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AIBU?

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Original poster

To feel offended by my colleague being promoted

59 replies

MrNosey · 05/12/2024 18:13

I love my colleague, we have a great working relationship. Today (in front of me!) she was taken to the side and offered a promotion. I’m really happy for her and want her to get the position.
However, it’s a role that I’m also qualified for - and I feel - sad that we potentially won’t be together. But also that - I’m not good enough??

OP posts:
location · 05/12/2024 18:25

You should apply for the other one regardless of whether they invite you to apply or not.

Original poster
MrNosey · 05/12/2024 18:24

The positions have been advertised, but neither of us applied. There are two positions.
Colleague was taken to one side and asked to apply.

OP posts:
Anotherworrier · 05/12/2024 18:23

That’s a really shitty way to do that from management. I think I’d say something.

Pomegranatecarnage · 05/12/2024 18:22

That must have stung. I’d ask for some feedback as to why you weren’t considered. Also, it was unprofessional to take her aside in front of you.

MerryLiftMass · 05/12/2024 18:22

I would feel the same as you, happy for my colleague but sad for myself. That’s natural.

Ask if there will be another chance for promotion in the future and what you need to work on to be selected.

Microgal · 05/12/2024 18:22

Did you also apply for the position?

Original poster
MrNosey · 05/12/2024 18:20

It almost brings me back to secondary school where I was last to be picked!
I’ve worked my socks off, and it feel like I’ve been pretty much told in front of my face : we like my colleague, but we don’t want you.

OP posts:
RhaenysRocks · 05/12/2024 18:17

I'm not sure offended is the right word. It could have been handled more tactfully though. To do it in front of you is pretty poor management. I think it's fine to ask for a meeting to get clarity on the decision.

Cherryana · 05/12/2024 18:16

Well that sounds like a natural reaction to have.