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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask for opinions on these age gaps?

69 replies

Jumell · 02/12/2024 15:05

I’ve got no kids - but am interested in what you think - my best mate from college is expecting her 5th in March.

By the time new baby’s born - her existing kids will be the following ages :

15
9
5
3
Opinions on this family structure?

OP posts:
competitiveclasswarriorheretotellyouyourewrong · 02/12/2024 15:32

So why do you care?

Why didn't you ask what my favourite colour of lightbulb is?

There are a billion pointless questions you could ask, why are you invested in this one?

Original poster
Jumell · 02/12/2024 15:31

Butchyrestingface · 02/12/2024 15:13

This is such a strange thread to start without any context on why you would ask such a thing about someone else.

Has your friend been receiving unpleasant comments from someone?

No - why on earth would someone want to make unpleasant comments ?

OP posts:
Original poster
Jumell · 02/12/2024 15:30

GoldsolesLugs · 02/12/2024 15:27

No you don't, you feel like she's done something wrong and want mumsnet backup for your feelings of smug superiority.

Show quote history

This couldn’t be further from the truth

OP posts:
GoldsolesLugs · 02/12/2024 15:27

Jumell · 02/12/2024 15:24

I think it’s a lovely spread of ages but people are different in their opinions

Show quote history

No you don't, you feel like she's done something wrong and want mumsnet backup for your feelings of smug superiority.

Original poster
Jumell · 02/12/2024 15:24

competitiveclasswarriorheretotellyouyourewrong · 02/12/2024 15:23

You first.

What do you think of this family structure?
What have you posted about it on Mumsnet?

Why did you post about this one and didn't post about one of your other friends family structures?

I think it’s a lovely spread of ages but people are different in their opinions

OP posts:
competitiveclasswarriorheretotellyouyourewrong · 02/12/2024 15:23

You first.

What do you think of this family structure?
What have you posted about it on Mumsnet?

Why did you post about this one and didn't post about one of your other friends family structures?

GoldsolesLugs · 02/12/2024 15:18

Does she know that you've posted on mumsnet about her future family structure. If not, you're weird.

uptheculdesac · 02/12/2024 15:17

Such a weird post. So your friend is having another dc. She is 34. Ummm. Am I missing something here? What is the point of the post? What do you want to know about the age gaps? They seem pretty generic

RandomUsernameHere · 02/12/2024 15:15

With such a big spread of ages I'd find it hard to keep them all happy on holidays/days out etc. Five would be hard work regardless though!

ObtuseMoose · 02/12/2024 15:14

You seem confused by the simplest things OP.

Original poster
Jumell · 02/12/2024 15:13

PassAggJumper · 02/12/2024 15:12

Would instinctively judge that as none of my business.

Different strokes for different folks. Some people like tiny age gaps to get all the baby stuff out of the way quickly. Others would really struggle with that and space them out more. There isn't a one size fits all.

She was 18 having her first and is now 34

as I say - it seems great - but would it be hard work ?

OP posts:
Butchyrestingface · 02/12/2024 15:13

This is such a strange thread to start without any context on why you would ask such a thing about someone else.

Has your friend been receiving unpleasant comments from someone?

Original poster
Jumell · 02/12/2024 15:12

EoinMahoney · 02/12/2024 15:10

Cross-posted.

Edited

Not at all. I think it seems a great family structure

I just want to know what actual parents think or if not parents - people with generally more ‘family’ experience than me

OP posts:
PassAggJumper · 02/12/2024 15:12

Would instinctively judge that as none of my business.

Different strokes for different folks. Some people like tiny age gaps to get all the baby stuff out of the way quickly. Others would really struggle with that and space them out more. There isn't a one size fits all.

EoinMahoney · 02/12/2024 15:10

Cross-posted.

Original poster
Jumell · 02/12/2024 15:09

CandleStub · 02/12/2024 15:07

Sounds fine to me. Every set up has pros and cons.

Thank you. I agree with you

OP posts:
Original poster
Jumell · 02/12/2024 15:09

Frozensnowflake · 02/12/2024 15:06

Why?

Interest that’s all

Mumsnet would have a lot of family oriented types

I just wonder how stressful my friend finds family life

she’ll always be one of my role models - she’s run a marathon etc and a few years ago she was my main weight loss inspiration ❤️🙌

OP posts:
CandleStub · 02/12/2024 15:07

Sounds fine to me. Every set up has pros and cons.

Frozensnowflake · 02/12/2024 15:06

Why?

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