to him that it is over. Hopefully he will move out. Tell him that he needs to remove himself from the Tenancy or he will be liable for half the rent whether he lives there or not.

This. A relationship is done when one person says it is. It doesn’t need mutual agreement. His opinion doesn’t matter if you’re done.

Which bed is he sleeping in tonight OP? Good luck in getting the offensive cock lodging shit out of your home, I hope he goes quickly.

Be careful OP, my sister had one of these "I'll do anything, I don't want to lose you types". What it boiled down to was he liked living off her coattails and the lifestyle SHE gave him as he was a lazy waste of space that didn't pay his way.

You need to make it clear that from your point of view it is finished. You are no longer attracted to him and that he should have some pride and accept it’s over.

Just read all your replies!! please don’t listen to his begging and false promises, he’s shown you who he is already so listen to that 🤷🏼‍♀️

Stick to your guns for your daughters sake as well as this man sounds like a freeloading knobjockey 😳

hopefully the landlord can organise something for you as that is your home!

Why are you together?

Wow, what an insight 🙄

Based on what?

This is horrendous for you and your daughter, I’m so sorry. I think I too would move all his clothes etc in to his daughter’s room and say he’s to sleep there. Tell him you’ve approached the landlord and you have agreed to revert back to single tenancy (doesn’t matter this hasn’t been discussed as I doubt he would ring them to check). Tell him that will come into effect the next rental month so his stuff needs to be moved out by then but you assume he will go elsewhere before then.
good luck

While you're waiting to hear from landlord can you at least move all his stuff into the room his DC uses when they visit and give him something in writing to the effect that you realise that when you were in a relationship you subsidised him to the tune of £xxxx but that now you consider the relationship to be irretrievably broken down you will need £xxx pw until he removes himself from the property. And yes to removing all home comforts, no laundry, cleaning, cooking, he's no longer a cocklodger he's a lodger who needs to go.