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DH pisses around toilet

263 replies

PissoirPissedOff · 28/11/2024 21:20

We moved into our new home and the first thing I did was to clean the bathroom, including disinfecting the toilet area which was covered in mouldy spots. Within about an hour, DH had pissed all over the rim of the toilet and the floor just under the toilet had a small puddle of piss. I have asked him not to do this, just to wipe it dry when he misses the bowl. He says this is not his job.

I'm not particularly OCD about this sort of thing, I just like a clean bathroom and would prefer to clean it just once a week rather than daily/hourly.

I AM being unreasonable = This is beyond the scope of what is expected of a normal male in his own home.

I am NOT being unreasonable = Why can't he just make that small effort (quick wipe with tissues) so that I don't have to clean the toilet every day, and to save me getting my toes wet in a puddle of his piss?

OP posts:
Onlycoffee · 28/11/2024 23:06

PissoirPissedOff · 28/11/2024 22:35

Because it's what men do, apparently....?!?!!

Men leave their piss for women to clean up? Wtf??
He's not a little boy at home with his mother anymore.
Does he not hear how childish, unfair and misogynistic this sounds?

Snugglemonkey · 28/11/2024 23:05

PissoirPissedOff · 28/11/2024 22:38

He knows I clean the bathroom once a week and doesn't see why it can't wait until then.

So he thinks you should clean his piss. Week old piss. Show him this thread. He is a misogynistic pig.

Rosesanddaffs · 28/11/2024 23:04

@PissoirPissedOff sounds like he needs to be toilet trained. Buy him a book that explains in pictures that wee goes inside the toilet, not around or outside it.

RampantIvy · 28/11/2024 23:04

Use his favourite T-shirt as a floor mat by the loo?

Pipconkermash · 28/11/2024 23:03

PissoirPissedOff · 28/11/2024 22:52

We used to live somewhere that he pissed off the balcony into a forest. Quite honestly, I've just realised, I think he's adapting to living indoors! I'll show him this thread in the morning. Fingers crossed 🤞

Actually, I’m more horrified at the excuses you’re making for the scumbag you’re married to.

PissoirPissedOff · 28/11/2024 23:02

fashionqueen0123 · 28/11/2024 22:56

What?!? Why?

Well, sort of why not, when you're living in the middle of nowhere. But an indoor space is a different story. At least, it is to ME!

OP posts:
Pinkissmart · 28/11/2024 23:02

Omg- OP’s partner is a raccoon

Pipconkermash · 28/11/2024 23:01

I have asked him not to do this, just to wipe it dry when he misses the bowl. He says this is not his job.

Not his job? Not his fucking job? I’m horrified.

You don’t have to put up with that sort of bullshit. My god. I want to rub his fucking nose in it. He’s an utter prick.

Kibble29 · 28/11/2024 23:00

“Quite honestly, I've just realised, I think he's adapting to living indoors!”

Fucking. Hell.

I’ve seen some ridiculous excuses on here but that takes the biscuit. He’s a fully grown man, not a wild animal.

A lifetime of bowing down awaits you. 🙄

Ihatelittlefriendsusan · 28/11/2024 23:00

Quite frankly your DH is an arsehole. Not to mention a dirty bastard.

As for the not his job comment...fml that would see my DH served with divorce papers.

What a lazy low life he is.

Have some respect op and kick the twat out.

mommatoone · 28/11/2024 22:58

'Not his Job' oh, he must think the piss fairy comes down to sort it. He sounds awful.

mommatoone · 28/11/2024 22:57

'Not his Job' oh, he must think the piss fairy comes down to sort it. He sounds awful.

Motnight · 28/11/2024 22:57

PissoirPissedOff · 28/11/2024 22:52

We used to live somewhere that he pissed off the balcony into a forest. Quite honestly, I've just realised, I think he's adapting to living indoors! I'll show him this thread in the morning. Fingers crossed 🤞

And they all lived happily ever after 🙄

hoxtonbabe · 28/11/2024 22:56

fashionqueen0123 · 28/11/2024 22:56

What?!? Why?

This thread is the gift that keeps on giving 🤣

fashionqueen0123 · 28/11/2024 22:56

PissoirPissedOff · 28/11/2024 22:52

We used to live somewhere that he pissed off the balcony into a forest. Quite honestly, I've just realised, I think he's adapting to living indoors! I'll show him this thread in the morning. Fingers crossed 🤞

What?!? Why?

sweetpickle2 · 28/11/2024 22:55

I know people are quick to jump to LTB on here but I would genuinely divorce him over this.

At the very least there’s no way I’d be able to have sex with someone who did something so gross and treated me with such little respect.

thequeenoftarts · 28/11/2024 22:54

Title: Sit Down, Buddy

(Verse 1)
He’s a grown man, but he can’t seem to see,
Left the toilet seat wet like it’s a mystery.
Mom never taught him how to clean up right,
Now we’ve got a bathroom mess every night.

(Chorus)
Oh buddy, you gotta sit down—
Lift that lid without lettin’ it drown!
Wipe it up before you go away,
Don’t leave that wet mark for another day!

(Verse 2)
Small in size but big on fuss,
When he takes aim it's just not his plus.
But standing's not an option; it's all outta reach—
So why can't he learn from this little speech?

(Chorus)
Oh buddy, you gotta sit down—
Lift that lid without lettin’ it drown!
Wipe it up before you walk away,
Don’t leave that wet mark for another day!

(Bridge)
It ain’t hard; just grab some paper roll—
A quick little swipe is good for the soul!
No need to be messy when you're doing your thing;
Respect the loo and let cleanliness sing.

(Outro)
So come on now and take heed of my song —
Time to grow up; let’s right this wrong!
With a simple act of kindness – oh so sweet,
You’ll make the throne fresh for everyone who seats!


Hope you enjoy this light-hearted tune!
Copy
×
"Toilet Seat Blues"

(Verse 1)
In a little old house, on a Saturday night,
There’s a guy named Dave, he just can’t do right.
He walks in the bathroom with a confident stride,
But when it comes to aiming, he’s got nothing inside.

(Chorus)
Oh, small penis blues and pissing on the seat,
Mama never taught him how to clean up his defeat.
When you gotta sit down and take care of business fast,
At least wipe that seat down before you leave at last!

(Verse 2)
He's got the throne all to himself tonight,
But every little drop turns into such a plight.
With no tissue handy and his aim so poor,
Every time he stands up there's puddles on the floor.

(Chorus)
Oh, small penis blues and pissing on the seat,
Mama never taught him how to clean up his defeat.
When you gotta sit down and take care of business fast,
At least wipe that seat down before you leave at last!

(Bridge)
Sitting like a champ but making quite a mess —
Dave's proud of what he's got but it gets worse than less.
“It's not my fault,” he says with laughter in his tone;
But even kings must tidy up their very own throne!

(Verse 3)
Now friends come around for beers and good cheer;
They see toilet troubles—what really brings fear—
“Dude!” they shout out as they enter this scene:
“No one should have peeing woes so obscene!”

(Chorus)
Oh, small penis blues and pissing on the seat,
Mama never taught him how to clean up his defeat.
When you gotta sit down and take care of business fast,
At least wipe that seat down before you leave at last!

(Outro)
So raise your glass high if you're feeling me too,
Let’s help our friend Dave find some cleaning crew.
A small lesson learned while sharing these tunes —
Keep your throne nice ’n’ tidy or you'll face doom 'neath full moons!

WineIsMyMainVice · 28/11/2024 22:54

Dotto · 28/11/2024 22:39

He's a thick, disgusting pig. And what are you going to do about this?

So if he’s going to do this once/twice or 3 times a day, he thinks this is a reasonable length of time to allow that a mount of piss to build up a stink/filth over a week, waiting for the weekly clean? Your bathroom is going to absolutely stink!!!
The worst part is that he still expects YOU to clean it!!! I’ve seriously heard it all now…. I pity you if you put up with this.

PissoirPissedOff · 28/11/2024 22:52

HeadacheEarthquake · 28/11/2024 22:43

Has he always done this? If so, why would you marry that

We used to live somewhere that he pissed off the balcony into a forest. Quite honestly, I've just realised, I think he's adapting to living indoors! I'll show him this thread in the morning. Fingers crossed 🤞

OP posts:
RampantIvy · 28/11/2024 22:52

This would involve using his favourite clothing as a cloth, his towel to dry everything and his toothbrush as a scrubber. I would also use his aftershave as a room freshener.

Love this Grin

gamerchick · 28/11/2024 22:51

What is with the pee threads tonight anyway?

SuchiRolls · 28/11/2024 22:51

Call his mummy and tell her she needs to come and get her toddler and clean up his piss. I’m petty so I’d prob leave something that looks like blood on the seat for him and give him the same answer he gave you when he says it’s disgusting. Unbelievable!

BreadInCaptivity · 28/11/2024 22:50

If he won't clean up after himself and thinks it's your job then my response would be either:

  • divorce
  • agree to clean his piss but the manner in which I do so would be mine to choose. This would involve using his favourite clothing as a cloth, his towel to dry everything and his toothbrush as a scrubber. I would also use his aftershave as a room freshener.
Notaurewhy · 28/11/2024 22:50

PissoirPissedOff · 28/11/2024 22:35

Because it's what men do, apparently....?!?!!

@PissoirPissedOff How long have you been together? Did he do this when he visited at your respective houses? I'm presuming that you've "dated, created a relationship and taking it to the next level and this is a new house for the 2 of you together? Or I may be wrong and you have lived together before and this is a new family home?

Radiatorvalves · 28/11/2024 22:49

I live with 3 men (well DH and 20 and 17 yo. None of them fo this. And the 17 yo is the laziest boy. Nor does my 80+ yo dad who has water works issues. He sits down.

tell DH this is NOT NORMAL. What does he do at friends’ houses? Gross.

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