To exchange this gift/get refund?

No, he wants her to now not bother wearing her mum’s because he thinks his is better and is obsessed with how it cost a lot more. He isn’t thinking about the reasons the OP loves this necklace, or what makes her happy. He is using a gift to put himself above that because his “is better” so she should wear that regardless of the reasons she loves the one she has.

It’s not a thoughtful gift if you make someone feel bad for not wearing it, or act like they’re disloyal or like they’re choosing someone else over you. He wants her to now put her mum’s aside and wear his. That’s not a gift. That’s a guilt trip.

in this case it was a gift that represents DHs love and sympathy and he’s upset at that being rejected.

All these replies are just stupid.

Yes, it WAS a lovely caring gift when the other one was lost. But you found it before he gave this gift and he knew you never needed or wanted a replacement before. It would never be something you would want to change out for a new one so once you found it, he should have returned his one instead of still giving it to you. What’s he’s done is try to make you now choose between them. A gift is about the person receiving it, not the person giving it. He did a lovely thing when it was lost, but now that it isn’t, he needs to understand that OP doesn’t want a new one. She wants to wear the one from her mum without her husband getting huffy that she isn’t wearing his, or isn’t choosing him over her mum, or isn’t valuing his gift.

You owe ur OH an apology

I think keep both. Your mums is fragile, maybe wear for occasions you need to feel her near and wear dh necklace everyday as it’s bigger, newer and presumably more robust. I think his thinking was good. He probably is just a bit upset at his gift not going down as well but am sure he understands the sentiment behind og gift. We all would. If he doesn’t you’ve got bigger problems than which necklace to wear.

It's her attitude that's callous not the fact that she doesn't necessarily want the necklace.

This.

Your husband did a kind and thoughtful thing. I think you've been a bit thoughtless and rude. Save the sentimental one in a box.
Wear the one from your husband.
When someone goes to this kind of trouble, just appreciate it.

Poor man - he was honestly trying to do a nice thing and it is rejected.

I genuinely don't understand people who make buying a gift for someone about themselves? Surely the purpose of gift buying is to give pleasure to another person. Why would anyone want someone to keep a gift they didn't want?

Wow I agree with others no wonder he's annoyed with you. He did a really thoughtful thing and you would have most likely been posting saying how lovely it was had you not found your mum's st Christopher.

Do you honestly not see how telling him it's not wanted and you'd instead prefer a bloody lamp is rude and hurtful?

Keep the one your mum gave you in a jewelery box so you can no longer lose it or put her st Christopher on his chain and apologise to the poor bloke asap for being so thoughtless.

Your poor husband! He did such a nice thing and you've just thrown it right back in his face.

YABVU - I hope you apologise.

Your analogy with the queen makes it sound like you don’t value your husband at all. Your Mum is the Queen and you husband is…. nothing really, as unimportant as a lamp. I can understand why he is so upset. You have been thoughtless and hurtful.

OP, it's more like you lost a card from the Queen, and then it was replaced with one from the King. Your DH should be an important person to you, too, and their gift should have equal sentimental value. You sound really mean, and you need to apologise.

Yes I am on team husband too. It was very sweet of him and you just trashed it. I would keep the one my Mum bought in a safe place and wear the one from DH as an everyday peice of jewellery.

You need a new chain anyway so you may as well keep that part of the gift. Can you and your husband go together to exchange the St Christopher pendant for something new that has meaning for your marriage. Either another pendant, or a pair of earrings perhaps.
Don't ask for a lamp.

Why can't you wear both at different times?

An idiot? Wow. 🙄

💯 this.

Had you not found the one your DM gave you, this would have been such a lovely gift. I think you’re being rather thoughtless here.

I think it was a very thoughtful gift from him, even though I understand that the original is sentimental I think he was really trying to be kind. I agree with others that you could keep the original safe and wear the gift.

Have to admit I’m on team husband for this one.

He clearly bought gave you a gift of something you like and lost. Put your mum’s necklace away and pass down when the time is right and wear the one he got you because he loves you.

Or whatever buy a lamp or some slippers that you’ll throw out in a year or two.

This. Why can't you wear his every day and save the heirloom for special occasions?

I don't blame him for feeling rejected.

I completely understand you both, but I’m a complete sentimental sod so I understand the new one would never be the same as the original - in his position I’d give him a large kiss and a cuddle as a thank you but ask him to exchange his gift, and I’d hope he’d understand,

To me it’s like if you got sent a Birthday card from The Queen (the previous one) but lost it and then he buys me another Birthday card with a similar picture on the front for example, it just wouldn’t really be the same.

No, they are both thoughtful gifts from beloved family members. I think you've been really hurtful.

Wear and keep both. And say thanks.