All these issues with schools!

@EvangelicalAboutButteredToast I'd rephrase it as wholly inadequate. Some minor flimsy accomodations by one understanding teacher does in my view make a difference for my son. It's not enough but it's something.

I genuinely think with the behaviour in schools getting so bad or children struggling to get in or being already behind when they start or so many children presenting with SEN that the future looks quite troubling. I’m not sure how society is going to function.

They were insisting on us either going to the gp or taking dd in to them to verify things like high temperatures , d and v and on one occasion period pain (dd has endo) . The gp wouldn’t give appts to verify for school as there was no clinical need for an appointment and dd was too unwell to go in and really what were they expecting as verification of d and v for example???? Diarrhoea in the reception?!!!! So for those it became our word against theirs and we got to 8 unauthorised sessions (the limit is 10) so we thought its just better for everyone to stop it all before it gets to the court stage

You’re only going to see the whingeing here. No one posts DC had a completely fine / slightly dull / good day today / likes their teacher etc.

The posts you see aren’t representative at all.

I don't think it's reasonable to expect parents never to complain about anything as long as it's done in a respectful way.

I think I had undiagnosed sen in primary school and was treated terribly by my teachers in the 90's. My child is very much like me and on a pathway to diagnosis, and I've had to raise one or two things with school over the years to advocate for him. Usually these things happen within the first half term of a new school year, which shows that the teacher just needs time to understand him in my opinion.

Children had sen years ago, they were just screamed at for not paying attention (me) and things have definitely progressed for the better.

I think its because parents are less inclined to tolerate bs from schools than they were in my time. We had some absolutely awful teachers but most parents didn't want to create a fuss so said nothing. Thankfully I believe that day is gone and parents will speak up for their children

@Theunamedcat spot on.

And to add to this, the focus is now heavily upon attendance ( smoke and mirrors in other words). We will now punish you for your child being unable to cope and not come into school that they can't cope with.

Of course parents will be up in arms. But I understand the teachers themselves are in a very difficult position with all this.

@Absolutefrustration I would have seen them in court for the non-payment of those fines - if indeed they were ever brave enough to bill them! If you'd got medical evidence then surely they'd have been laughed out of court.

The recruitment figures speak for themselves. I’ve definitely witnessed a decrease in resilience amongst students due to this attitude of ‘my mum says I don’t have to do the detention’ etc. For some, it’s a case of if they perform well, it’s in spite of you and if they do badly, it’s because of you. There are lots of lovely students but unfortunately the noisy minority and their parents get all the attention. I seriously think a decline in literacy standards is to blame for lots of behaviour issues too and the fact that teens aren’t reading as much plus social media means they struggle to concentrate and play up.

When I was a child we had several sen schools if you had "behaviour issues" you were sent there sometimes just for support one child went there because his parents were getting a divorce and he was coping poorly so he spent about 18 months in a supportive environment then was put back in mainstream speech and language? Put there and then back in mainstream if you needed to be kept there you were but some just went for the extra help they closed the school with no further provision in the area and suddenly parents are complaining about the "increase" in sen students the lack of school support the "over diagnosis" of children there arnt suddenly more sen kids you CLOSED THEIR FUCKING SCHOOLS

I’ve had to this week de register my dd as the school would not authorise absences for illness unless we took her there for them to assess. This was despite dd consultant writing to them . The thought they were better placed to assess her health . They threatened fines so we had no choice

It's pretty much always been like this on Mumsnet, but I think the moaning and complaining has got worse of late.

And that's from both parents and teachers posting on here.

People don't start threads saying:

I'm happy with my child's school, their teacher is nice/competent, they have good friends in the class, are learning lots of new things. Nothing to report.

Do they?

I wouldn’t say there s no support. There is support but much of the need is complex.

Completely accurate. My friend is a TA from a school in the next town and tells me her school has a much higher ratio.

I think that the problem is that parents are too involved in their children's lives. How often do we see threads here about children's friendships or adult children and their lives. Kids are not allowed to be independent or grow resilience so are unable to deal with anything negative in their lives.

For example, there is a thread now about a child's locker being changed. I wouldn't have even told my parents about something like that, even if it did annoy me. The child in question "doesn't cope with change" well good luck in the modern workplace then.

SEN is also an issue, why are so many kids classed as being in need of help. I went to pretty poor performing primary and secondary schools, but there were only 3 kids in my class of 32 in primary who would fall into that category. In secondary there was only one out of 30

This is in my view a huge part of the problem. My child is ND. He can see it in others. When he tells me about kids throwing tables etc it's apparent it's those needing support most the time.

I feel for these kids immensely. I feel for the teachers dumped with kids they are not adequately equipped or supported to teach. This problem is immense and people don't realise how awful it is out there. SEN parents are on their knees.

The kids that throw tables etc are not necessarily bad from bad homes. They often can't cope with what mainstream expects. There is no support there. These kids are often forced to confirm in ways that are incredibly difficult. Parent's are fobbed off then they get angry with the teachers who are themselves overwhelmed.

Significant SEN support/resources would in my view make quite a difference.
Actually banning phones. They lock them away but in my son's school they over ride the locks. Pointless. But you'll get a detention for socks of the wrong colour.

Heads have had their responsibility taken from them.

When I started teaching if a child threatened a teacher or assaulted a teacher it was instant suspension then, usually, expulsion.

Poor behaviour led to exclusion, forcing parents to take some responsibility for their feral kids.

Plenty of schools for children with special needs where they could be met by low staff ratios and plenty of support.

If this is true then we need more resources to deal with this.

Those resources obviously have to come from somewhere so it might mean reducing resources in other areas.

I'm not sure how you deal with this fairly as clearly different children's needs will conflict, but we need a system that can deal with the demographic going to school. It sounds like there is not enough provision for SEN.

I think this is incredibly accurate. In some ways it's a good thing. In many ways it's a negative.

Fir example, in my day we had to sort things out ourselves. There are positives to that. But people also came out of this significantly impacted by abuse from teachers and /or pupils that a more involved parent should have helped with.

SEN kids are having a nightmare in school. But I think their teachers are too. I try not blame the schools or the teachers in it. The system is rotten. The Government/s are responsible for this.

25% of children at my child’s school have SEN.

It also has nothing to do with the question the OP asked.

Helicopter parenting. Half the time it's the parents who have the issues, not the kids, but they make out it's the kids being upset.