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Original poster

Friend not sharing discount?

216 replies

KellyJellyfish · 04/12/2024 09:56

I admit this is a very first world problem, but it’s been bothering me a bit so just thought I’d ask what others think.

I recently came back from mat leave, DD starts nursery in a couple weeks and of course it’s Christmas so money for me is tight and has been for a while.

A friend and me decided we would go to the cinema next week, this is a rare treat for me and I haven’t been to the cinema in several years, it’s not the cheapest experience anymore so I was already planning on forgoing popcorn and drinks to keep the cost down. My friend is aware of my situation, we also work together so she knows about mat leave and how our company only offers statuary, and I’ve been lamenting to her about the cost of nursery fees and how the family is only doing gifts for the kids this year.

Anyway, we’ve settled on a date and time, it’s a popular film so we decided to book together (otherwise we may not get seats together) I suggested to her my husband books the tickets as he gets a 40% discount for friends and family through work, but I mentioned it had been years since he last booked so I will double check with him first if he still gets this discount, she agreed.

Next day rolls around and I forgot to ask husband (turns out yes he does still get the discount), but then friend said don’t worry about it as she’s got a free cinema ticket (from a reward scheme tied to her bank or something) so she’ll take care of booking the tickets. I thanked her and said she should ping me a request for the money and I’ll pay her back.

Well last night I got her text, there was a copy of both our tickets and a money request for one full price ticket for me to pay. I had assumed she was going to share the saving of her free ticket so we’d both pay half price, instead she kept the free ticket for herself and stuck me with paying full price, even though I told her my husband could get us both a good discount.

I haven’t said anything because I imagine she just didn’t think it through and there’s no point falling out over cinema tickets, but I’m still annoyed about it. Obviously I know I’m
not entitled to her free ticket, but she could have saved it for another time instead of denying me my husbands discount?

OP posts:
Goldenbear · 04/12/2024 11:29

colesr · 04/12/2024 11:24

From her POV why should she pay 50% when she has a feee ticket?

Because the OP was going to get a discount for the both of them, because the OP has described her financial situation at the moment on maternity leave and nursery fees. A Good friend shows their friendliness in harder times, not just through the 'good' times!

SoNiceToComeHomeTo · 04/12/2024 11:28

ManhattanPopcorn · 04/12/2024 11:13

I'm not in the UK so correct me if I'm wrong - is a cinema ticket about £8? Is all of this over a £4 saving if you had spit the tickets vs £3.20 if you had used your husbands discount? My guess is that it didn't even cross her mind that there was anything to be annoyed about.

If only! Tickets where I live in the UK are around £13!

SoNiceToComeHomeTo · 04/12/2024 11:27

I understand why you are upset, I would have been too. Your friend hasn't registered that money is so tight that saving a few pounds on a cinema ticket is significant for you in a way that it may not be for her, and she didn't decide to share her discount with you just to be friendly. But it's not the end of the world and not worth falling out over.

Blogswife · 04/12/2024 11:26

Just send her half the total price. You offered to get you both the discount but she did it instead . Surely you split the cost whoever books ?

Ginkypig · 04/12/2024 11:25

Well I personally would have asked for 50% of the price of the other ticket so we could both get in cheaper but by the same logic I wouldn’t assume I would get the same offer from a friend who had got a free ticket.

it’s difficult because she hasn’t done anything wrong and I wouldn’t expect her to share but i almost certainly would have shared in the same position so I think it’s just a case of different people having different views.

colesr · 04/12/2024 11:24

From her POV why should she pay 50% when she has a feee ticket?

whatnow5 · 04/12/2024 11:23

Nolegusta · 04/12/2024 11:15

Do you make needless comments like this in real life or just on MN for the sake of it? 🫣

Show quote history

Ah so you are just generally awful? I doubt you need to worry about being invited to the cinema, or anywhere else!

Goldenbear · 04/12/2024 11:22

ManhattanPopcorn · 04/12/2024 11:13

I'm not in the UK so correct me if I'm wrong - is a cinema ticket about £8? Is all of this over a £4 saving if you had spit the tickets vs £3.20 if you had used your husbands discount? My guess is that it didn't even cross her mind that there was anything to be annoyed about.

It's nearly £15 where I live, depends on he cinemas locally available to you.

But should a friend, a real friend be thoughtless and how can you forget to not be stingy, I don't get that, I think it's just an excuse from those who are mean with money!

travelallthetime · 04/12/2024 11:15

getahhtmapub · 04/12/2024 10:05

It's friends discount to use as she wishes. If it's through her bank it's not a 'freebie' it's kind of a paid for benefit that's part of her account fee.

You forgot to ask your DH so she probably assumed you weren't bothered about a discount or were happy to just ha wa rocket booked.

I've booked airline tickets before for a group and used my airmiles to reduce the cost of my ticket. I wouldn't be passing on the saving to the whole group. If they had discounts they wanted to use I'd expect them to say so and book their own. Same thing here I think.

massively different than having to pay a fiver for a cinema ticket

Nolegusta · 04/12/2024 11:15

whatnow5 · 04/12/2024 10:54

Are you this stingy in real life or just contrary online for the sake of it?

Show quote history

Do you make needless comments like this in real life or just on MN for the sake of it? 🫣

shimmeringlight · 04/12/2024 11:14

Can you ring up cinema and say your friend bought you a ticket but forgot to apply your discount and can you rebook. They might say no but it's surprising how many people say yes.

ManhattanPopcorn · 04/12/2024 11:13

I'm not in the UK so correct me if I'm wrong - is a cinema ticket about £8? Is all of this over a £4 saving if you had spit the tickets vs £3.20 if you had used your husbands discount? My guess is that it didn't even cross her mind that there was anything to be annoyed about.

OTannenbaumOTannenbaum · 04/12/2024 11:12

Even if my friend weren't skint, I'd still offer to split the ticket. And I know my friends would do the same for me.

Tiswa · 04/12/2024 11:11

Whatsitreallylike · 04/12/2024 10:52

Yea that’s not on. I’d reply and remind her that you can get discounted tickets through your DH. Ask her to cancel your full price ticket and you’ll book your own ticket at the reduced price.

This respond back and say that really sorry but you don’t want to pay for a full price ticket hence the conversation about the discount

Mosaic123 · 04/12/2024 11:11

It is just plain mean of her.
It shows she does not have a giving and sharing nature.

I would probably keep the friendship if it suits me but make sure not to be generous back.

BlastedPimples · 04/12/2024 11:08

Bit stingy. People can be stingy.

bigkidatheart · 04/12/2024 11:08

Ask her to cancel your ticket and I will send you my free ticket code off Monzo, you also get 10% off food and drink

OldTinHat · 04/12/2024 11:07

I had a friend who used to piggy back on the Meerkat cinema 241 tickets. I had a cineworld unlimited membership and she used to join me FOC.

It used to drive me insane! I bought my membership, she should have offered me half her ticket price but never did. She actually bragged to our friendship group that she gets free cinema tickets because she went with me.

No more!

Enough4me · 04/12/2024 11:07

She is selfish and stingy. It didn't even cross her mind to let you know that she wasn't sharing her voucher. If she had written and said, "don't worry about getting your DH discount for my ticket I have a voucher", you'd know to book your own. She made sure she's OK, but not you.
Real friends don't do that!

InformEducateEntertain · 04/12/2024 11:06

Yet another example of when proper communication and not making assumptions would have resolved the issue before it even happened.

Elbbob · 04/12/2024 11:05

Agree she should have split the cost. Probably just thoughtless, or worse, mean.

Be aware it is likely she will buy a drink and popcorn for herself, and won't share. So make sure you have your own drink and tasty snacks to take in.

Chalk it up to experience and just buy your own in future, or make sure you are alert to any scenario where you need to split costs with her.

MidnightMeltdown · 04/12/2024 11:05

I think it depends on the nature of the discount. If it was buy 1 get 1 free, then she is being unreasonable for not sharing the discount, as she is using you to get her discount.

However, if she simply had a free ticket then that's different. Technically you could have booked your tickets separately and each paid for your own.

TheThreeCheesesOfTheApocalypse44 · 04/12/2024 11:04

Yanbu. Me and my friend always share the discount.....and take your own snacks in. It's perfectly fine.

UrsulasHerbBag · 04/12/2024 11:04

She is thoughtless and mean. YANBU.

BarbaraHoward · 04/12/2024 11:04

Dietingfool · 04/12/2024 11:03

I suspect this is thoughtlessness rather than anything else. Often people who aren’t struggling hard financially don’t really comprehend how 4 pounds can make such a big difference to someone. She likely didn’t think as it was a small amount, not realising it was very significant to you. Yes she knew money was tight, but maybe didn’t realise just how tight it was.

Yes agree this, more likely thoughtless than stingy.

Unless she has form I'd put it down to experience.

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