Or is this Santa post unreasonable?

I remember not being that bothered about santa not being real. Think I was around 8 and a friend told me.
I asked my mum who probably wasnt expecting that question in the middle of summer and botched the 'of course he is' so i could tell from her expression 🤣.

I always found the courtroom scene in miracle of 34th rather over the top. The one where the kids was 'of course i dont believe its stupid!' And the mum being very upset at sants when a child thing. Haha

A lot of people who phrase it as ' lying' tp your child are trying to be contrarian and patronising really.

I’m more inclined to agree with her to be honest. I don’t really buy into Father Christmas being part of the magic of childhood. It’s not about children’s imagination; it’s children believing what they were told by their parents and society is true, and they can have just as much fun playing along and enjoying parts of Christmas that are real. I don’t remember caring much about Father Christmas as a child, and my Christmases didn’t change for me or my family when I didn’t believe any more. I figured out early on that Father Christmas wasn’t real, likely in part due to spending Christmas morning with friends whose children did Father Christmas differently to us and my childhood Christmases were plenty magical and fun because of time spent with loved ones. I wouldn’t have swapped those memories for more years of believing in someone who doesn’t exist anyway.

I’m pregnant with my first and not entirely sure what to do about the whole Santa thing when the time comes around. I won’t lie to my child if asked though, or put any effort into encouraging the belief of an increasingly sceptical child. I think trying to extend belief in Father Christmas beyond when a child is questioning is more about extending the idea of the magic for the parents, not the child. Father Christmas as a critical thinking exercise for children is one thing and figuring it out is part of it, but there’s threads every year about how a parent feels Christmas is ruined because their child figured it out, or was told someone else.

It was nothing to do with 'gentle parenting' for us - I've explained what we did on another post. No judgement of others who did what worked for them.

Agreed.
We never ever pretended Santa was real and talked about it as a story. We did tell him that other people did believe, and that he wasn't to go around spoiling that. AFAIK he didn't. Each to their own, but it did make life simpler and felt better to me not to lie. I don't judge anyone who does things differently though.

I have an aunt like this (who is thankfully childless) who I’m no contact with for other reasons. Before I cut her out of my life we were discussing Santa when I was pregnant and she asked if I was going to lie to my child about Santa?? I said I’ve been through some pretty traumatic stuff but Santa isn’t one of them; if anything I felt very appreciative to my parents for some of the gifts we got over the years.

she’s only a few years older than me (probably on the verge of getting to old to have a child now and her husband has left her anyway) but she was adamant that buying into the Santa idea was poisonous

Yanbu op. I think when society starting giving everything about parenting a name or a theme it all became a load of nonsense.

Most children don't feel 'lied' to, they normally feel pretty proud of themselves for being old enough and clever enough to work it all out. That said, I do think some parents go a little too far in their attempts to elongate the process.

More proof that gentle parenting is utter crap.

I think it’s up to each family to work out.