To be unsure how to manage situations like this

OP. He.might he 4 next month but he is still three.

Does he have any concept of what an apology is?

Have you explained any of this to him in child friendly terms? Why we look out for other people? What an apology is? Why people apologise?

Or are you just interrupting his fun to make him say, "I'm sorry," to a stranger without any concept of what those words mean or why he is saying them? What it means?

As someome else said, at this age, you have to teach them to be aware of other people and their surroundings and model the thinking around this for him so he knows what to do. And he will forget and it will happen again and it will take a long time for him to get it but that's what parenting is.

Exactly this. Narrating loudly also lets people around you know you are in control and actively parenting. Heads off some of the frowns and dirty looks when DS inevitably acts 4

I walk with a stick and sometimes young children do get really excited and knock into me. I generally feel it is on me to be aware that they are there too, especially at crowded places, or where the children might be overly excited, though sometimes there's nowhere for me to get out of the way in time.

I'm never cross with the children but I do sometimes get a bit fed up with the adults with them if they aren't watching them or keeping an eye on what they are doing. Generally though accidents happen. I'm not going to sit at home just in case and I don't expect children not to be children either.

I will say though that I'm not elderly, and I might not feel the same in 25 years time!

it’s also typical of being a child. Shall we stop trying to diagnose autism from one bloody sentence

He's not old enough to be super aware of his surroundings so you need to do it for him. "There's not enough room for you to do that here, let's find a big space" before he bumps into someone

When you say you try to get him to apologize - he could be confused or overwhelmed or upset or a bit oblivious at that age.

It's more important that you apologize yourself - he's three and wouldn't be out unsupervised.

Think about how you talk to him or model apologies when he's not in a sudden encounter with a stranger - role play it a bit. Show him that apologizing doesn't mean he will be blamed, and that it's a nice thing to do if someone is hurt or inconvenienced.

You wouldn't expect him to spot this kind of risk at three. Give it another three years at least before you worry about this.

You need to be keeping an eye on where he is going at that age and guiding him. "watch where you're going there is a lady in front of you be careful you don't bump in to her" if he gets closer you move him away. If he does bump in to someone you apologise to the person sincerely first then to him "oops you bumped into the person, let's say sorry" and don't make a big drama of it to him when he's little.

I think some kids do need lots of reminding to watch out for other people.

Normal at age 4, but you need to be keeping an eye on him

Fairly normal 4yo behaviour.

The elderly lady gets profusely apologised to by you, and the glow stick gets taken away until he also apologises. If he refuses/keeps waving it annoyingly, it gets taken away again and only you get to wave it till he learns the lesson.

That sounds like an accident and very age appropriate for a 4 year old. Hate to say it and not being mean but it's up to you as the parent to assess his surroundings and make sure he's not waving it around where people could get hurt?

So he's 3?

He's three.

Its your job to teach him. Three year olds are oblivious in this way.

I used to sort of narrate our surroundings to give my kids a heads up of what to look out for. At 4, they don't necessarily understand that other people aren't as steady on their feet and they need a lot of coaching to help them assess their surroundings.

So there’s no consequence for his bad behaviour? This isn’t going to end well.

How old is he? Sounds quite typical of autism.. any other traits?

How old is he? And does he acknowledge when he knocks into people and apologise?