To remind you of this, when you argue with neighbours over parking spaces.

I luckily live in an area where 2 years ago they started ticketing people who park across someone else's drive. They then can come and tow it later if they are contacted.

It does however mean you or any of your guests can't park across your own drive.

I saw a blue badge owner arguing with one of the parking attendants over it as he had parked across some friends' drives for years when he visited them. He had to go and park else where that time. Afterwards they simply moved one of their cars out so he could park on their drive.

ah yes, try and scare people from standing up for themselves. I have 2 allocated parking spaces in a small council block of flats, but because the studio flats opposite only have 1 space each but most have work vans and personal cars - they park in my allocated spaces. I’m disabled and have an autistic child, shall I just let them park in both spaces and have to walk 5 minutes to my home instead of 10 steps from the door. I will continue to stand up for myself thanks

https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.bbc.com/news/uk-wales-north-west-wales-21246463.amp

This is another ex soldier who stabbed two of his neighbours. The debates needs to be about suitable screening of recruits going into the military and ongoing support for mental health during and after service, rather than not having adult discussions with your neighbours out of fear of an unlikely violent catastrophe.

The point is that you can't extrapolate one person's behaviour (the murderous neighbour/axe wielding sex pest) to the wider population (all neighbours/all men in street).

There are weirdos everywhere and these people were extremely unfortunate. What a desperately sad situation.

(It's 'you're', not 'your' OP. Sorry, but this drives me absolutely crazy.)

You could get stabbed/ shot by some randomer at any point, at dinner, at a concert, on the train, walking along the street, doing absolutely nothing. You’re also far more likely to get run over, be in a car crash, get ill etc. This is just scaremongering for the sake of it.

But Dotty, you started out by saying that "you never know who you are dealing with" and it was pretty clear that you meant dont' challenge people or ever get into confrontations in acse you land up dead.

So I agree with @TheLimeHedgehog - what's the difference between that and a woman walking alone? We all know that women walking alone run the risk of being attacked. And it's certainly a significantly bigger risk than a neighbour stabbing you over a parking space.

Ditto, letting children out to play. There are real and measurable risks. A 12 year old girl near us was killed by a falling tree branch while going through some woods with friends. It was devastating. Should I tell DS that he can never go through woods again?

You seem to have a fundemental risk assessment problem here. Eliminating risk 100% by never ever doing something may be effective, but it's not practical. And in many many cases, it's not necessary.

Well said

Personally I think YANBU. My neighbour seemed ok until there was a dispute (which I’ve bored people about under a previous user name) I’ve never seen such anger and rage from him. I was absolutely terrified of what he was going to do and, judging by the shouting and swearing we were constantly hearing from next door, I think I was right to be worried. So glad we moved shortly afterwards.

This is stupid. I unfortunately live in an area where selfish entitled people park in front of my driveway every week. Sometimes they block me in, sometimes they park across it when I’m out. My neighbours change on a regular basis and every time I have to go through the same process of explaining to them that you are not supposed to block drives (especially when you have your own driveway). After a couple of occasions they usually get it and we are fine. If I don’t say anything they will just merrily carry on and I will suffer in silence. Why do they get to use my driveway ? I refuse to give in out of fear.

The other scenario is that random people will do the same. If I manage to catch them when they get back I will always challenge them. Sometimes they tell me to fuck off but they won’t usually do it again. People count on you just accepting their selfish acts.

I gave an example up thread, it was even a parking one.

We have had to have multiple engagements with our neighbours on things and it's never got contentious. We are polite normal people. So are our neighbours.

One logical extension of OP's post is that women shouldn't walk down the street because they might provoke an axe wielding sex pest. I prefer to assume that most people are rational adults rather than live a half life in fear.

So lots of MN posters have been murdered have they?

Can I also just point out that even if your concern is about general bad vibes between neighbours, that is often about HOW people engage with each other. We had a parking dispute. Neighbour told us not to park there. We said it was our spot. They said it wasn't. We looked it up. Turned out, embarssingly, neighbour was right. We apologised. We stopped parking there and had to have a similar conversation with the person who, it turned out, was parking in our space. Job done.

I do agree with, 'Don't start a fight when you don't know the type of person you're dealing with'. I would hope you could judge how risky starting (or continuing) a vendetta with a neighbour was, but I'm amazed how many people are willing to get into road rage knowing nothing about the people in the other car, or if they will get out of their car mob handed or with a tyre iron or a knife in their hand.

Equally by being a doormat and showing how weak willed you are and viewed as an easy target will likely get you fixed firmly in their sights for extended abuse and potential harm.

Let's all act like weak silly little women, and put up with whatever shit our neighbors do.

Well actually, I would be hugely surprised if it escalates massively. Even more so if it lands up in someone knifing someone. Becuase those are NOT normal responses to someone challenging someone, or normal arguments.

It' slike saying all teenagers sould never be allowed out becuase 1 teenager was killed.

Bloody daft post.

You don't know who your dealing with when you argue.

So all the neighbours who have threaten children with their behaviour should be allowed to get away with it?

So amongst other things you are saying it is fine for a toddler to be beaten up? A young teen to be raped?

Get a grip. Never challenge anyone in life just in case.

You don't know who your dealing with when you argue.

So you can nevre challenge anyone, over anything?

Argh, ridiculous