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AIBU?

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Original poster

Saying absolutely no way to a short Australian trip

116 replies

CapaciousMug · 01/12/2024 11:41

DHs sister moved to the Gold Coast in Australia several years ago, she and her husband have 3 kids, 4, 6 and 7. DD is our only child. She turned 3 in August and is nursery now.
This year, DHs family are coming here. We haven't decided where we will have dinner yet, as my parents are local too.
Next year DH thinks we should go to Australia over new year, fly out Boxing Day and be back in time for school/work (he's a teacher) starting back. He doesn't want to do Christmas in Australia as it won't feel Christmasy.
Now obviously I can't see the flights for next year yet but based on this years. If we flew out Boxing Day, the earliest we'd arrive is late on the 27th, but that's on a few routes, we'd fly back on the Sunday the 5th, land in the UK early Monday morning and school/work goes back Tuesday.
I think this sounds ridiculously exhausting, especially to do every other year.
I'd rather we go before Christmas as I love Australia and love visiting and want DD to get to go. DH insists Christmas in Australia just wouldn't be Christmas.

AIBU to say no as this sounds exhausting and unfair on DD. I say we either go before Christmas and spend more like 2 weeks there or we don't go!

OP posts:
cheezncrackers · 01/12/2024 11:58

YANBU. That would be an utterly brutal trip, particularly with such a young DC. I've been to Australia a couple of times and vowed last time to never fly straight there again, take three weeks and have a stopover each way. No way would I do what your DH is proposing with a 4-year-old.

Phonicshaskilledmeoff · 01/12/2024 11:58

SilverBlueRabbit · 01/12/2024 11:48

That's a bad idea. I say this as someone who lives in the UK but I am Australian. I have travelled to Oz with a 3 year old before and it was Hell On Earth. Doing it for such a short time is even more hellish.

FWIW, we are going over Christmas- we leave the 15th and we return on the 5th. But that is because the Dcs are older now (14 and 11) and better able to cope.

By the way- Christmas in Australia is still christmassy, just a different kind of christmassy and has its own enchantment. You can do the traditional Boxing day swim in decent temperatures for a start. Plus there is not alot of beat a Christmas day bbq or seafood buffet.

I went with my nearly 2 and 4 years olds. It certainly wasn’t hell either direction for us- the kids adapted better than we did. but yes, doesn’t seem worth the bother for a short trip

Cm19841 · 01/12/2024 11:57

What a waste to take a trip so far for such a short period of time. Honestly, just an irresponsible use of family money. Couldn't be with a partner like this.

NuffSaidSam · 01/12/2024 11:55

CapaciousMug · 01/12/2024 11:51

I think DH struggles to believe DD will find it hard as when we went last year she was 2 and did pretty well. However the jet lag floored us all and he knows that.

He refuses to believe anything short of a full roast, carols at the local village green and bitterly cold walk after dinner can be anything close to Christmassy!

Show quote history

I agree with him. I couldn't do Christmas somewhere hot either.

I'd make a lovely new tradition of spending the summer with them and make your own traditional home-based Christmas for DD with your family based in the UK.

If you need to see each other at New Year meet somewhere in between.

Original poster
CapaciousMug · 01/12/2024 11:51

SilverBlueRabbit · 01/12/2024 11:48

That's a bad idea. I say this as someone who lives in the UK but I am Australian. I have travelled to Oz with a 3 year old before and it was Hell On Earth. Doing it for such a short time is even more hellish.

FWIW, we are going over Christmas- we leave the 15th and we return on the 5th. But that is because the Dcs are older now (14 and 11) and better able to cope.

By the way- Christmas in Australia is still christmassy, just a different kind of christmassy and has its own enchantment. You can do the traditional Boxing day swim in decent temperatures for a start. Plus there is not alot of beat a Christmas day bbq or seafood buffet.

I think DH struggles to believe DD will find it hard as when we went last year she was 2 and did pretty well. However the jet lag floored us all and he knows that.

He refuses to believe anything short of a full roast, carols at the local village green and bitterly cold walk after dinner can be anything close to Christmassy!

OP posts:
BrightYellowStar · 01/12/2024 11:49

I"ve flown to Australia several times and your husband's suggestion is ludicrous. It will take you days to adjust to the new time zone (going there and on your return) and will be horrendous disruption for your 3 year old.

Absolutely no way I'd consider this.

As a PP mentioned it makes much more sense to go in the summer.

As a side note, I have spent Christmas day in Australia having a BBQ on the beach and whilst pleasant it really didn't feel like Christmas at all.

jeaux90 · 01/12/2024 11:49

OP I'll do the US for work a lot, happy with a 4 day round trip etc

But Aus for a week with a 3yo nope. Madness.

Original poster
CapaciousMug · 01/12/2024 11:48

Just to clarify this isn't about going at Christmas over Easter or Summer. I'm sure we will go at those times too.
This is for a regular every other year trip to spend Christmas and or New year with them.
Either way we will go at Christmas it's just is it over Christmas Day itself or after Christmas.

OP posts:
SilverBlueRabbit · 01/12/2024 11:48

That's a bad idea. I say this as someone who lives in the UK but I am Australian. I have travelled to Oz with a 3 year old before and it was Hell On Earth. Doing it for such a short time is even more hellish.

FWIW, we are going over Christmas- we leave the 15th and we return on the 5th. But that is because the Dcs are older now (14 and 11) and better able to cope.

By the way- Christmas in Australia is still christmassy, just a different kind of christmassy and has its own enchantment. You can do the traditional Boxing day swim in decent temperatures for a start. Plus there is not alot of beat a Christmas day bbq or seafood buffet.

Dotto · 01/12/2024 11:48

YANBU. It's so fucking selfish when family move so far away and someone expects you to visit often. Refuse such a ridiculous trip.

chollysawcutt · 01/12/2024 11:47

it won't feel Christmasy.

Ha. Is he 5? Is he worried Santa won't find him?

Doje · 01/12/2024 11:46

Go at Easter, it's a good time to get time off school and the weather is good.

Definitely not what he is proposing!

Hols23 · 01/12/2024 11:45

YANBU. Christmas is a great time to go but go for the whole Christmas holidays not just a few days.

Didimum · 01/12/2024 11:45

It’s over a week/almost 10 days out there. You’re entitled to have any preferences you like over trips, but I don’t see the issue with ‘exhaustion’, to be honest.

dulciede · 01/12/2024 11:43

Is he on glue?

YANBU.

NuffSaidSam · 01/12/2024 11:43

YANBU

Go in the summer holidays when you can have a chunk of time out there.

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