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AIBU?

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Sister being a bitch because I have the flu

95 replies

RedPineapplePanda · 26/11/2024 13:05

I normally pick my nephews up from school a couple of times a week. Until recently I had a car and would get them then take them back home (too far for me to walk and crossing a busy duel carriageway)

Had to scrap my car and have occasionally walked to the school to get them - it's about a two mile round trip.

I came down the the flu (actual flu, not a cold - popped on a flu/Covid test) on Sat and have been feeling absolutely awful since. I've barely been out of bed!

She's was awful to me yesterday because I couldn't get them and has been nasty today too. Basically she thinks I'm putting on being ill or being soft/dramatic because she's had a cold and has still been going to work. I also have a chronic illness that makes me feel unwell so the flu on top has just made everything ten times worse.

Our mom is giving me a lift to the school tonight but aibu to tell sister to pack the attitude in?

OP posts:
Lindjam · 26/11/2024 14:05

If you have flu, why isn’t your mother doing the childcare for your sister? Given that she’s driving you to the school anyway…

I would have just said that I was unable to help. You need to stand up to her or she will continue to bully you.

kiwiane · 26/11/2024 14:05

It’s for the parents to sort out childcare - I’d use this as a cue to stop picking them up altogether. Your sister needs to pay a childminder and may be able to claim part of the cost via universal credit.

RhubarbAndFlustered · 26/11/2024 14:01

HoppityBun · 26/11/2024 13:56

When I’ve had flu I’ve been too ill to frig around on social media

I wasn't. I couldn't walk to the bathroom without help. I collapsed in the pouring icy rain, on my hands and knees in a torrent of freezing water rushing down the alleyway. But when I'd been rescued and had a sleep, I was in bed on FB and browsing Mumsnet. Confirmed influenza type A, still feeling like shit but I could use my eyes and thumbs.

HoppityBun · 26/11/2024 13:56

When I’ve had flu I’ve been too ill to frig around on social media

Seashellssanctuary · 26/11/2024 13:56

NABG - which is bang out of order

Delatron · 26/11/2024 13:56

I’m wondering if your mother is complicit in all this? She should be telling you to rest not taking you to get the kids!

PinkFrogss · 26/11/2024 13:53

Having your nephews this afternoon will help in the short term, but what happens when they get your flu and then when she probably gets it off them?

As others have said you’re being a mug, say no.

cleanasawhistle · 26/11/2024 13:53

Your sister is very rude.

I appreciate she is on probation at the moment but what happens if the kids are too ill for school ?
Would you be expected to step in ...and get the same abuse if you said you had plans

Anotherworrier · 26/11/2024 13:51

MumonabikeE5 · 26/11/2024 13:46

I didn’t suggest she walks now. My comment Was in response to her saying that since she had scrapped her car the 2mile round trip was too far to walk on a normal day.

obviously her sister is -as I said - bang out of order

It is for someone else’s kids. This is so funny. You’re saying she should go and pick someone’s else’s kids to get her (bullshit) NHS recommended steps in???? 😂😂😂😂 she could be a marathon runner for all you know!

gamerchick · 26/11/2024 13:50

Jesus OP, why are you going to the school. If your mother's taking you then she can pick up.

Your only response to this specimen is "sort your own childcare out in future, you ungrateful cow'

Feel better.

Delatron · 26/11/2024 13:48

MumonabikeE5 · 26/11/2024 13:46

I didn’t suggest she walks now. My comment Was in response to her saying that since she had scrapped her car the 2mile round trip was too far to walk on a normal day.

obviously her sister is -as I said - bang out of order

It’s irrelevant though. I skimmed over that bit because OP does not have to feel obliged to be her sisters childcare twice a week. Whether that be a 5 minutewalk or an hours walks

Frozensnow · 26/11/2024 13:48

You’re being a bit of a mug op. Don’t look after some one else’s kids when you’re this poorly.

thepariscrimefiles · 26/11/2024 13:46

RedPineapplePanda · 26/11/2024 13:31

She doesn't finish work until 6pm and has been told she can't take any more time off because she's missed a lot due to various things (kids being sick, her being sick, our dad being in hospital)

She's still on probation so can't risk losing the job .

Is your sister separated from her children's father? Is that why he is refusing to help?

Does the children's school have an after-school club that they could go to? I understand that your sister's position is difficult, but you are doing her a massive favour collecting her children, so she is completely out of order with her behaviour towards you.

MumonabikeE5 · 26/11/2024 13:46

Anywherebuthere · 26/11/2024 13:40

Not when she is so ill. She should be resting not building up her steps!

I didn’t suggest she walks now. My comment Was in response to her saying that since she had scrapped her car the 2mile round trip was too far to walk on a normal day.

obviously her sister is -as I said - bang out of order

MounjaroUser · 26/11/2024 13:45

Barrenfieldoffucks · 26/11/2024 13:12

Way to miss the point 😂

Did you read that the OP has flu?

TomatoSandwiches · 26/11/2024 13:43

Frankly op this isn't your problem, it was very very kind of you to help out originally but obviously your sister has come to feel entitled to it, best to tell her you won't e doing it anymore at all under any circumstances.

Perhaps she'll be more appreciative to the next mug she ropes in for free childcare or she can pay it herself.

MumonabikeE5 · 26/11/2024 13:42

RhaenysRocks · 26/11/2024 13:38

did you read the bit about her being really ill?

Which is why I think it is “bang out of order” for her sister to be demanding she picks up the kids.

totally ridiculous .

and frankly I wouldn’t help again if my sibling was so unreasonable when I was unwell.

but when she is well a 2 mile round trip doesn’t require a car.

Anotherworrier · 26/11/2024 13:41

RedPineapplePanda · 26/11/2024 13:31

She doesn't finish work until 6pm and has been told she can't take any more time off because she's missed a lot due to various things (kids being sick, her being sick, our dad being in hospital)

She's still on probation so can't risk losing the job .

IT’S NOT YOUR PROBLEM.

say that again!

Anywherebuthere · 26/11/2024 13:40

MumonabikeE5 · 26/11/2024 13:11

well your sister is bang out of order to expecting you to collect kids when you are so ill.

(but 1 mile each way is a tiny walk.
you are supposed to aim for 10000 steps a day and 2 miles is about 4000. Less than half of a basic amount for health. )

Not when she is so ill. She should be resting not building up her steps!

Clarice99 · 26/11/2024 13:40

She's still on probation so can't risk losing the job .

So she'd rather expose her children to flu, risk getting it herself via her children and then take time off sick?

Anotherworrier · 26/11/2024 13:40

RedPineapplePanda · 26/11/2024 13:30

Unfortunately short of leaving them at school until sis finishes at 6pm I don't have a choice because Mom has a hospital appointment at 4:30, sister can't leave work early, and their dad has absolutely refused to help.

Oh for God sake but you do have a choice.

Just say no, if my sister spoke to me like that it would be the absolute end. In fact, I would have told her I can’t when I stopped driving.

She’s treating you like a mug because you’re letting her.

Anywherebuthere · 26/11/2024 13:38

Rest as much as you need to and tell her to look after her own children. Especially while you're I'll.

I bet she'l blame you if they get ill too.

RhaenysRocks · 26/11/2024 13:38

MumonabikeE5 · 26/11/2024 13:11

well your sister is bang out of order to expecting you to collect kids when you are so ill.

(but 1 mile each way is a tiny walk.
you are supposed to aim for 10000 steps a day and 2 miles is about 4000. Less than half of a basic amount for health. )

did you read the bit about her being really ill?

Crumpleton · 26/11/2024 13:37

You're sister isn't being a bitch because you have the flu.

She's being a bitch because she is one, it's just that while you're running around after her and her life is tickety boo you don't notice it, when you're not available and she has to think for herself she shows who she really is.

Clarice99 · 26/11/2024 13:37

YourWildAmberSloth · 26/11/2024 13:30

You are being unreasonable for allowing her to treat you like crap. Getting your mum to drive you to collect them is just plain stupid. Lots of kids stay at school until late, that's why they have wrap around care, or your sister needs to find a viable sustainable alternative - pay for childcare, change of job or hours. What happens the next time you are sick or unable to help. You're being a mug.

Edited

I agree with this post.

OP, you're not responsible for your sister's child care arrangements whether you have flu or not.

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