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AIBU?

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To feel a little bit sad that I won't receive Christmas presents any more?

255 replies

Wimberry · 04/12/2024 14:11

I'm aware this is Mumsnet, so I should be happy with my massive salad and thimble of sherry at Christmas, as anything else would make me incredibly selfish and childish. But I do feel a teensy bit sad that I have ended up in a situation where I receive zero Christmas presents, not having any surprises to unwrap.

For context - no children. Mum deceased and dad is distant and buys gifts so bad they're borderline offensive, he's also pleading poverty this year (he's well off, im not a priority) so we agreed to go for a meal at some point instead. It's for the best.

Rest of the family have moved towards buying gifts for children only (and TBF there's not many, no one expects expensive gifts so I don't mind this, although obviously there's none to come to us). I have a partner who is lovely and is good in many ways but is just so, so bad at buying gifts that a few years ago we decided not to bother. It isn't weaponised incompetence, just not his thing. He doesn't expect gifts in return, he's very pragmatic - if he wants something he'd rather buy it himself and get exactly what he wants/needs so he doesn't really enjoy gifts being brought for him. Instead of a work secret santa we're donating to a food bank.

Im not (usually!) materialistic so I am surprised that this makes me feel a bit sad, any alternative ideas for making Christmas feel a bit special, as a grown up?

OP posts:
FatsiaJaponicaInTheGarden · 04/12/2024 14:16

I understand this. I literally as the song says "buy myself flowers" now without needing a reason.

Its more than just presents isn't it-it's the thought behind it etc..but yes plan a lovely day and buy nice foods etc and buy yourself some treats and enjoy 😍

Comedycook · 04/12/2024 14:15

Tell your partner you want a present....send him a selection of things you'd like and ask him to buy you one so it's somewhat of a surprise.

Do you have a group of girlfriends? Could you suggest a secret Santa with them?

Brightwhitesobright · 04/12/2024 14:15

YANBU. I'm sorry you feel sad about it, I hope some posters have some ideas for you to help make your Christmas feel more special.

HPandthelastwish · 04/12/2024 14:15

I buy myself presents through the year and wrap them, by the time Christmas comes I've forgotten what they are, books, nice box of chocolates, tickets to theatre shows, nice hand cream etc things I see on offer during the year and like but don't need there and then.

Once DD is grown and no longer spending Christmas at home I fully intend to jet off somewhere warm for Christmas and laze by a pool.

Dweetfidilove · 04/12/2024 14:13

Can you amd partner go away somewhere as a gift to yourselves?