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AIBU?

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Original poster

to be too exhausted by training contract to have sex

134 replies

HildegardVonBingham · 07/12/2024 15:29

Hi all

I've just started my training contract at a city firm. The firm are inexplicably making us do the SQE (famously hard exams - c.44% pass) alongside the training contract. We get a day off once a week, but realistically you have to do extra work before or after work or at the weekends.

I'm not really enjoying the work - it is a steep learning curve - and studying alongside it feels relentless. As a result I am often too tired to have sex. I would say we do it about once a week, and DP and I had a massive barney about it this morning. DP tried to initiate sex several times this week and I didn't want to because I'd had an awful week at work and massively cocked something up. DP feels unloved and rejected because I don't want to have sex, and I shouted that I feel that all I do is work, study, and go to the fucking shops of do fucking washing up. I just think it's really selfish to not understand that when I'm tired and have had a shit week the last thing I want is to have sex. DP's job is quite relaxed, and this makes me feel extra martyrly and irritable.

AIBU!!!!

OP posts:
PeloMom · 07/12/2024 16:10

@YellowSwanFrom im glad I’m not the only one!
OP instead of supporting you (helping around to lessen your load, being understanding) he is creating another ‘chore’ for you. YANBU

Huonneyywisshful · 07/12/2024 16:09

PrincessofWells · 07/12/2024 16:04

You chose a training contract at a city firm, that's exactly what it's like, and you risk burnout going forward from here.

Are you being unreasonable- it's what your partner thinks that's relevant surely, but sex is a good way to wind down.

Ignore this utter bollocks @HildegardVonBingham

Any person having a mardy because their partner refuses sex, because they are exhausted, is an absolute twat.

He’s a sex pest, he’s unreasonable you are not unreasonable.

Good luck with your studies.

Zippidydoodah · 07/12/2024 16:08

PrincessofWells · 07/12/2024 16:04

You chose a training contract at a city firm, that's exactly what it's like, and you risk burnout going forward from here.

Are you being unreasonable- it's what your partner thinks that's relevant surely, but sex is a good way to wind down.

Fucking hell! Of course she’s not being unreasonable not wanting to have sex because she’s tired and stressed and just doesn’t feel like it!! 🙄😡

WasThatACorner · 07/12/2024 16:08

PrincessofWells · 07/12/2024 16:04

You chose a training contract at a city firm, that's exactly what it's like, and you risk burnout going forward from here.

Are you being unreasonable- it's what your partner thinks that's relevant surely, but sex is a good way to wind down.

Sex is a great way to wind down, with someone who is supportive and pulling their weight.

Not so much with someone who is chilled waiting for you to do the shopping and chores.

YellowSwanFrom · 07/12/2024 16:07

So, I thought it was in your work contract to have sex and you were exhausted by it.

WasThatACorner · 07/12/2024 16:06

YANBU you're under massive strain and he is showing you who he is, believe him.

PrincessofWells · 07/12/2024 16:04

You chose a training contract at a city firm, that's exactly what it's like, and you risk burnout going forward from here.

Are you being unreasonable- it's what your partner thinks that's relevant surely, but sex is a good way to wind down.

DontBiteTheCat · 07/12/2024 16:02

You are definitely not being unreasonable!

Original poster
HildegardVonBingham · 07/12/2024 16:00

.... ladies..... I need to know if IABU or not...!!!!

OP posts:
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