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Original poster

To ask for opinions on these age gaps?

69 replies

Jumell · 02/12/2024 15:05

I’ve got no kids - but am interested in what you think - my best mate from college is expecting her 5th in March.

By the time new baby’s born - her existing kids will be the following ages :

15
9
5
3
Opinions on this family structure?

OP posts:
Original poster
Jumell · 02/12/2024 16:20

booisbooming · 02/12/2024 16:14

If you like having a lot of kids, which I wouldn't but some people do, those are pretty good age gaps. Quite Sound of Music.

That’s what I thought - plenty of variety!

OP posts:
Original poster
Jumell · 02/12/2024 16:19

GoldsolesLugs · 02/12/2024 16:14

So you do think that they can't afford another kid. Another kid means more expense, and if they currently have no money to spare then they can't afford it, right?

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WRONG!

when the 5th kid is born they’ll cut the cloth accordingly - maybe buy slightly cheaper food etc … they may not have money to spare at the end of the week with the 5th kid also - but I’ve every faith that they WILL make it work !

OP posts:
Starlight1979 · 02/12/2024 16:16

Jumell · 02/12/2024 15:57

Husband works full time - no benefits but at end of week they’ve nothing to spare

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A lot of people have nothing to spare with no kids! So fair play to them for not claiming benefits and still managing to support a family of 7.

booisbooming · 02/12/2024 16:14

If you like having a lot of kids, which I wouldn't but some people do, those are pretty good age gaps. Quite Sound of Music.

GoldsolesLugs · 02/12/2024 16:14

Jumell · 02/12/2024 15:57

Husband works full time - no benefits but at end of week they’ve nothing to spare

Show quote history

So you do think that they can't afford another kid. Another kid means more expense, and if they currently have no money to spare then they can't afford it, right?

PearBears · 02/12/2024 16:13

competitiveclasswarriorheretotellyouyourewrong · 02/12/2024 16:11

Your friend is a role model in society.

Global fertility rates are plummeting and the effect on the elderly, working age people, children and all sections of society will be devastating.

Governments everywhere are trying to do all they can to increase the birth rate to avoid disaster, but it's not working.
Even subsaharan African countries that once had a birth rate of 5 per woman are going down to 4 and lower. It doesn't sound like much to start with but it is part of a global problem. The rate is below 0.7 children per woman in South Korea.

The only way we can solve this is by increasing the brith rate.

It's a massive toll on parents and especially women to have children and to have larger families and so people like your friend are doing a service to society.

The age gaps between her children are ideal in terms of her allowing her body to heal and re nourish between pregnancies and be able to give the maximum time and resources to each child.

We need more people like your friend to avert the coming disaster. You should be very proud of her and if you can at all manage it, emulate this reproductively for the good of society.

Christ! Lie back and think of England eh 😆

PearBears · 02/12/2024 16:13

Fair play to her for managing 5 kids I guess. Wouldn't be for me. She certainly wouldn't be my role model at all 🤣

competitiveclasswarriorheretotellyouyourewrong · 02/12/2024 16:11

Your friend is a role model in society.

Global fertility rates are plummeting and the effect on the elderly, working age people, children and all sections of society will be devastating.

Governments everywhere are trying to do all they can to increase the birth rate to avoid disaster, but it's not working.
Even subsaharan African countries that once had a birth rate of 5 per woman are going down to 4 and lower. It doesn't sound like much to start with but it is part of a global problem. The rate is below 0.7 children per woman in South Korea.

The only way we can solve this is by increasing the brith rate.

It's a massive toll on parents and especially women to have children and to have larger families and so people like your friend are doing a service to society.

The age gaps between her children are ideal in terms of her allowing her body to heal and re nourish between pregnancies and be able to give the maximum time and resources to each child.

We need more people like your friend to avert the coming disaster. You should be very proud of her and if you can at all manage it, emulate this reproductively for the good of society.

allthatfalafel · 02/12/2024 16:07

I don't have kids either and I think it's a very weird thing to want to garner opinions on. I can't imagine being remotely interested.

Although I do think it's funny that one of my school friends who got pregnant at 16 was posting all those memes about "it's great to have kids young because when you're in your 30s with night feeds I'll be out on the town" and is now pregnant again in her late 30s.

Original poster
Jumell · 02/12/2024 15:58

GoldsolesLugs · 02/12/2024 15:54

Finally OP gets what she wants!

She is and will always be one of my role models - she’s run marathons /works hard etc etc

OP posts:
Dameruoy · 02/12/2024 15:57

Odd post, I don't understand why it matters. Personally I wouldn't want 5 children as 3 is more than enough. And I wouldn't want to have a newborn when I had a 15 year old but that's me. I'd want my own space and time that doesn't revolve around a baby or toddler eventually.

Original poster
Jumell · 02/12/2024 15:57

ISeriouslyDoubtIt · 02/12/2024 15:51

Why on earth would she have so many children let alone another one if she has a low income? Are they funding their life themselves or relying on benefits to support an unnecessarily large family?

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Husband works full time - no benefits but at end of week they’ve nothing to spare

OP posts:
MintTwirl · 02/12/2024 15:56

BINGO

GoldsolesLugs · 02/12/2024 15:54

Finally OP gets what she wants!

Hankunamatata · 02/12/2024 15:54

Personally I think she's insane spending 18 to 34 being pregnant or having young children. Feel a bit sorry for the oldest teen as they probably don't get much 1:1 time

ISeriouslyDoubtIt · 02/12/2024 15:51

Jumell · 02/12/2024 15:41

No - sadly is not at all well off

certainly no 6 bed house

all same father

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Why on earth would she have so many children let alone another one if she has a low income? Are they funding their life themselves or relying on benefits to support an unnecessarily large family?

GoldsolesLugs · 02/12/2024 15:48

Jumell · 02/12/2024 15:46

Come on now !! I don’t think that AT ALL

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It's really obvious. You need to learn to be a bit more subtle if you want to be low key judgey.

Original poster
Jumell · 02/12/2024 15:46

GoldsolesLugs · 02/12/2024 15:45

Ahhh, she's irresponsible. Bingo!

Edited
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Come on now !! I don’t think that AT ALL

OP posts:
GoldsolesLugs · 02/12/2024 15:45

Jumell · 02/12/2024 15:41

No - sadly is not at all well off

certainly no 6 bed house

all same father

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Ahhh, she's irresponsible. Bingo!

MintTwirl · 02/12/2024 15:44

This post feels weird but I’m biting. My sibling has a similar range with 5dc although they are older now and the youngest is coming up to 14, the older two have started their own families, It’s fine, it worked for them and their circumstances.

Original poster
Jumell · 02/12/2024 15:41

ISeriouslyDoubtIt · 02/12/2024 15:35

I think 4 children would be hard enough, let alone 5. I assume she is very well off and lives in at least a 6 bedroom house to be able to house that number of children?
Do all the children have the same father? Asking because there's a large gap between first and second, and fairly large between second and third.

No - sadly is not at all well off

certainly no 6 bed house

all same father

OP posts:
loropianalover · 02/12/2024 15:39

Sounds busy and tiring but exciting. I often wonder what a big family would be like as I was only 1 when my sibling was born so don’t remember it.

I imagine it’s hard to find peace and quiet, and hard to please everyone for family days out. Also hard to get everyone into the car.

My aunty and uncle had 10 years between each of theirs - so the eldest was 20 and the middle was 10 when they had the third.

Butchyrestingface · 02/12/2024 15:37

Jumell · 02/12/2024 15:31

No - why on earth would someone want to make unpleasant comments ?

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Because people DO have opinions (including unpleasant ones) on all manner of things and some are not shy to express them. Especially when it comes to women and motherhood.

And it would provide some context on why you've started this strange and random thread.

ISeriouslyDoubtIt · 02/12/2024 15:35

I think 4 children would be hard enough, let alone 5. I assume she is very well off and lives in at least a 6 bedroom house to be able to house that number of children?
Do all the children have the same father? Asking because there's a large gap between first and second, and fairly large between second and third.

Original poster
Jumell · 02/12/2024 15:34

competitiveclasswarriorheretotellyouyourewrong · 02/12/2024 15:32

So why do you care?

Why didn't you ask what my favourite colour of lightbulb is?

There are a billion pointless questions you could ask, why are you invested in this one?

Just interested in how this kind of age spread is perceived

I think it’s lovely

OP posts:
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