To think DH did nothing wrong here?

I feel so sad that good men like your husband are becoming discouraged from helping. There is something wonderful about a human being that will go out of their way to help another human being for no reason other than they need help. No reward, no fanfare.

I understand why she felt jittery, breaking down and dealing with that is stressful. However she wasn't thinking about her safety at all, nor the safety of others. You, and in turn your husband, were.

You, and he, may well have saved lives last night. I hope that once the Police understood what your husband's intentions were they were grateful they weren't attending a serious accident.

Tell your husband how proud you are of him putting himself out to help someone. Maybe, just maybe in the cold light of day the woman will think it over and realise what a dangerous position she was in.

If course dearest I bought my PhD ofd Amazon 🤣🤣🤣

It is perfectly possible for her to have been both stupid and for her to be scared of being approached in the dark by a random bloke. She had no way of knowing if he was a good guy or an axe wielding maniac.

I have broken down on a bend before. The first thing I did, before phoning for recovery, was to call the police. They were with me in minutes to prevent any further issues. The sensible thing for the husband to do when told he wasn't needed would have been to suggest calling the police, or offered to do it for her, not lurk down the road, further adding to the hazards of the situation and inadvertently scaring a lone woman.

How would him sitting in her car with her prevent someone running into the back of her car?

The vitriol on this thread is quite shocking.

of course you might be right she may have been being stupid and OPs DH a saint,

however given that the woman reported to the police that she was frightened AND they bothered to pay OPs DH a visit and didn’t say ‘don’t be stupid woman you were causing a hazard and the nice man tried to help’ isn’t it possible that there was rather more nuance in the situation than the OP has given us?

It’s a pity you and your DH couldn’t have both offered help - or you could have waited and your DH continued the school run.

it’s tough for your DH to be suspected when he’s a good man, but this is the cost of male violence. Women are not wrong to be very very careful.

And we know that men have used the excuse of “Let me help you” to attack women.

Instead of resenting this woman, can you and your DH think about what he could do to encourage other men to behave better? He can do little things like calling out mates who say disrespectful things. If you have boys, raise them to call out sexist behaviour as well.

Endemic male violence is tough on the good men but they should not be resentful. They need to understand why women feel threatened and suspicious. Women are acting rationally in the light of our experiences.

So much of this post is confusing.

If your house was only "just around the bend" why didn't your husband walk there to speak to the woman?

If you'd just left the house to do the school run, and the woman was so close, why were you going so fast on a bendy road that you may have "slammed in to her"?

If the road is bendy, and narrow enough to require passing spaces, how can it be a 60mph road?

We're all the electrics on the woman's car dead so that she couldn't even put her own hazards on?

That is good advice sometimes but breakdown helplines do occasionally advise people to stay in the car if it is dark, poor weather conditions or would be more risky to move than to stay put. She may have been given this advice.

He didn’t

But how would this have helped with the road obstruction? How would her leaving her car to stand on your driveway helped the road obstruction either?

The fact of the matter is that a strange man approached her on a dark, rural road when her car had broken down and did not leave her alone when she asked him to. She had already done everything she could do to fix the situation. By that point he will have seen what she looked like and gotten her license plate number. That is a dangerous situation for a woman to be in. I would have called the police too.

He sounds awesome. Did nothing wrong. As for people who won't help, cowards. What a shit world we're in if we can't find the decency to help someone.

He did nothing wrong. I think it shows just how fearful some women are because of the actions of a very small minority of men.

Your husband is lovely. The woman is not.

I've worked it out now but it's really not clear at all. That part is super badly written.

But OP I don't think your DH was being unreasonable, I think this woman has transferred the stress and anxiety of this situation onto him, and I'm sorry he's been made to feel bad when he was trying to help.

I apologise. I really try not to correct other people's language but "ver batum" is a step too far.
In case you don't know it's one word verbatim. The common meaning is "quoted". Though there are some slightly different meanings. Sorry but it was driving me up the wall that nobody commented on that. @Marblesbackagain
And it's pedalled unless you thought they were selling stolen items or drugs,
Phew. I feel better now. Sorry to all the non language pedants out there (i.e. normal people). Cheers . And yes you can begin a sentence with "And".
Hope that's cleared everything up.

He offered to wait in his car, with his hazard lights on while she was still in her car. Vehicle recovery had already been called, the OP and her DH were concerned for the safety of both the driver and the other road users during the wait. Just read the thread.

This thread is insane.

Your DH did a kind thing, but something in his delivery didn’t land and the lady felt unsafe. She done the right thing calling the police, and they done the right thing checking it all out.

You, or your husband could’ve called the police or encouraged the lady to if you felt there was a risk to life.

It was creepy but well intended for your husband to sit round the corner against her wishes. He could’ve been less creepy by explaining his actions to her, or respecting her autonomy as an adult woman and simply reporting the hazard to the police.

This whole situation has become a something from nothing. Nobody did anything fundamentally wrong. Intent impact gap springs to mind.

Yabu. Why didn’t you sit with her. I wouldn’t have appreciated that either. I don’t need a random man coming to my aid.

Knowing what to do in a breakdown is part of being a safe driver. She should have tried to get her car off the road or further from the bend, or at least put her hazard lights on.

Either you should have stopped and helped or he should have offered help which didn’t involve being in the same car. He could have called the police while with her to ask for help what with being on a blind spot. He just needs to be a bit more thoughtful with the type of help offered. No woman knows he’s safe.

Your husband may have prevented a crash. That's the most important thing.

If you have an aversion to sarcasm, please be aware I'm using it and ignore my post.

I had to stop reading not too far in.

FFS.

Yes. OMG, yes.

OP's DH was so in the wrong here, the unbelievably stupid bastard.

Fancy this pair of dozy twats being worried their neighbours would plough into this poor lone lady with their car full of kids at school pick up time. Should of let her die and take some stranger's family with her.

Of course, he should have minded his own penis owning pervert business and let his neighbours drive their kids into the back of this understandably petrified lady sitting in her dark car on a dark road round a blind bend with her lights off. After all, it his her right to to kill a car full of people cos "men". After all, every single one of them are rapists who will assault you always. They're even dangerous from round the corner in their own car. Being in separate locked metal boxes can't stop them dicks.

Offering to help was the right, and a nice, thing to do. When it was declined, waiting around the (blind) corner with hazards on to alert other motorists was, again, a very thoughtful thing to do.

I guess she was genuinely scared but that doesn't mean OP's DH did anything wrong - he absolutely did not, and his actions may have been life-saving.

She was clearly a fucking idiot if she thought it was a good idea to sit just around a blind corner on a high speed road, in the dark in a black car.

Exactly that isn’t her decision to make.
She was parked very dangerously

I wonder if she reported OPs dh because she was worried he might report her first 🤔