To be so upset I’m missing my child’s nativity?

Of course YANBU to be upset.

Is there not a colleague who would swap their PPA with you ? So you approach the head with a solution rather than a problem ? That's what has happened in schools I've worked in.

That's so rude to everyone else in the same situation

That’s not true. I’ve used it for an afternoon.

No employer has any way to police that.

Look; you were just wrong. Stop going on about it.

You have to take it in whole weeks unless your child has a disability

To be taken when it's convenient for the employer basically. Which in teaching is the holidays. So no use at all.

Good point. Does that help OP? You get the actual christmas day off

I used Parental Leave for this exact reason. I’ve been a parent and teacher for over twenty years and am sick of missing everything. The last few years, at least once a year I use an afternoon of parental leave to attend something of my children’s. My boss reminded me that you are required to give 21 days notice but we all know that no school gives 21 days notice of a performance.
Edited to add that I’ve taken an afternoon each time, not a week.

They can choose it for whatever they want for their child. Not 1 nativity and then the rest of the week off by themselves with no benefit for the child whatsoever

I would have taken missing every play every parent evening and every sports day to be able to have all of the school holidays with my child.

No need to be rude to @BIWI OP. They were trying to make the point that no lasting damage will be done to your child.

My children’s school had evening performances, so I could go to those.

I’ve been to pre school and school performances as a grandparent, when parents couldn’t go. Not the same, but better than nothing.

It’s just the way it is very often in teaching.

Call in sick and if they ask for the reason /return to work conversation cite diarrhoea.

You might as well just announce you are using your sick leave to go to a nativity, that you had already been turned down for, as do this. If your schools aren’t 30 miles apart (and even then) word would have got back to your school before you have.

There are a lot of jobs that aren't teaching that can't facilitate people taking time of for Nativities etc.

The teachers always sooth the parents by saying the children don't really mind and that it shows how confident they are to perform with no parent there and it builds resilience etc etc.

Then you find teachers talking about pulling Sickies and leaving teaching because they can't go to their own child's Nativity.

The school I’m in at the moment is doing 1 afternoon performance.
Just one if you can’t make it you can’t make it - there has been quite a backlash from separated parents who can’t go together be in the same room.

Most schools do at least one "evening" performance these days.

No chance of that?

Yes and you would think a school of all places would value the experiences and wellbeing of children!

I’m a nurse so usually managed to get time off in the week for things like this BUT missed out on weekend and bank holiday stuff. Sometimes I was very sad and disappointed but this is the job I chose. In your position I’d be disappointed and frustrated that my manager was so inflexible.
Perhaps arrange to take your dc out for a little treat after school so they can tell you all about it. Not the same I know but sometimes we have to focus on what we can do not what we can’t.

Yeah I know, it's shit - I had my kids in the 80s and I never saw a nativity in the infants because they were during the day. The juniors had theirs in the evening so I saw those - but I really missed seeing them when they were 4 and 5. Fortunately we had grandparents relatively locally so they went instead and the kids didn't feel left out. Also in those days they did used to do a video (I know they can't now - and for good reasons).

Exactly. Ridiculous idea.

Yes this is true no school is perfect and your overall work life balance is hugely important to your children.

However I do think these things are quite indicative of how how much a school values staff wellbeing and how supportive they are with other stuff.

There will be many working parents missing the nativity and very many other day time events over the years. Most parents can't go to everything.

I was always thankful that our primary school had an evening nativity.

It is rubbish isn’t it. I think head teachers say no because then non-parents start with the “well am I allowed a half day?”… this is what happened in my school anyway. A few years ago our head made allowances for things like this, but then put a stop to it as it was causing too many issues. But now we have a new head and he has put a well-being day in place, where we are all allowed one day (or two half days) in a year to take off when we want, so we don’t have this problem anymore. I know this doesn’t help you though OP!