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AIBU?

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Original poster

To not buy Christmas presents for DC

112 replies

mostlylovinglife · 01/12/2024 07:55

Paid for school trips costing over £3000 for my DC next year, both aged 14 & 16. They asked for these instead of Christmas/birthday presents. I will get them their usual PJs and a selection box instead of a stocking which usually costs me £50 plus each, but can't help feeling really mean and worried they'll be devastated Christmas morning when they don't have a pile of presents to open.

I want to get them a charm each for their bracelets as something to open, but AIBU not to buy more?

OP posts:
InSpainTheRain · 01/12/2024 09:11

As long as you make it clear well in advance it should be fine. I'd also get some a few things for them to open, but not expensive things. Presents for the trip is a good idea, as you'll have to buy those anyway.

Colourblinds · 01/12/2024 09:11

Surely you can get more than pjs & a selection box for £50 plus?

hazelnutvanillalatte · 01/12/2024 09:10

That's fine, I would just do a stocking each filled with little festive items like lip balms/socks/chocolate and the trips can be the big present

WilfredsPies · 01/12/2024 08:52

It’s completely reasonable not to buy anything else. But I’d remind them if I were you. Just in case they’ve forgotten that they’d asked for this and so they understand that there will be no big pile of presents. It just manages expectations and avoids any upset on Christmas morning.

eakjoy · 01/12/2024 08:24

If you can't afford to do both and the kids were informed then no it's fine. As someone else said I'd buy and wrap things they'll need for the trips. I couldn't not do a few things to open.

SauvignonBlonk · 01/12/2024 08:14

I think you’re being completely reasonable.
They’ve both asked for the trip for Christmas and they’re both lucky to have got it.
Just a few bits and pieces to open on Christmas morning in their stocking sounds good to me.
DD asked for concert tickets rather than presents this year - she’s got those and the bits I’d already bought her. She’s 12.

Bertielong3 · 01/12/2024 08:02

This reply has been withdrawn

This message has been withdrawn at the poster's request

Needmorelego · 01/12/2024 08:01

Still do a stocking but for less money. Depends what they are into but I usually spend about £25 for my daughter. It's mostly things like bubble bath, jewellery making sets, cute socks, novelties (this year is a Hello Kitty rubix cube), stationary etc.
I usually go to Primark and get it all there !

FelicityBennett · 01/12/2024 08:00

Not at all, they know that they’re going on expensive school trips. Same in this house and same ages , both going on expensive school trips .
I’ve got PJs and some bits they needed anyway( socks etc ) but will also put some things they love but we’ve cut back on this year like a box of Diet Coke or similar so will look a bit more than just PJs ! But otherwise both know will be no big presents.
Yanbu

NeedSomeComfy · 01/12/2024 07:59

You are not being mean. They are easily old enough to make choices and understand the consequences, and their choice was to go on an amazing school trip and not have lots of presents. I'd have thought they were getting a bit old for 'a pile of presents under the tree' anyway - surely teen presents are often small (even if expensive!).
Why don't you print out an amazing picture of the place they'll be going on the school trip and put that in a card for them to open, just to be a reminder of what they are getting as a present.

TwinklyAmberOrca · 01/12/2024 07:58

Yanbu!

£3000 for school trips is a huge amount and very privileged so they'll understand.

Maybe just buy them a token gift of something to play with like a tamagotchi? £13 so cheaper than a charm!

Landlubber2019 · 01/12/2024 07:58

We did similar last year, the presents they did open were largely items required for the school trip.

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