Do you tell your partner what you want for Christmas?

I give him a few ideas, if I want something specific I might mention it but more along the lines of telling him I want a new scarf/mug/pair of earrings and he then chooses which one so that there is still a surprise. But he also always gets me some surprise gifts and he's very good at choosing lovely thoughtful gifts.

We are in the extremely fortunate position of stuff we want, we buy, but I wouldn't usually buy myself really expensive perfume, and I want my DH to know exactly which perfume I want. I would hate him to guess and just buy me a random expensive perfume that I won't wear.

Simarly, I always ask him what he wants that he wouldn't buy himself.

Admittedly a bit boring, but satisfying on the day

Yes, with links! It seems a waste to me to get something that you quite like when the money could be spent on something that you love!

We send a list to each other but each get an off-list surprise from the children. We always list more so there is a bit of a surprise in which item will be bought. My mum likes to get my husband a decent present so his list is useful for her. When we had less money when the children were smaller, he bought me things like new glasses or winter boots. Now it’s more frivolous. He is good at the surprise bit and I’ve had some lovely things but he wants the security of knowing I will like at least one present.

Here we BUY our own Xmas presents and give them to "the other half" to wrap and give back on Xmas day.

Xmas Day is never marked by disappointment on the present front.

We do a list with ideas. I know my presents will come from that list and therefore be things I actually want but I won't know which he decided to get so it's still a bit of a surprise.

I send a few ideas and DH chooses from the list. Same for my gifts to him too. We don't have much money so don't want to risk any waste.

This is exactly what we do. That way both of us end up with what we want, and there is no risk of disappointment.
A trip to town, Christmas shop and a nice lunch or a few cocktails 😀

I wouldn’t see the point in this, I’d just buy whatever it was for myself.

My DP is not good at gifts so often I don’t get anything of he’ll suggest a biggish purchase and say ‘we could buy this for your birthday!’. I don’t get wound up about it these days. He’s fantastic in almost every other respect.

Hmm if I didn't send DP a list I'd end up with jewellery every birthday and Xmas. Which is all very nice but I rarely wear jewellery.

By speaking my mind I got an osprey backpack I wanted for my birthday which will be used far more often that jewellery. Need some clothes so will send him links soon.

We do both get each other token gifts as surprises

lol, brilliant.

Does make me feel a bit guilty about my mom when we were growing up though!

Might send it to the kids! : )

Haha it's the imagination which is dangerous! Have you read the pp's description of the dog made out of a car exhaust pipe? 😆

I have a new DP, second Xmas together.
i know he stresses out a bit around Xmas and is really worried about “getting it wrong” and that his late wife was very ‘easily disappointed’ (his words) and he’s used to being told what to get. So I’ve told him; because I’d hate to think of causing him stress it, and tbh I’m always worried about getting surprises and being watched for my initial reaction! A little surprise on top would be nice but it doesn’t really matter

I can top that. If I see something I love in the shop, I will buy it with his card and give them to him to wrap and gift.

Nothing expensive - for example I saw two beautiful hardback notebooks that I knew would give me joy every time I looked at them, plus a pair of gorgeous purple gloves. I realise I should have expected him to go to the shop and be telepathically drawn to these as otherwise it's oh so unromantic.

Yes of course I could have bought them myself but I like presents, he likes knowing I will choose things I love and it will be a surprise when I open them because it's so long since I, I mean he, bought them..

I show my DH several things I’d like and he can buy any/all of them or anything else he thinks I’d like. But he’s rubbish at gift buying and after years of crappy gifts this works better for us both. It doesn’t bother me that it’s like this as he has other skills and qualities I value more.

I send a few links throughout the year (by the time Christmas comes, I’ve forgotten) but DH is really good at gifts (for me only, he’s utter crap with everyone else!) and my main present is always a surprise. He’s never got it wrong yet (20+ years)

I ask dh to buy me nothing and I get exactly what I want. I buy me the best presents and I buy them when I need/want them. Gifts bought by other people are almost always a disappointment.

It depends, some years I have an idea of what I'd like and send a link (if he's not had any prior ideas himself) and other years I ask to be surprised, and he'll do a great job. This year as it happens we've both just sent links to each other, it's not very often this happens but we both had a strong idea of what we wanted for ourselves and our personal spends is tied up at the moment because we are saving money for a holiday away together without the kids (so we don't use our family holiday fund) so we haven't had as much money spend on ourselves that we usually would. I suspect we'll both want surprises next year! We've been together a long time now. We wrap them up because we think it's important our kids see us giving.

I usually ask for jewellery and send dh links to a few websites that I like and he chooses something.

I agree op, i think people should have enough imagination to buy a present for a person they love

If I didn't give DP a link of what I want, I'd end up with cash which is even more disappointing. I've kind of just accepted he isn't the kind of guy who will put thought into a gift he knows I'd like. It is disappointing, but I've had disappointing birthdays/christmases where I've had nothing, so at least this way, I get a present I want, and it's usually something I wouldn't spend money on for myself.

My mum, however, does spoil me and she always gets me lovely surprises.

We have Amazon wish lists with loads of things on. We can choose stuff off it-so it’s stuff we want but the buyer has an element of choice and the recipient has an lament of surprise! It’s worked for us for years.

I do the same and the disappointment is less than the disappointment of when he gets to freestyle.

My DH puts a lot of thought into gift buying. The problem is his thought process needs an intervention. First Christmas together he bought me a colander. Another time he bought me a metal dog made out of an old car exhaust pipe.

I always tell him what I want - with links.
My DDs tell us what they want - with links.
DH will just ask for “pyjamas” or some such. We spend about £40 on each other, up to £100 on our daughters.

We’ve been together 26 yrs and never bought each other Christmas gifts. Not birthday.

we find its much easier!