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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Visited parents for them to make stupid jokes.

154 replies

ThePerkyCoralPoet · 26/11/2024 21:41

Visited my parents to drop dinner over. Myum
kwpt waffling about something after work and I said “how many times have we heard this now” she then turned around and nudged my dad and said “ooh look at her. She’s rude. She’s not my daughter. My daughter is supposed to have manners” at which point I got in the car and ignored her and drove back to mine. She thinks I’m being unreasonable and a brat. I however. Think what she said was rude and stupid.

Aibu?

OP posts:
Pippa12 · 26/11/2024 22:48

Good on you- sleep well, you’ll laugh about this in a few weeks. Sleep well 💐

cariadlet · 26/11/2024 22:45

ThePerkyCoralPoet · 26/11/2024 22:37

we both said sorry. I had a bad day and cried and she did say I took it in a way that it wasn’t intended. I said sorry too. Think I’ve just had a bad day.

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What a great update, OP. Wel done for going back and apologising. It's never easy to admit that you're in the wrong

I'm glad things turned out well.

Phonicshaskilledmeoff · 26/11/2024 22:45

How do you even have the energy to operate with this level of drama over absolutely fuck all. Reading your messages tired me out. Your poor mum 🤦‍♀️

mathanxiety · 26/11/2024 22:44

ThePerkyCoralPoet · 26/11/2024 21:54

You don’t turn around and say “that’s not my daughter” pathetic.

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Oh sure you do. In fact, she just did.

What would you have preferred?
Abject apologies?
Groveling for daring to waffle in your presence?

BaklavaRocks · 26/11/2024 22:42

Thanks for the update OP. Hope u r ok. All will feel better tomorrow :)

SoNiceToComeHomeTo · 26/11/2024 22:42

Hope you sleep well OP and feel better in the morning. x

CurlewKate · 26/11/2024 22:42

@ThePerkyCoralPoet "I was saying it in a sarcastic jokey way. Not in a I’m sick of you way."
So was she!

WearyAuldWumman · 26/11/2024 22:41

I'm glad you've made up. I hope that tomorrow is a better day for you.

Mygreyhair · 26/11/2024 22:41

ThePerkyCoralPoet · 26/11/2024 22:37

we both said sorry. I had a bad day and cried and she did say I took it in a way that it wasn’t intended. I said sorry too. Think I’ve just had a bad day.

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I hope tomorrow is better for you.
sleep well tonight. 🌹

Loub1987 · 26/11/2024 22:41

ThePerkyCoralPoet · 26/11/2024 22:37

we both said sorry. I had a bad day and cried and she did say I took it in a way that it wasn’t intended. I said sorry too. Think I’ve just had a bad day.

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Tomorrow is a new day, hope you have a better evening x

echt · 26/11/2024 22:40

A nice ending.

Good on you, @ThePerkyCoralPoet

pompey38 · 26/11/2024 22:39

ThePerkyCoralPoet · 26/11/2024 21:45

I was saying it in a sarcastic jokey way. Not in a I’m sick of you way. Her comment was too far.

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So was she by the sound of it

ineedsun · 26/11/2024 22:38

ThePerkyCoralPoet · 26/11/2024 22:37

we both said sorry. I had a bad day and cried and she did say I took it in a way that it wasn’t intended. I said sorry too. Think I’ve just had a bad day.

Show quote history

Hope you’re ok

Original poster
ThePerkyCoralPoet · 26/11/2024 22:37

Scentedjasmin · 26/11/2024 22:32

Honestly, you do sound like a bit of a brat OP. Hanging up on her was very rude too. You expected your mother to take your comment in the vain that you intended (even though it does come across as rude), yet you do not afford the same courtesy to your mother. I think that you owe her an apology to be honest.

we both said sorry. I had a bad day and cried and she did say I took it in a way that it wasn’t intended. I said sorry too. Think I’ve just had a bad day.

OP posts:
CustardySergeant · 26/11/2024 22:37

Onlyvisiting · 26/11/2024 21:57

You were rude, she called you on it and you threw a tantrum.
Get a grip and learn some manners.

Exactly.

Original poster
ThePerkyCoralPoet · 26/11/2024 22:33

HobbyHorse30 · 26/11/2024 22:24

One of two things is going to happen here, OP. Either you'll come back to this thread tomorrow when you've calmed down and you'll cringe at how snippy and difficult you sounded because you were angry, or you'll think that you behaved perfectly reasonably towards your mum and in your responses here, and prove all of those comments to be accurate observations of how snippy and difficult you are.

Edited

I’ve gone back to their house and I’ve said sorry. I realise I was wrong and not being very kind.

OP posts:
Scentedjasmin · 26/11/2024 22:32

Honestly, you do sound like a bit of a brat OP. Hanging up on her was very rude too. You expected your mother to take your comment in the vain that you intended (even though it does come across as rude), yet you do not afford the same courtesy to your mother. I think that you owe her an apology to be honest.

Pippa12 · 26/11/2024 22:31

It’s just a phrase OP (you use with children). I actually say to my own daughter ‘that’s not my daughter being rude, I’ve brought my daughter up better than that so it can’t be her’. I suppose it’s a passive aggressive way of saying ‘watch your bloody tongue lady Jane!’

You were rude and disrespectful to your mum; she pulled you up on it and you stropped off like a teenager. I suggest you sleep on it and reflect on the morning (which is what I suggest to my twelve year old when she acts like this).

another1bitestheduck · 26/11/2024 22:29

you were rude first but didn't think you were being rude, just making a joke
she was rude back but didn't think she was being rude, just making a joke
you then had the choice to de-escalate the situation or ramp it up and you chose b) by storming out.
so yeah, YABU

Kitkat1523 · 26/11/2024 22:28

You were in the wrong op

Loub1987 · 26/11/2024 22:26

While I’m not convinced that I fully understand the interaction, it does sound like you were quite rude and then stormed off. So YABU, in my opinion.

pimplin · 26/11/2024 22:24

Are you old enough to drive?

CheekyHobson · 26/11/2024 22:24

Pretty much every response you've given here has been rude so I think it's safe to assume you come across equally rudely in real life.

Hard to hear, I suppose.

HobbyHorse30 · 26/11/2024 22:24

One of two things is going to happen here, OP. Either you'll come back to this thread tomorrow when you've calmed down and you'll cringe at how snippy and difficult you sounded because you were angry, or you'll think that you behaved perfectly reasonably towards your mum and in your responses here, and prove all of those comments to be accurate observations of how snippy and difficult you are.

GonnaBeASuperSaver · 26/11/2024 22:23

Wow. A, you were rude first.
B, it's obviously a joke. We often joke. If I do something daft my DF will make wise cracks, good Job you're not mine , we found you in a bush. Or something equally unfunny. But it's all jokey