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Original poster

DP just called DD ungrateful - I’m fuming!

659 replies

Rosettespur · 08/12/2024 17:03

DP and I not on great terms at the moment.

DD is 14 (not his). We live together.

I was in the kitchen folding washing with DD and she mentioned her pj bottoms had faded abit, not in a rude way, just generally.

’D’P then loudly said from the other room ‘so ungrateful’!

I went in and asked who he was talking to, apparently it was DD, he could see my reaction so tried to laugh it off.

DD and I went upstairs for a while, came back down and he wanted me to apologise for ‘over reacting’ to the comment. Adding that he is sick of ‘emotional women’ in the house. He then made some shity comments about ‘don’t even ask me to apologise or I’ll actually laugh’

Suddenly have massive ick and he is sulking

OP posts:
Tubetrain · 08/12/2024 17:39

Rosettespur · 08/12/2024 17:25

Been together 4 years, moved in about 18 months ago

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How much notice are you going to give him to leave? Let me guess - not paying rent?

CalmDuck · 08/12/2024 17:39

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SugarandSpiceandAllThingsNaice · 08/12/2024 17:38

Rosettespur · 08/12/2024 17:33

I’m not speaking to him when he is sulking, would definitely not be asking for an apology. Although I have noticed he struggles with apology’s!

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Sigh, this is a wild guess but adults raised by parents who never apologised often struggle with apologising, especially to children. It is something that can be worked on, but growing up with poor role models can mean difficulty breaking free into better habits.

Msmoonpie · 08/12/2024 17:38

I’d tell him I’m sick over overly emotional men personally .

CalmDuck · 08/12/2024 17:38

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LivinInYourBigGlassHouseWithAView · 08/12/2024 17:37

Ew.

Just, ew.

You deserve better and your daughter deserves a better male role model in her own home.

Original poster
Rosettespur · 08/12/2024 17:34

AuContraire · 08/12/2024 17:32

Whose laundry were you both folding?

General all laundry, DD said something like, ‘these have gone a funny colour, I think they are faded from being washed’ - they are not new, he doesn’t buy her clothes, he hadn’t washed her clothes, he had absolutely no role in any of it, his comments were not necessary!

OP posts:
Original poster
Rosettespur · 08/12/2024 17:33

SugarandSpiceandAllThingsNaice · 08/12/2024 17:30

I’d wait and see if he apologises of his own accord later. Forcing a “sorry I offended you with my joke” isn’t going to be genuine. If he doesn’t apologise on his own accord, then you know he’s a twat.

I’m not speaking to him when he is sulking, would definitely not be asking for an apology. Although I have noticed he struggles with apology’s!

OP posts:
AuContraire · 08/12/2024 17:32

Whose laundry were you both folding?

SalsaLights · 08/12/2024 17:31

What a dick.

Sounds like someone needs a major attitude adjustment. And possibly somewhere else to live.

Original poster
Rosettespur · 08/12/2024 17:31

TallNeckedGiraffe · 08/12/2024 17:26

What does your daughter think of him?

She really doesn’t care for him tbh. They seem to get on, she is always polite to him but they tend to rub along really

OP posts:
Over40Overdating · 08/12/2024 17:31

Men like this always show their true colours because their audacity outweighs their intelligence by a metric ton.

It always starts with sly digs, pass it off as banter, when you don’t find it funny, you are too emotional, so is your DD, don’t ask him to apologise when you are at fault.

Thankfully it has backfired in the twat’s face this time round. You’ve shown your daughter she deserves not to be treated badly in her own home. Lean into the ick and start the new year 13 odd stone lighter.

SugarandSpiceandAllThingsNaice · 08/12/2024 17:30

I’d wait and see if he apologises of his own accord later. Forcing a “sorry I offended you with my joke” isn’t going to be genuine. If he doesn’t apologise on his own accord, then you know he’s a twat.

RaspberryBeretxx · 08/12/2024 17:30

MiddleParking · 08/12/2024 17:04

Could be worse, could be no man at all.

Worse?? Or… better 🤔?

eta just saw your next post. Agree, seems like a good point to reconsider living arrangements.

pikkumyy77 · 08/12/2024 17:28

Did he not know he was planning to live with women? Did he not know he would have to be pleasant and considerate of the two women he was proposing to sponge off of? Why the irritation at having to deal with (ugh) women and their (ugh) opinions? Yes: he has to apologize. No:this should not be negotiable or some kind of surprise change in the rules.

OlderGlaswegianLivingInDevon · 08/12/2024 17:28

Does he pay for your daughter's clothes ?

I thought by being faded she meant they were getting old, not that it had anything to do with the laundry.

So it feels as if she needs more pj's - does he think he has to pay for these, does he resent her having clothes.

WTAFisthisnonsense · 08/12/2024 17:28

How grateful is he, living in your house?

SugarandSpiceandAllThingsNaice · 08/12/2024 17:28

Rosettespur · 08/12/2024 17:24

Kinda why I posted because it could have been badly timed but no apology? And to almost continue it suggesting I needed to apologise for overreacting? When I didn’t raise my voice or anything, merely clarified I had heard correctly

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Give it a bit. When he said tired of emotional women he was likely projecting his being emotional over being corrected. Some people do a flounce like that because they get defensive when pulled up, but later come back with a genuine apology. The ‘just joking’ is a defence. I agree if he never apologises and always thinks he is right, you have a massive problem and he really shouldn’t have moved in.

Sia8899 · 08/12/2024 17:28

The first bit would annoy me but the “emotional women” joke would have me rethinking things. He sounds straight out of the 1950s

Hunglikeapolevaulter · 08/12/2024 17:28

OP you're seeing his true colours. A stupid comment with an apology is one thing but he's doubled down.

MyPithyPoster · 08/12/2024 17:27

Hmmmm I guess now you will be on your guard for any more comments when actually it should be him walking on eggshells cause he’s fucked up

Stormyweatheroutthere · 08/12/2024 17:27

And it starts. Small digs.. Which become bigger. Ime.

Fraaahnces · 08/12/2024 17:27

No man at all sounds appealing right now, probably.

TallNeckedGiraffe · 08/12/2024 17:26

What does your daughter think of him?

Original poster
Rosettespur · 08/12/2024 17:26

DidILeaveTheGasOn · 08/12/2024 17:24

Does he think she needs to be grateful for having clothes? What a guy.

Fuck knows, but it’s put my back up and his further responses have really given me the ick

OP posts: