Endless endless jobs

AuraBora

I find that you can’t make a mistake or forget anything otherwise it will cost you 3 or 4 figures at least

@Yalta I feel your pain - currently battling with HMRC about a late VAT payment. I accepted it was late but there was no warning of the penalty - there is supposed to be a letter with notice ahead of the penalty being applied. They sent a letter but a week had elapsed before it actually arrived, presumably because the postal service is so dire... endless VAT returns and self assessment stuff is the worst thing about being self-employed, it's a constant struggle even with an accountant!!
I feel like the constant struggle to juggle everything is getting worse and has really peaked this year - I think the cost of living is really having an impact as I am also spending more time trying to find good deals, shop around, negotiate with insurers, phone companies etc etc etc. and it's never-ending and very time-consuming.
@SprinkleOfSunak
i really struggle to even begin, and when I do, even if I tick one or two items off my list then I find it so hard to keep on going and will instead do other things as I find the list overbearing.
Yes, this totally, I am the same! I start each week with a list of to-do jobs and never get through them all, there is always a back log.
I work part time but have a very demanding toddler and can't get much done when he is around - I'm looking to go full time next year as at least that means a bit more money if even less time!!!

I just feel like it’s a constant battle with companies taking money, billing me or fines I shouldn’t receive and the constant emailing, getting proof together and trying to add it into the email only for them to turn round and say I still owe it.

Fined for not doing my tax return by 30th January. Except I did do my tax return and had conformation I had done it and it had been received

Only issue was they didn’t tell me they had fined me till I received a letter telling me I had been taken to court and because I didn’t attend then the court found in favour of the other party. Took me several phone callls to find out who had taken me to court. Then pay the courts to stop a court court judgement on my credit file. Then having to send proof to HMRC to get my £250 back. Still had to pay for solicitor (£125) because I should have told them I didn’t need to be taken to court.
They assured me they had written to me but I never received the letter

Then there is Ovo who can’t seem to read

Asked why my closing balance on my statement of eg £150 on 4th November statement changed to £456 as the brought forward figure on the following months statement

Replied with the £678 was adjusted in June 2023 and that they keep telling me this

Please make it make sense

I'm so glad I'm not alone. I'm also selling a house atm. It's just so exhausting 🫠.

I feel completely overwhelmed every day, and deeply fed up as the to do lists for life admin and at work are not reducing.

i really struggle to even begin, and when I do, even if I tick one or two items off my list then I find it so hard to keep on going and will instead do other things as I find the list overbearing.

Yep house is a complete shit tip with stuff everywhere. Completely overwhelmed. Mental and physical health is going down the drain.

Here's a couple of the first threads that popped up when I typed 'construction jobs 50 hrs'. Some are discussing Aus/US but the situation is pretty much the same over here. Should give an insight into the industry.

https://www.reddit.com/r/civilengineering/comments/yq6t7w/50_hour_work_weeks/

https://www.reddit.com/r/Construction/comments/o2itms/4550_hour_work_weeks_how_do_you_do_it/

I'm in construction on the aggregates side. Mainly providing concrete to large civil builds like HS2 and residential/university builds. Tower blocks etc.

50 hours is on the low end for most truck drivers and is pretty standard for construction guys - groundworkers, piling companies, etc. Although some do eight hours and some do 12.

12 hour shifts are common in a lot of industries. I know HGV mechanics and security guards that work these type of shifts, for example. Concrete drivers are notorious for long hours. I saw an American documentary and the guy was doing 75 hour weeks, which admittedly doesn't happen much over here. But 13-14 hour shifts are relatively common when things go wrong.

I started work at 7am today and it was at least 20:30 by the time I left the plant. I made about £300 though and spent most of the day twiddling my thumbs waiting on suppliers so I didn't really mind - nothing really happened until after lunch. Even managed to get a cheeky hour's nap in.

50 hours are my contracted basic hours

What kind of job has those kind of contracted hours? Are you in the UK?

I think it depends. I do 'a man's job' and somebody on here commented the other day that if I'm working 50hr weeks I'm presumably not doing this month in and out. In reality, 50 hours are my contracted basic hours (7-5) and I often do between 50-60 once you include overtime.

It's 99% men where I work and my average day is like doing an eight hour office job and then 2-3 hours of housework on top - except the housework still needs done after that. Most of my female friends work 37.5 hrs a week or part time.

yes even though my mum worked, she taught and it was completely different to the workload of teachers now. DH dad had a similar job to him and DMIL stayed at home and they do say they have no idea how we manage. Although this post has made me grateful how much they “get” the load and are really lovely and supportive.
my grandparents looked after me at times and did housework while mum was working but I’d never feel comfortable with that so maybe I’m making a rod for my own back!
next year is my year of not taking on any more bullshit stuff - I’ll let you know if it makes a difference!

I'm with you. Life has got a lot busier. And we have less free time. My parents will occasionally remark on something that needs doing in the garden or the house and they just don't get how little time we have. My dad worked hard but locally so had no commute. My mum gave up work when she had a baby and never went back. So out of a week as a couple they spent five days at work and between them had nine days free for everything else. In contrast we both commute when not wfh so have longer work days and both work full time so as a couple we work ten days and have four for everything else.

Plus there's loads more expected now - more school events than I had, kids clubs, evening work events, etc. It's never ending!

But on a serious note, I think we are all overloaded and there is going to be a price to pay for that both health-wise and as a society. Life seems so busy and pressured, especially for women.

I am so glad it isn’t just me! I work part time but compressed (so three days out of the house for 13 hours at a time as long commute). I thought I was going to be laughing when youngest started school in September. Two full child free days to get the house sorted! Well, I tell you, I never stop on those days and I still don’t know where the time goes - I have been trying to declutter, and decorate a room, but seriously. I’m still doing stuff at weekends and have never felt so stressed.

Really identify with the poster above who described a tidal wave of stuff washing into the hall each day!

I probably sound very inefficient so should caveat this by adding I have a ND child who takes a high degree of management - mainstream school but requires a lot of emotional support at home as well as some appointments. Plus DC1 is older so doesn’t go to bed so early now so I can never get anything done before 9.30pm. Plus a younger child who would also like some of my attention.

DH pulls his weight with the kids and garden but seems to have decided the house and life admin are my problem now I’ve got all this free time 🙄 and the list of things it would never occur to him to do is long, many and varied (of recent jobs - clean the oven, check kids’ Christmas jumpers and work out who needs a new one, start drafting EHCNA application for DC1, clear out hall drawer of outgrown mittens/gloves, sort outgrown clothes/toys and sell/pass on/give away, haggle over car insurance rather than accept ridiculously priced renewal, repeat for 3 other policies…..)

I’m a list maker.
Preferably a paper list so I can delete with great gusto when I’ve tackled a job.

Somehow hitting the delete button doesn’t swing it for me.

This is why it completely baffles me that some women enjoy the chaos of having lots of children.

I think it's the sheer relentlessness of it as well. To be fair, my dh is good (not brilliant, I still carry the mental load on a lot of things) but he's good, he does the dc in the mornings so I can walk the dog or exercise before work, he irons school uniforms, he does daily things like bins and dishwasher etc. he's not so great in the monthly chores department. He buys all dc Christmas and birthday presents though after a few years ago I flatly refused. I do stockings for the dc but he organises and orders and wraps everything else.

I agree with a the posters above- I always make time to exercise as a priority. We're so busy that 30-40 minutes makes FA difference to the chores but makes a huge difference to mental wellbeing. Plus I have found that jotting it down helps. I pick a couple of things each week I'm actually going to do. The 100 items swirling on the list then remain contained but I can still get my 'tick' for doing my 3 or 4, plus it means I can actually think of things (because that's the other problem isn't it? We're so overwhelmed that sometimes I can't even think of what needs doing!)

The other thing we're trying hard to do is as we do work on the house is future proof and make life easier, not just aesthetically better. Storage, easy to clean etc. - admittedly that's playing the long game.

Yep. December is bad for this in general, and I have a December birthday child.
Head feels ready to explode!

You've totally missed the point, the passport renewal is just yet another thing to be done, there'll be 10 more of those jobs that don't need doing often but there's multiples of them!

Agree with last couple posts here…

Men have no idea!

Adults (women) weren’t this busy in the 80s/90s.
My mum was as at home. My dad came home at 5pm.

There is no spare minute…

It’s never-ending…

I remember my young, carefree days, when neither work nor home would ever bother me. I was always having a laugh!

Now, there’s just so much to do. All of the time!

Yes same here. Parcels to collect,parcels to drop off, emails to respond to, payments to make, do my day job, do my side hustle after my day job, look after myself and keep a toddler alive. There's no spare minute in the day!

Yes I am fucking sick of the oppressive tide of shite constant bollocks little and big jobs that always need sorting and only ever increase.
It really isn't funny is it? Total overwhelm.
Every little job leads to several more jobs. Need to fix a plate. Drive to shop, spend 20 mins looking for glue that they have placed in illogical location. Queue to purchase glue. Pull out of parking space, notice windscreen wash is low. Top that up. Spill fluid on hands, great, now smell terrible. Probably need to wash this jumper now.
I really don't think I remember adults being this busy when I was a child in the 80s/90s.

I feel permanently anxious in the pit of my stomach because I know that there are more jobs piling up all the time. We were not meant to juggle full time work with looking after children and a home, it's exhausting. My DH does try but he just doesn't get the mental load. Like I was explaining that I think about getting something out of the freezer for dinner every morning (because I know he won't) and he just looked at me in surprise and said 'well I just combine looking after DS (toddler) with a trip to the supermarket to get something for dinner when I have him. It combines errands with amusing him, don't see?' I love him very much but could have punched him because I combine looking after DS with taking him to the trampoline park to tire him out, going to Dunelm to pick up supplies eg curtain rail and sewing bits, ordering Christmas food for his bloody family to come on Christmas Day, timing an online meeting with 30 minutes of Bluey, cleaning the bathroom, hoovering, a load of laundry, squeezing in some emailed while the kettle boils for his pasta, planning an outfit his dad can put him in to go to nursery while I leave for work, planning and cooking a nutritious dinner he'll actually eat before he gets too scratchy, making the beds, untangling Christmas lights, the list goes on. Men have no idea. No. Fucking. Idea.