To wonder if my 6 year old thinks in a strange way

Your kid is smart, you were naive (as a kid). Every child is different. Nothing sad about it.

@Marblesbackagain

re-read your own posts again and note how many times you longingly mention a desire for her to embrace a “magic / magical” experience.

I could be wrong here but I think there’s something going on about your own needs for escape from reality that you’re trying to experience through your daughter, by proxy.

Have a good think and try to meet her on her ground, not feel sad or disappointed that she’s somehow not playing along with how you feel she should be and therefore spoiling your vicarious fun.

I think she’s an amazing, perceptive intelligent child. Be happy!

When my DC were little we watched a terrifying Doctor Who episode where as soon as you turned away from the monsters you forgot about them. DD1 kept asking 'why are they scared of that person wearing a silly mask'. I don't think it's anything to worry about at all, and certainly not a sign of ND on its own, some people enjoy the suspension of disbelief in 'magic', others don't. Doesn't mean their childhood is less wonderful, just that they like other things. Forget the fantasy and focus on the wonder in the natural world, she'll probably love astronomy or paleontology or microbiology. There are scientific facts that are much more wonderful than any story.

Oh, thank you!
I'm autistic and I always believed everything I was told because I didn't lie so I didn't realise other people would.

I still have trouble not taking things people say at face value. It puts you at risk of being exploited, so I think the OP's daughter is better off.

My youngest is likely ND and absolutely lives in her imagination. Completely knows it's imaginary, but has a very strong ability to suspend disbelief and enter into fantasy worlds. Loves film theory and the workings of stories.

As far as 'magic' goes... it's odd how 'the magic' (mainly meaning Santa) seems to have become an ersatz Christmas religion that so many parents seem desperate for their children to believe in.

Your daughter sounds fab, OP. I remember taking my eldest and his good friend, aged 6, to a place where there was a 'flight simulator' (one of those boxes that shakes about) simulating flying over a rainforest. Inside, the friend was really getting into the imaginary experience. My ds just said drily 'it's just a box being shaken around'. Friend is now studying theatre/drama and ds is training as a paramedic. Different personalities.

This.

Op I work in primary school. There are ND children that think like that and there are NT children that do too. That alone is not a sign of autism.

She's clearly an intelligent child. That's not sad.

When I was young in the 1960s you had to travel for miles to see Santa, and it was a treat. It was special. I don't think I believed in Santa, but i didn't not.

Now that there are Santas everywhere, mostly in horrible cheap costumes, it's not surprising that the magic has vanished. At least she and all the other kids are able to be honest.

Hi there, I just wanted to say that my DD is autistic and she completely believed in Father Christmas until she went to secondary school. I actually told her before she started Year 7 because I thought she was getting a bit old and would seem silly around her peers and she was devastated and cried a lot. She then said she still wants to believe in him and let’s just go on as we were. So, there wasn’t an ND link with us. Just adding this for some balance as your child may be ND but I wouldn’t base it on this at all. She does have a very active imagination though and played a lot of imaginary games, but this is due to her being very creative.

To be honest I don’t remember ever believing f in Santa or the tooth fairy. I knew it was just my parents. It didn’t bother me - I’m not sure why I never believed! I have three older siblings but they never spoiled it for me. It didn’t really matter because I just saw those things like the letters from Santa and the tooth fairy as lovely things my mum and dad would do.

Take it as a blessing. No sodding elf or tiptoeing around at midnight with a stocking which you have to hide behind your back when they are still awake.

She’s intelligent. What a clever girl!
you are blessed to have such a wise child.

I had the Santa racket fully sussed by Christmas in P1 (just turned 5) and so did my daughter. She actually shouted ‘that not Santa he wearin trainers that a MMMMMANNNN’ at 2s group (she’d just turned 3) so that was great 😬. I don’t think it’s necessarily a sign of anything other than that your DD is switched on and all about the facts. And that we really notice shoes? I am laughing at the Home Alone one, that’s smart. I was also super-imaginative and really bought into films and stuff but I was always aware it wasn’t real.

I was this child and one of my own is too!

We rumbled the tooth and Santa way too early, asked about death in detail from about toddler age (none of this “in the sky” business) and queried why there wasn’t a world king. We went to see a posh Santa and while an older sibling was slightly freaked out, the cynic was all “it’s a man with a false beard!”. She was all of 3/4.

She has a high EQ which I think is linked, could read the room from an early age - like sensing the teacher was unhappy - and found that confusing as a child when she’d be thinking about the big picture while other kids were oblivious.

I had a vivid imaginary life as a child, loads of imaginary friends and made up stories etc with them. (To myself, didnt involve other people)
While I technically did believe in father Christmas we weren't a family that really talked about it other than that the stocking was from FC, there was no 'magic of Christmas or putting out fake footprints so it was more that I didn't really give a lot of thought to if the idea was true rather than adamantly 'believed'. I certainly wasn't lying awake listing for sleighbells and it didn't damage my enjoyment of Christmas. And if I had asked I am confident they would have told me. My family might have been influenced as my older sister had to be told it was made up at 3 when she had utter hysterics at the idea of a strange man creeping into her room at night. Can't say it seemed to hurt her enjoyment of stocking presents at all!

Is she an Aquarius 🤣
What a sweet girl. Bless her.

Does the all seeing all knowing 'god' in the sky, fool her too or not?

I didn’t grow up with Santa (not Christian, grew up in Asia). I knew of it as a concept that Western kids believe in. Didn’t have a tooth fairy or Easter bunny. We have plenty of festivals all involving mythology of some nature but many of these stories are gruesome. Still had a pretty great childhood as did most of my friends. When I looked at idols of the Hindu god Durga I didn’t actually think she was in it (also because there was another one in the next lane) but I enjoyed the food, the presents, the holiday spirit.

For Christmas we had carols in school and a nativity play (Christian school) but obviously no Christmas presents. It was just a holiday. I love Christmas songs and movies and did even as a child without ever seeing snow or believing in Santa.

It’s a very narrow view of what makes a magical childhood. And your daughter sounds hugely intelligent. I’d really be cherishing that.

My SS is like this (just turned 7, but been like this since around 4).
If watching a film he'll just say 'it's not real though'.
Always pointed out that the Santa we visited wasn't the real one because of his beard or some other false aspect. We just told him it's because Santa needs helpers to make sure every child can see him.

He does struggle with imagination in play though, tends to role play real life situations or do things like Lego and hot wheels that are more actual.
We've encouraged him to make up stories with us at bedtime to keep him creative. He does love doing that.

She can still have great Christmases without believing in FC. It would be very sad if people only enjoyed Christmas as long as they believed.

I would ask your dd what she enjoys about Christmases and focus on those sorts of things. For example if she’s about sensory things like lights and baubles then involve her in decorating. If she’s about crafts then get some ideas for 1 December. I know some households where siblings who know The Truth are allowed to set up Elf on the Shelf. If she’s about the good, do a blind test of mince pies or whatever from different shops and film her comments like a YouTube video.

I have young adult kids and even when they were cynical teens, they would get sentimental and happy with stuff like unpacking the Christmas baubles or when I’d buy “Christmas food” like tins of Quality Street. They weren’t all gushing normally but Christmas seemed to brings some oooo and ahhhhs that was very sweet.

My son figured it out at 6 as well, I was disappointed because I remember thinking it was probably the last year it would be magicalto him, and then he told me he knew it was me. He likes helping make it fun for his younger siblings though

Yes, and girls often go un-notived as they can learn how to mask the signs.

She is not you. She is her own person - and her 'best bits of childhood' will not be the same as yours.

That doesn't mean they won't be as good, or that she's missing out. There is at least as much 'magic' in intellectual curiosity and figuring out how the world really works as there is in following other people's stories. And, unlike believing in Father Christmas, that magic lasts for life - and you can even make a good living from it if you wish to.

Try to meet her where she is, rather than pushing her to where you were.

She thinks like myself and my children. We are autistic. I only found out a few years ago some children think the characters at Disney are real! Or the people who dress up as FC. That blows my mind! I could even say it seems a bit sad that they are so easily fooled!