Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

School mornings DH working from home

61 replies

barrymanilowspiano · 27/11/2024 10:43

I have agreed with my other half who works from home that I’ll deal with the last 15 mins of getting the kids out the door in the morning as I’m the one who drives them to school. We agreed he can do the breakfast/lunches or anything beforehand if he wants but it’s easier if the one driving (always me) does check bags/shoes/car. I’ve said he can then get ready for work in peace.

We agreed this last night and this morning he's at the door repeating everything I say, getting involved in their arguments, looking for stuff, whatever the last minute drama is. He even gave a speech this morning about behaviour. One of the kids needs calm and simple as he gets overwhelmed and we’ve spoken about this which is why we chatted last night. I know he’s only trying to help but we agree and then he immediately reverts. Bad moods as there are too many conversations flying around!

He says I’m blaming him when things go wrong but he can’t pass the baton for the last few minutes. Is this normal lol. Who can relate?

OP posts:
Brefugee · 27/11/2024 10:52

barrymanilowspiano · 27/11/2024 10:47

Because he is getting ready for work himself (downstairs bathroom) and he tries to do 2 things at once.

I'd have just gone to work and let him do the rest. And i would keep on doing that, just taking care of my routine, until he stops being an idiot.

Original poster
barrymanilowspiano · 27/11/2024 10:51

Exactly the same Mandylovescandy.

I'm not worried about who is doing how much etc. I'm trying to meet everyone's needs and keep it simple for DC who gets stressed about being late etc so doesn't need all of DH's nagging and talking about irrelevant stuff.

OP posts:
minipie · 27/11/2024 10:51

Can he go to his workspace, shut the door and put headphones in?

Parker231 · 27/11/2024 10:50

Leave him to do the morning routine - it’s not complicated as unless they are babies they can get themselves ready. DH did mornings and I did after school. Much less hassle than two of you getting involved.

rubyslippers · 27/11/2024 10:50

barrymanilowspiano · 27/11/2024 10:47

Because he is getting ready for work himself (downstairs bathroom) and he tries to do 2 things at once.

Then he needs to get ready earlier

Mandylovescandy · 27/11/2024 10:49

I would say bags and everything organised the night before but often I can't be arsed to follow this advice myself and so make the morning more stressful. Am getting better though

Original poster
barrymanilowspiano · 27/11/2024 10:47

Because he is getting ready for work himself (downstairs bathroom) and he tries to do 2 things at once.

OP posts:
rwalker · 27/11/2024 10:47

All seems a bit tit for tat and each one worried about doing more than the other

Mandylovescandy · 27/11/2024 10:47

Me too. We take turns but my DP can get in the way commenting that I am running late or nagging one of the DC in a way that doesn't work and is more likely to cause upset (ASD so careful approach can be essential). Sometimes it works well if we help each other but this morning I clearly said twice that I needed space to think and organise stuff and DP stood about getting in the way asking about irrelevant stuff and nagging the kids

rubyslippers · 27/11/2024 10:45

Why are two of you doing an over convoluted routine?!
why can’t he literally put them in the car with their bags packed so he does the entire routine
you doing 15 mins etc and a handover isn’t working

Original poster
barrymanilowspiano · 27/11/2024 10:44

I know there are bigger things to worry about and he's only being a good parent by trying to help out.

OP posts: