Especially those who don't seem to be particularly nice?!
There’s a child at my kids’ school who is incredibly popular. I’m there quite a bit for various reasons, and it’s astonishing how much attention this one child gets. Their name is constantly being called, for example if someone does something vaguely impressive, they want this kid to see it or if there’s a game going on, they want this kid to join. The school has noticed too and the parents called in at one point because the sheer level of attention was becoming too much.
We’ve known this kid for years. Back in nursery, their name was a regular feature on reports concerning my children (think hitting, arguments, that sort of thing). It was very much a love-hate dynamic as they and my DC often brought out the worst in each other but still sought each other’s company. This has calmed down a bit of late, but since we've hit school I now hear from
other parents that this child isn’t particularly kind. Stories like orchestrating games to leave others out, saying 'I hate you' or “If you do X mean thing to so-and-so, you can play with us.” This doesn't seem like completely off the wall behaviour for kids based on my memory of being one, but I always thought it would happen when they were bigger rather than reception/year 1. Showing my naïvity perhaps but it's not happening with the majority, haven't heard anything about the other 20+ children so does seem like the exception rather than the rule at this point.
I’m trying (often failing but still trying!) not to judge too harshly—they’re still very little, and so much can change. But it does make me wonder: why is it that people, even young children, often crave the approval of those who aren’t very kind? And what is it which makes some people SO much more popular than others?!