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Original poster

Friend not sharing discount?

216 replies

KellyJellyfish · 04/12/2024 09:56

I admit this is a very first world problem, but it’s been bothering me a bit so just thought I’d ask what others think.

I recently came back from mat leave, DD starts nursery in a couple weeks and of course it’s Christmas so money for me is tight and has been for a while.

A friend and me decided we would go to the cinema next week, this is a rare treat for me and I haven’t been to the cinema in several years, it’s not the cheapest experience anymore so I was already planning on forgoing popcorn and drinks to keep the cost down. My friend is aware of my situation, we also work together so she knows about mat leave and how our company only offers statuary, and I’ve been lamenting to her about the cost of nursery fees and how the family is only doing gifts for the kids this year.

Anyway, we’ve settled on a date and time, it’s a popular film so we decided to book together (otherwise we may not get seats together) I suggested to her my husband books the tickets as he gets a 40% discount for friends and family through work, but I mentioned it had been years since he last booked so I will double check with him first if he still gets this discount, she agreed.

Next day rolls around and I forgot to ask husband (turns out yes he does still get the discount), but then friend said don’t worry about it as she’s got a free cinema ticket (from a reward scheme tied to her bank or something) so she’ll take care of booking the tickets. I thanked her and said she should ping me a request for the money and I’ll pay her back.

Well last night I got her text, there was a copy of both our tickets and a money request for one full price ticket for me to pay. I had assumed she was going to share the saving of her free ticket so we’d both pay half price, instead she kept the free ticket for herself and stuck me with paying full price, even though I told her my husband could get us both a good discount.

I haven’t said anything because I imagine she just didn’t think it through and there’s no point falling out over cinema tickets, but I’m still annoyed about it. Obviously I know I’m
not entitled to her free ticket, but she could have saved it for another time instead of denying me my husbands discount?

OP posts:
Goldenbear · 04/12/2024 13:43

Nolegusta · 04/12/2024 13:39

It's not noise.

Show quote history

Yes it is as irrelevant to the situation which is the principle of the thing.

Tink3rbell30 · 04/12/2024 13:42

You need to call her out or this thread is pointless.

Cakeandcardio · 04/12/2024 13:40

LittleRedRidingHoody · 04/12/2024 10:03

I think you're being a bit unreasonable. You both agreed to go, she was probably planning on using the free ticket all along, when you said your husband would book she decided to take the hit and pay more to subsidise you. When he didn't, she went back to her original plan.

I get maternity leave sucks and sharing the discount would have been nice of her, but it's not out of order. You were happy to pay full price to begin with.

Well her friend could have been upfront about this and only booked her own ticket? Why should the friend get a free ticket and the OP pays full price when the OP could have got a 40% reduction. Selfish!

paddlinglikecrazy · 04/12/2024 13:40

I think I’d be more pissed off she offered to book & not share the cost when she knew if you booked yourself you could’ve used your own 40% off.
so it ended up costing you more that way.
not very kind.

Nolegusta · 04/12/2024 13:39

Goldenbear · 04/12/2024 13:37

That's just the technical noise though, what it comes down to as the realisation that your friend is tight and has landed you with a full price ticket for her own convenience i.e to buy two tickets seated next to each other. With friends like that who needs enemies!

Show quote history

It's not noise.

Goldenbear · 04/12/2024 13:37

Nina1013 · 04/12/2024 13:25

It’s a different kind of discount. He has unlimited 40% off - you giving it to her/me/anyone doesn’t mean you pay more for yours.

She has a defined and finite benefit of a single ticket, so she can go for free but wouldn’t be to subsidise you.

The comparison would be if the 40% had a value so by splitting it you both got a 20% discount.

So while it’s a nice to do, offering her the discount, it’s not actually meaning you get less discount yourself. Whereas she’s got a single free ticket which she wouldn’t benefit from if she gave you 50%…

Show quote history

That's just the technical noise though, what it comes down to as the realisation that your friend is tight and has landed you with a full price ticket for her own convenience i.e to buy two tickets seated next to each other. With friends like that who needs enemies!

candlerhyme · 04/12/2024 13:35

I would think less of her.

NetZeroZealot · 04/12/2024 13:29

Maybe she’s planning to buy the drinks & popcorn?

Nina1013 · 04/12/2024 13:26

Neodymium · 04/12/2024 13:19

I’d say hers was a buy one get one free.

can the tickets be refunded? I’d ask her to refund and book the ticket yourself

It won’t be, my bank account gives me 6 free cinema tickets a year. Standalone, don’t need an additional purchase.

LindaDawn · 04/12/2024 13:26

Viviennemary · 04/12/2024 10:11

That was quite cheeky of her. I wouldnt go and write off the cost of the ticket and drop the friendship. I can't be doing with this selfish meanness in folk that are supposed to be friends.

But doesn’t she also work with this person? That would be akward then to break up the friendship.

Nina1013 · 04/12/2024 13:25

KellyJellyfish · 04/12/2024 10:11

This is certainly what I think yes, and it’s how I use my discounts on group outings, for example I offered to share husbands discount with her when I could have kept it to myself.

Not everyone agrees though, that’s why I posted here though to see what others thought.

I think people are getting a bit hung up on the timing thing. We’re seeing the film in the morning on a smaller screen, it’s not a popular time so we had plenty of time to book, but there is always a risk if you try to book separately you may not be able to select seats right next to each other. There was never a risk it would sell out and we’d miss out, not many people see films first thing in the morning (the later showing on the bigger screen is the one that’s selling out fast)

Show quote history

It’s a different kind of discount. He has unlimited 40% off - you giving it to her/me/anyone doesn’t mean you pay more for yours.

She has a defined and finite benefit of a single ticket, so she can go for free but wouldn’t be to subsidise you.

The comparison would be if the 40% had a value so by splitting it you both got a 20% discount.

So while it’s a nice to do, offering her the discount, it’s not actually meaning you get less discount yourself. Whereas she’s got a single free ticket which she wouldn’t benefit from if she gave you 50%…

Neodymium · 04/12/2024 13:19

I’d say hers was a buy one get one free.

can the tickets be refunded? I’d ask her to refund and book the ticket yourself

tachetastic · 04/12/2024 13:17

HerSisterWasAWitch · 04/12/2024 09:59

But she couldn’t get you both the offer, meaning she would be subsiding your ticket. Your DH could have got you both a discount, which was nice of you to offer, but you forgot.

True, but she could have let OP's husband book OP's ticket and use her own free one. She specifically told OP that she would book, knowing OP would have to pay the full price rather than benefit from DH's discount.

It seems weird to say "don't worry about claiming the discount, I'll book you a full price ticket". Why would the friend assume anyone would go with that?

LittleRedRidingHoody · 04/12/2024 13:14

@WiddlinDiddlin Monzo and I think Lloyds now offers 'free' cinema tickets. No purchase of a full price one necessary - I used mine the other day. Not really free because you are paying for the service through which you get the tickets (in my case, Monzo perks)

LinManuelMirandaIsAGenius · 04/12/2024 13:12

You are not unreasonable to be a bit upset/annoyed AT ALL. What sort of “friend” does that? I’ll be told I’m pathetic/dramatic but I would honestly never look at someone the same way if they did this to me, and no, I don’t expect to be subsidised by my friends (or anyone) for ANYTHING. If someone shows who they are, I believe them.
I would honestly distance myself from this person as I couldn’t enjoy their company knowing how little they thought of me. I cannot abide meanness in people. Especially friends/family! Horrible woman…!

Pompeyssy · 04/12/2024 13:11

If it is a BOGOF offer then she is a complete CF and no friend.

Very silly of you not to ask for clarification.
I couldn't stomach that in a "friend".

Nolegusta · 04/12/2024 13:10

KellyJellyfish · 04/12/2024 10:43

A lot of faff over like a £1 difference for her.

We’ve both paid, I’m not going to do anything else at this point, I’m just going to make a mental note to book my own when seeing her in the future

Show quote history

But you hadn't booked or sorted out tje discount, so she went ahead. Not sure how its £1 difference if the tickets are £10 each. Now she pays nothing, with your option it was £6 each?

CautiousLurker1 · 04/12/2024 13:08

WiddlinDiddlin · 04/12/2024 13:05

Yeah I am confused here...

I don't know of any bank account benefits that get you a free ticket.. only the ones that get you a free ticket if you buy a full price ticket.

So whilst it is her discount, without your full price ticket there would be no free ticket.

If this is the case she is a massive cheeky fucker as you could have got in for 40% but now you're subsidising her free ticket, and at full price!

Yes, this.

annonymousse · 04/12/2024 13:08

If it was a bogof offer she's used you to subsidise her. That's very mean even without knowing your circumstances. With one freebie it would have been nicer to share the discount. She's been very selfish.

eqpi4t2hbsnktd · 04/12/2024 13:07

Why don't you speak to her?

WiddlinDiddlin · 04/12/2024 13:05

Yeah I am confused here...

I don't know of any bank account benefits that get you a free ticket.. only the ones that get you a free ticket if you buy a full price ticket.

So whilst it is her discount, without your full price ticket there would be no free ticket.

If this is the case she is a massive cheeky fucker as you could have got in for 40% but now you're subsidising her free ticket, and at full price!

Btc76 · 04/12/2024 13:03

OP, With the time you've spent on here in a funk about the extra £4 or so it will cost you to see a film, you could have earned that doing a min wage job! Pls get real

CautiousLurker1 · 04/12/2024 13:00

I agree - given she knew you could get a 40% discount if you booked yourself using your DH’s code, this is especially shitty. I suspect she had to buy a second ticket to get her free ticket too.

I am a mature student so can get student rate tickets at the cinema and theatre. Often this means I get a £40-60 theatre ticket for £10ish. When I buy tickets and invite a friend, I split the total cost in half so that she gets the ticket at almost half price. I don’t understand why your friend wouldn’t naturally do the same?

Mugcake · 04/12/2024 12:59

That's pretty selfish of her, I would assume you'd split the ticket cost! I have done this for and with friends before. I just thought that it goes without saying.

Lalalol · 04/12/2024 12:58

Cailleach1 · 04/12/2024 12:38

So, @Lalalol , I presume your free ticket is not a pay for one and get one free type. Fair enough if that is the case.

However, why did the op’s friend then go and deprive the op of their own discount by landing them with a full price ticket when they knew op could get one with 40% off. Op could just as easily have insisted, ‘I’ll pay’ and purchased two full price tickets. Or only hers at the 40% discount, thereby landing the other person with the bill for their ticket at full price.

Feels to me that the friend probably didn’t overthink this. Op didn’t get back to her about the husband’s discount - I expect she assumed it didn’t materialise.

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