Do you teach your child to hit back?

Aye. If anyone disbelieves us, they just need to do a quick Google. The bullies are now prearranging the beatings that they give and are organising for their friends to video it.

There are people on here who seem to think that we're "just" talking about slaps.

One of the reasons that I'm not rushing back to do supply is that I'm too damned old to break up fights. I'm trying not to out myself, but one of the schools where I did supply hit the press when the parents of bullied children gave up on contacting the LA and contacted the newspapers instead.

The same week that I stopped a kid from being beaten up, two other female members of staff were hit because they were in the vicinity of pupil on pupil violence.

One young teacher had visible bruises and was made to feel that she was being difficult for not wanting the culprit in her class. The other member of staff was very heavily pregnant. Thankfully, the baby was okay.

The violence in Scottish schools is out of control.
As you said it's get the victim on the floor and kick punch and humiliate all filmed for the likes.
SNP have been soft on youth crime for years and here we are kids with no boundaries.

Yeah right you think they will care about what you saying

Oh @Kibble29 tsk tsk.... 'all behaviour is communication' dontcha know...🙄 what is your child doing to make them be hit...?

As I've said before, the problem (at least in Scotland) is that the police will absolutely not deal with anyone under the age of 16 unless it can be proved that it was attempted murder.

I can think of several 14/15 yr old pupils who were reported to the police for assaults within school or outside the school premises during lunch hour. Not one was charged.

Above, I outlined what happened when the same teenager attacked another pupil and went on to assault me and two other teachers. We made statements. The police "lost the paperwork".

The only time that something was taken seriously was when a junior set fire to a homeless person.

@Julia34 by simpering....'oh gosh, you're sad and unhappy.... oh of course the ONLY thing that's acceptable is you kicking the shit out of me..you poor lamb'...

Then watch as the coppers hand it right back to the school to deal with internally, via their bullying policy or whatever they have in place.

How would you stand for yourself without hitting back?

If another child is hitting or otherwise using violence against your child, report them. Not to the school, to the police.

Haha, you’re not wrong.

Also please consider possible autism, ADHD and/or a multitude of conditions that might mean that kicking lumps out of your son/daughter is outside of their control. Consider the home life of the bully and remember that all behaviour is communication. Actually, don’t use the term “bully”. It’s not kind.

Plenty of better ways to stand up for yourself than hitting back. It’s a bad thing to do as a child and a worse one to do as an adult.

My DD was bullied for nearly the whole school year.
We told her to ignore, to walk away, to tell an adult, etc. School supposedly had a zero-tolerance policy. We had multiple meetings with the head and were assured they would deal with it.
Watching your previously happy child crying going to school, crying coming home because her bully had picked on her again was heartbreaking.
We thought we were doing the right thing, but the day she came home and said that X had kicked her again and when she told the teacher she was told to go away and stop telling tales was the day I realised no one was looking out for her and it was down to her. I told her that next time X picked on her to hit her until she cried.
She did exactly that the very next day and from that moment on X stopped targeting her. My DD's confidence skyrocketed and I don't regret it for a moment.
I don't care if violence is not the answer. In an ideal world, it wouldn't have had to go that far, but I have no regrets and just wish we had done it sooner.

Ah but @Thelnebriati there's a collective here where we are dreadful, wicked people for being concerned about our own child who is being repeatedly assaulted.... we really need to be making sure the other child's OK first.. #bekind.

That the life outcome for 99% bullies life in prison

Yes I have always told my daughter who is 6 to never hit first but always defend herself.

Not in Scotland, if you're under the age of 16. That's probably one of the reasons why bullies here get off with so much.

To your other point - of course you give children the tools to avoid violence. Unfortunately, they don't always work and in those cases they need to be able to try to protect themselves from further assault. As I've said in previous posts, in secondary these days we're not talking about a simple slap or a single punch from bullies. Nowadays, I'm sorry to say, the bullies try to get their victims onto the floor.

Well no one has been able to explain what me and Ds should have done instead, after a year of being bullied and the school doing nothing.

The other kid has spent his late teen and early adult years in prison for murder. I'm just grateful it wasn't my DS he went for that time.

No, I just think we should raise our DC to behave how they are expected to behave in adult life. I actually think @DoreenonTill8 that there will be many parents of bullies on this thread. But not the ones that you mention. Many posters on here believe their DC and encourage violence, rather than working will the school. You can hear it in the pride some posters have at their child's violence.

But no I'm against violence because I work with women and children that experience domestic violence, and their exs are raised by parents that raise violent children and encourage violence in conflicts, which their DS' take forward into their marriages and parenting.

My husband did a bit of boxing. He always said that if you were in a situation where you had to throw a punch, punch through the nose and aim for the back of the head.

Yes of course. If someone else hits you then you hit back. Simples.

It really is the only way unless you want to continue to get bullied/walked over. Most bullies dont expect it back.

But of course you don't seem to think that there should be consequences for the bullying little scrote. Your posts paint you as having every excuse under the sun @Christmascrumbling for the actual villain of the piece, but wishing fire and brimstone for anyone who retaliates to them.

Am I alone in thinking there's a correlation with those posters saying 'oh noooo your child should NEVER use physical means to defend against an attack at school' and posters who may have the child who is the bully and instigator of the assaults...🤔

Exactly I can't imagine when the child is every day going full.of stress to.the school when bullies hit ,make laugh off and the child all alone have not even hope in teacher and neither in parents. This is recipe for suicide

But if he does it enough times, he doesn't return to school. And if he hurts someone enough in secondary, he also gets a criminal record for violence, that affects the rest of his life. So give him tools to get through secondary without resorting to violence at every turn.

And as my dear old dad (RIP) advised when he told me it was time to face up to my bully, throw your punch as if they are ‘this far away’ (further) rather than ‘this far’ (where they are, close to you) as you’ll do more damage that way.

(Reader: she never bothered me again…and even apologised a year or two later)