Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Am I or is school BU?

108 replies

SchoolProblemHelp · 27/11/2024 23:48

Name changed for this as this situation is probably very recognisable to those who know me.

Having some issues with DD’s school at the moment and before I make a formal complaint want to know if I’m being an overprotective mum or if school is handling this wrong.

DD has Autism and Tourette’s Syndrome. Had lots of support in mainstream primary school, teacher’s aide, maths intervention as she is very behind in this, access to quiet area when overwhelmed, able to take time away when suffering tic attacks etc. All of this was provided at school monitoring level and so she has no EHCP in place and we are told she would not meet criteria for one as she was coping just fine with this support.

Went to high school this year and all of this support was withdrawn. New school say it was never a formal plan so no duty to provide it. Still claim she won’t meet EHCP level yet also don’t agree she needs school monitoring support she previously had.

Couple of recent incidents involve:

  • Being given detention for not finishing Maths work despite asking and not receiving help (we are aware she is 12 months behind in Maths and in a mixed ability class so she found this above her level).
  • Being given detention for walking out of lesson when suffering a tic attack as another child was laughing and imitating her tics back to her.
  • Being made to stand up in class and read aloud and told off for ‘being silly’ when she starting ticking due to nerves by a teacher who apparently had not been informed she has Tourette’s.
  • Being given behaviour points for ‘chewing gum’ despite it being known by the SEN team that one of her common tics is rolling her jaw as though she is chewing.
  • Being given behaviour points for ‘throwing’ a pencil that flew out of her hand when her arm ticked. And when I raised this with the school being told it is her responsibility to inform the teacher at the time that this was in fact a tic, despite this meaning having to disclose her medical history in front of the whole class including children who bully her for this.

The cumulation of the above now means she’s been put on report and has to approach each teacher in very lesson to ask them to write on her report and take it to the head of year at the end of the day. Something she is very anxious about doing as her Autism means she struggles to approach people.

Am I expecting too much of a mainstream school or should school be resolving these issues and stop punishing a child for their disability. If I could get her an EHCP and move her I would in a heartbeat but to get an EHCP you have to show that the school intervention isn’t enough and it was, in primary, but now school won’t put the support in place.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
5
JMSA · 28/11/2024 00:57

YANBU FlowersSad

Talkingfrog · 28/11/2024 00:52

You are not being unreasonable. It must feel horrible for your daughter to be given detentions for something she has no control over.

Agree with what the other responses have said.
If a child has disabilities the school have to make reasonable adjustments, which they are clearly not doing if they won't allow her to do things such as leave the room when she is having tics.

They also have a duty of care to your daughter, which it sounds as if they are not meeting, if the teachers do not know she has Tourette's and if they are allowing others to bully her due to her tics.

Things vary in name from area to area, but the senco should have some form of profile or record of her needs, which records what support they are providing and you should be able to have a copy of/comment on. Her teachers should also be made aware. They probably have a lot to remember at the start of a new year, where they are teaching pupils they may not already know, but the things you have described should be a clear reminder to them of your daughter's needs anyway.

Original poster
SchoolProblemHelp · 28/11/2024 00:37

@FluffMagnet As I have informed each teacher when issues present most of them have been mortified and apologised. Except the one that said it was her responsibility to tell them it was a tic as how can they tell the difference.

@NewName24 The info was sent from primary to secondary school and she did have an enhanced transition. That’s what makes it so annoying now. She does have an IEP in place but this is quite basic and also I have been advised by the SEN team “we can’t make the teachers read it”. I have since found out this school has a reputation for managing out SEN pupils to keep their high exam results so probably not the best school for her but all her friends are there so we really want to try and make it work.

Thank you all for reassuring me I’m not expecting too much. I KNOW schools are under funded and teachers overworked etc. and in a busy school it’s hard to look out for one pupil but it’s breaking my heart how much DD is struggling already. I’ve had a few meetings and suggested applying for funding and they keep saying she doesn’t meet criteria, because she’s not disruptive and other than in Maths she is meeting her targets. They have said the government have made it harder to get EHCP’s and only the most severe can get them now and she isn’t at that level. But surely there should be a middle ground between no support and EHCP.

My eldest child went to an SEN school and had an EHCP as he has severe learning disabilities and so this is our first experience of mainstream secondary school. Wasn’t sure what was normal. I will be sending a formal complaint in the morning!

OP posts:
Poppyseed14 · 28/11/2024 00:34

Good advice already on here OP. Another good source of support/info is the FB group called Not Fine In School.

purpleme12 · 28/11/2024 00:25

Erm wow this is quite shocking

I would absolutely make a complaint

I mean it's quite telling that the primary had all that support in surely. I'd be so mad

NewName24 · 28/11/2024 00:20

x-posted.

Absolutely agree with everything @FluffMagnet said as well.

Especially the paper trail and following up verbal conversations with e-mails.

NewName24 · 28/11/2024 00:19

School are BU here.

Whether or not a child has a diagnosis and whether or not a child has an EHCP, they ought to make necessary adjustments to meet the child's needs.

I would say the Primary school have been really unhelpful by not formalising all the additional support they have been putting in.
Even if they felt she didn't need and EHCP (and I don't know her so can't say if they are right or not on that front) they were putting in considerable support and she would therefore have individual plans in place and be on the SEN register. All that information should have gone up to the secondary school and an extended transition should have been put in place. The Primary SENCO should have met with the secondary SENCo and informed them of all the support that should have been in place.
So this isn't all the Secondary school's fault.

However what you need to do now, is ask the school for a meeting with the SENCo and whoever has pastoral oversight of her (might be Form Teacher / Head or Year / Head of House/ a Pastoral Team member - varies, school to school) and put all this to them.
Tell them of both of her diagnoses. Tell them how that presents in your dd and what she has difficulty with. Ask them how they are supporting her. Ask them what reasonable adjustments they are making under the DDA (Disability Discrimination Act). she does NOT need to have an EHCP for them to put this support in place but an EHCP does tend to highlight her difficulties and give you 'proof' of her needs.

You can apply for an EHCP. It doesn't have to be the school.
Look at IPSEA website, or contact SOS SEN for further support.

FluffMagnet · 28/11/2024 00:17

Google the Equality Act. No duty, my arse. You need to escalate your complaints and get everything in writing. Any face to face discussions, minute immediately afterwards and send as a follow email (" I drew your attention to XYZ, you said ABC and we agreed you would ensure the following actions 123 are completed.") Check out the complaints procedure now, and start escalating as soon as you are able. Your poor, poor daughter.

As an aside, if you have email addresses for each of her teachers, send an email to all explaining her disabilities and staying that to date she has been punished several times for said disabilities. I am sure they'll all be mortified and hopefully raise questions internally as to why they had not been informed of her SEN. She cannot be expected to tell each teachers on front of a class all her sensitive personal information. Failing which, a note to each from you, that she can hand in at the beginning of a lesson.

Swipe left for the next trending thread