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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be annoyed at my neighbour?

279 replies

PeachHog · 26/11/2024 11:48

Moved into a lovely semi detached, private rented, 18 months ago. Have 2 kids 7 and 10, it's fair to say that we've not been the quietest family. Like many we argue most days, kids play loudly, and we probably haven't been as aware of noise as we should have been. There's a single mother next door with a teenage daughter. DH put a dartboard up on adjoing wall a few weeks ago, however he didnt realise it would be heard by next door until we could hear her turn the music up whenever he was throwing darts.

However, this is what annoyed me - instead of coming to talk to us, she's went directly to the landlord to complain about the unreasonable level of noise and the dartboard! Landlord's now annoyed we didn't agree this with him first (we should have) and now im terrified we're at risk of losing our home. Aibu to think that even though we were in the wrong, she should have come to us first instead of going directly to the landlord? I had no idea she even knew him.

OP posts:
Ihopeithinkiknow · 26/11/2024 13:19

Not the point of the thread but it sounds like he is shit at darts if they can hear darts clattering off the walls lol

Anotherdayanotherbattle · 26/11/2024 13:14

@PeachHog think I'm the only 1. But I would have knocked and asked if you could move the dart board to a different wall . Or stuck a note though the door

lightsandtunnels · 26/11/2024 13:14

You cannot possibly not have realised that throwing darts onto a board against a wall would not be heard on the other side. It's also not normal to argue and make a lot of noise on a daily basis.
You're sounding rather self centred in all this OP.
If you neighbour is a single Mum as you have said, I would imagine she feels vulnerable living next door to such a noisy family so probably felt too worried or frightened to approach you. How friendly have you been to her? Have you made an effort to chat or pass the time of day with her?
We all need to be aware of our neighbours and be mindful of noise and show respect.
Everyone on here is saying pretty much the same thing OP so I hope you're listening and taking it all on board so you can move on and keep your lovely house and not upset your neighbour any more.

FuckoffeeBeforeCoffee · 26/11/2024 13:12

Bloody reverse.

Aldi99pTofu · 26/11/2024 13:10

@username2373 HM Land Registry you can look at the deeds for the property for a few pounds. That should show you the owner/landlord’s name and address. Some councils require landlords to be registered with them as well so you might be able to find out that way. Or go via the letting agent if there is one.

Anon1274 · 26/11/2024 13:07

BibbityBobbityToo · 26/11/2024 13:00

This must be a reverse, OP you did the right thing complaining directly to the landlord. Your noisy neighbours sound like a right bunch of agressive scruffs.

There’s no way this isn’t a reverse. Completely out of order on every level 😂

Nolegusta · 26/11/2024 13:04

Reverse?
If not then YABVU. Who throws darts against an adjoining wall? 😧

Scirocco · 26/11/2024 13:04

You sound like awful neighbours. You need to develop communication skills and the ability to consider the needs of others. Who on earth puts up a dartboard on an adjoining wall to the neighbour who already has to put up with your excessive noise?

GinaDreamsofRunningAway · 26/11/2024 13:02

Who puts a dartboard up in a rented house without permission from the landlord? And also, who puts one up on a wall being shared with the next door neighbours? That is so obvious that its going to constantly 'thud thud thud' over and over again on the wall!!! Sounds like you have been really inconsiderate of your neighbours.

Also, no, we don't argue most days. I'm not surprised that they have complained about the noise and not come straight to you. Especially if you argue everyday. You sound unapproachable and you sound a nightmare to live next door to.

chocolatemademefat · 26/11/2024 13:01

Your poor neighbors! Listening to arguments and screaming children every day - would you like that. And putting up a dartboard in someone else’s property is pure cheek. Or were you intending to replaster the wall you would no doubt damage.

Have more consideration for other people.

BibbityBobbityToo · 26/11/2024 13:00

This must be a reverse, OP you did the right thing complaining directly to the landlord. Your noisy neighbours sound like a right bunch of agressive scruffs.

Cestfoutu · 26/11/2024 12:59

If you think EastEnders is a documentary rather than a soap opera, then perhaps it's reasonable to believe you live a normal life. But it isn't.

TheDogBartholomew · 26/11/2024 12:58

Your neighbour didn't want to speak directly to you because you are the neighbours from hell.

88MincePies · 26/11/2024 12:58

Be honest, if she came to you and told you to stop shouting so much and to take down that dartboard, what would your reply be? You would have told her there's nothing you can do about the shouting and it's unlikely you would have taken down the dartboard (given you didn't have the consideration not to put it up in the first place). It would have been pointless and also put herself in the line of fire.

LifeInAHamsterWheel · 26/11/2024 12:57

She's a single mother living on her own, I can see why she didn't want to approach the man next door who she doesn't know, to complain about the amount of noise he's making!

Nanny0gg · 26/11/2024 12:57

Seriously?

You're THIS tone-deaf?

lizzyBennet08 · 26/11/2024 12:55

Honestly absolutely your home is at risk. Arguing, dart boards etc . What on earth were you thinking.
Good landlords are considerate of the neighbours and clearly they have a relationship there. Consider yourself warned and change your behaviour or he absolutely will evict you. Being annoyed by your neighbours for complaining to him is a bit rich of a dartboard family.

Ihatelittlefriendsusan · 26/11/2024 12:54

Sorry but as a former single mum with neighbours who fight like cat and dog daily I wouldn't have approached you either.

My neighbours own (as do i) but I have been known to send my best mate over who is an ex world strongest man competitor to have a word when things got too out of hand.

You only have yourselves to blame if your landlord evicts you unfortunately.

Hopefully now you know, you can drop a card and some flowers round by way of an apology. Explain you didn't realise you could be heard and stop arguing etc!!

luckylavender · 26/11/2024 12:54

Noisy and entitled. I wouldn't have approached you either.

Startinganew32 · 26/11/2024 12:52

You sound like something from Shameless. And I wouldn’t want to go and confront Mr Darts player who’s probably a heavy drinker either if I was a single mum living with my daughter.

DottieMoon · 26/11/2024 12:51

You are completely unreasonable. Your neighbour should not have been put in a position where she has to co front you. She has no idea what sort of people you are.

You have no consideration at all, not even now. Stop being so selfish.

username2373 · 26/11/2024 12:50

Without derailing, how does one know who is the landlord and how to contact them?
We've got similar issues..

Flutterbees · 26/11/2024 12:50

I think you know who is being unreasonable OP, and it's not your neighbours...

TallulahBetty · 26/11/2024 12:49

You sound like nightmare neighbours. HTH.

stanleypops66 · 26/11/2024 12:49

If I were a single parent I'd have probably gone to the landlord. If you're a shouty household who had regular arguments (not normal) then I might be quite afraid of your reactions.

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