Passengers sigh when they remove bag off neighbouring seat on PT

Years of travelling in central London - you learn to be assertive and not care.

I have mobility issues and need to sit.

lots of our trains are 3 seats facing 3 seats configuration and so very often you get on and there are people in the end seats with their bags / coats on the middle seat with the inevitable man spread too and a clear message of ‘no room here .

I loudly and politely say ‘excuse me please’ with a massive smile -
they invariably tut / sigh etc and begrudgingly move there stuff and I sit down…

i don’t care what they think or how much they tut etc… my bum needs that seat more than their coat / bag!

don’t be intimidated by others - be polite but firm and clear - kill them with kindness as you thank them!

You wouldn't need to ask me to move my bag, I'd move it first. But if a little sigh escapes because you've picked me when there's lots of seats ...I simply don't care if you find it rude. As I said, British people seem to spend their lives declaring everything to be rude. It's not my issue, it's yours.

I'm not saying they're the same levels of rude. I agree "fuck off" is MORE rude. I'm saying it's the same thing in the sense that you're being rude to someone (in your case, sighing) and your defence is that it is fine to be rude, as long as you are doing the thing you have been asked (i.e. moving your bag).

You surely accept that there's a level of rudeness (i.e. saying fuck off) that would be unacceptable. We clearly disagree on where the line is.

If you're not British, perhaps it's a cultural difference? Like in the same way different hand gestures are seen as rude in different places and there's different expectations of volume, personal space etc.

I don't know anyone who would not think it rude to openly sigh at someone who has politely asked them something reasonable. You might think it 'tiresome' but what you're describing is going to be perceived as rude by most people.

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I am an equal opportunity bag requester but I ask the person I think I’d prefer to have to sit next to whoever that happens to be, more often that happens to be a woman but not always.

as for the manspreading, I have started spreading too (if I need to) but I lineup exactly my allotted space so when a man is sitting next to me they either have to shift over or have me pushing against them with side of my knee (almost always they move and if they say something i politely say you are in my seat space and I’m not moving) and if I am there first they automatically only spread to the millimetre they can without actually touching me.
Men spreading does my nut in!

YABU to care whether or not they sigh, so long as they do it.

@FiveFoxes

I hope you don't mind me asking, but why can't you ask?

I don't mind you asking but at the same time it isn’t really relevant, if I can't ask I can't ask.

Most people will move their bag if you are hovering next to the seat and the train is busy.

That's isn't the usual experience at all, or we would have threads like this full of people saying the opposite.

I had a driver in London shouting at me to move down the bus but there was a man stood by the luggage rack meaning I would have to squeeze past him and make contact. I ain't doing that for anyone so I stood quite frozen to the spot.

Someone sighed at me and reluctantly moved their bag on a train once, I very exaggeratedly said ‘Oh, thank you, you’re soooo kind’

They went a bit red - it was satisfying.

Of course it's not the same thing, could you BE any more dramatic?

British people need to stop obsessing over literally every thing being rude. You're so tiresome.

I hate when people won’t move down the bus, even when the driver tells them too.
So there a seats at back of bus but they prefer to stand in the way!
Plus you should be aware of your surroundings and once bus/ train starts to get full move your belongings.
Mind on the buses around here, there is no room for any bags and no storage space anymore.

You think it's fine to sigh at people while moving your bag. Genuine question would you think it's fine to say "fuck you" while moving your bag?

If not why? It's the same thing. Expelling air from your mouth in a way that is widely accepted as rude.

Sighing is rude. Sighing at someone and rolling your eyes - they are nonverbal but they are still communication with a clear meaning. It's really no different in practice to saying "fuck you" at them.

It’s rude to sigh. It’s rude to have anything on any seat apart from your bottom. No one should have to ask. I could of course ask, but why should I have to? The sitter already has a seat - it’s entitled to expect someone to have to ask when it’s clear people are going to want seats (which they are fully aware of - they are relying on people not asking).

Also occupiers of outside seats. Absolutely fine to have this preference, but stand up when others want to get to the window seat. I’ve often accidentally stepped on toes trying to get in (now that does allow for a sigh!)

Your luggage and bags are for the floor and other designated area, seats are for people. This is my view, and I wasn’t being rude. Calm down.

On the train into work earlier this week. Only a few seats left when I got on, so I asked the person in the window seat to move her bag so I could sit down. She kind of jiggled it on the seat a bit, but didn't actually pick it up! So I sat on it. At which point she huffed really loudly, retrieved the bag, and then moaned about me into her phone for the rest of the journey.

You mean acting entitled. No need for it at all.

We can't be sure where you've put your arse before, but you're putting that on a seat 🤷‍♀️

You do realise that there are places for your bags elsewhere in the carriage and you have no business blocking seats with your stuff. It’s so selfish.

It’s a sport. Always ask the person who will be most irritated by being asked to take their bag off the seat. Obvs only if there are not enough free seats.
if they sigh then kill them with a bright and breezy smile!

If I were quick enough (I'm not!) I think I'd ask "How much does a ticket cost for a bag these days"? 😊

Or a guaranteed chance for them to reply "yes".

You're hardly in a position to ask them to prove it. Very annoying though, I agree OP.

I reach for the bag to take it off the seat if they don't move it first. Then it gets moved very quickly.

Dd 18 can't stand on a moving bus she's has balance problems so will always grab the first seat avaliable.
One day she was around 15 and a rather rude woman told her to move because she was in a priority seat.
She got up bus starts moving dd falls a splits her head open.

it still amazes me that there are people in the world that give headspace to things like this. Why on earth would you care if a stranger sighs at you?

Why are they ‘some fucker?’ Why should they sit next to someone else rather than you? People nearly always sit in an empty pair of seats if any are available.