AIBU for not wanting to pay rent?

Aside from the fact it's not for you to decide what's a fair rent. I mean what's fair to them. Both OP and her sister seem to feel resentful of the situation. I get the impression they both think it's unfair and they are giving a lot of- the sister giving the accommodation and she thinks OP should pay more and the OP is doing a lot in terms of gifting, paying for meals and helping in other ways.

OP should ask sister what she wants her to pay and then OP can either pay it if she thinks it's reasonable and not do all the other stuff as she's paying a "fair" rent (as in what sister asked for or if it's too much then OP needs to make other arrangements.

Not much to say eh.

You haven’t got much imagination then.

You need to charge for the dog sitting. Pay rent while you're away and move out ASAP. Don't be available for loads of baby sitting or paying for treats unless you really want to.

Of course he's getting a good deal. He's getting OP out of his house for a month with full rent paid, he's painted himself as a knight in shining armour to his parents for coming to the rescue, and he's dressed it all up to OP as doing HER a favour.

Not only will OP have to pay rent she's being asked to pay for expenses at the dog sitting house that she likely won't get back, because her sister has previously told her her PIL do not reimburse costs.

I can only imagine you are similar to BIL to be defending this behaviour.

They are using you to subsidise their household. Do not pay anything to them whilst you are house sitting elsewhere. And I would move out ASAP & once you have moved out, do not fall for any sob stories and give them any money. Good luck in finding your own place.

I’ve a suggestion OP. Ask the CF’s who are BiL’s parents to pay for your room while you house/dog sit. You’re saving them a lot more than that, trust me.

But by proposing £50 per week rather than £100, OP was broadly doing this, and DSis wasn't happy.

Sadly I think you should have agreed the terms of the house and dog sitting before you agreed to do it, even if it wasn't at your instigation.
It's reasonable to reduce your contribution to account for the food/heating you won't be using, but they're clearly now relying on your money and until you have an alternative you're relying on them for accommodation, so for the sake of good relations (and given you're reasonably well paid by your own admission) then I suggest you pay up.

They shouldn’t be relying on the extra money, or everything else that OP contributes to. If OP were renting a room from a landlord she wouldn’t be spending on any extras the way she is now. And if BiL was the one who volunteered her for the house sitting job, then he should have agreed terms with her first, instead of assuming she would still pay for her room - which it seems her sister will now be using for her friend to stay in while OP is away. If OP is living somewhere else doing his family a free favour (and saving them a lot of money in the process) then they shouldn’t be expecting her to still be paying for the room as she’s not incurring any household costs. It’s massively unreasonable, as is increasing the rent by 50% on her return. That’s £600 a month. No way would lodging in a private house with a live in landlord cost her that much. I’d follow through and move out.

She is paying them a fair rent. £100 a week for a room in a private house with a live in landlord, is actually slightly above what’s asked in our area - around £300-£350 a month here, depending on the amenities. Add in all the extras and she’s likely paying double that. She’s been asked to pay £100 a week while house/dog sitting even though she won’t be living there, won’t be incurring any extra expenses and her sister wouldn’t otherwise rent out the room - and to top it off, her sister will be having a friend to stay in the room OP is renting. She’s also been asked to pay £150 a week when she returns which is well over what it costs to rent a room in a private house. And yes, her BiL is her sisters’ husband, who volunteered her for the house sitting job - she’s also expected to pay all vet bills for the dog until the owners return, so I think it’s fairly obvious that she’s being massively taken advantage of by everyone involved.

It’s £100 a week, not a month,

And yes, OP has been volunteered by her BIL, who she is living with, to help his parents

Well, you certainly have plenty of “personality”, don’t you? Although that’s not quite the word I’d use…

There’s nothing judgemental about telling someone they need to speak up for themselves. OP came here for advice - that’s mine. If she just wants to hear, “Awwh, your sister is a big old meanie 😢” with no practical suggestions, there are plenty of people on the thread who have trotted that out.

Wait is the BIL your sisters husband who you are staying with?

OP if you do continue staying there you need to ask what they would be happy for you to pay then decide if you want to stay and then you don't need to do all the favours and gifts because you'll be paying them a fair rent

If you can find somewhere else then do

They're doing you a favour in putting you up and if you earn more than them both combined I can understand why they'd resent paying all the bills and you living for free. If you agreed to pay them £100 a month for a year then they've probably budgeted for that and it's not fair to change this because you've decided to go and do something else. Your issues with your BIL and housesitting is for you to sort out and y
not your sister's problem.

Considering her friend is going to be staying in the room you would be paying for, I wouldn't give her any money at all. Especially when she does not have any extra costs for you living there, as you're not even there. I would NEVER expect my siblings to pay for board, when they're not even there!!

Not everybody has the same personality as you, love. Reel it in because your judgemental attitude stinks.

You sound a very nice person and even better aunty and sister. Better than your own sister who is grabby and a cheeky F*.

good luck move out move on and stop letting your sister abuse you. She is being controlling and manipulative. I am not sure why you even want to rebuild your relationship when it is so one sided.

Just my opinion, but if they can afford to go on holiday for 2 weeks in January, then their more financially better off then most young families today. I think it's unreasonable for them to ask you to pay if your not there! Start to learn to say NO or people will take your kindness for granted all your life.

No one needs free takeaways and Uber taxis when they have a car. Sis and bio are taking the piss.

It’s not only money! Op is being asked to move her hours at work to do (unpaid) childcare etc

It’s only money. Not mine I know but obviously your sister needs the money. If you can afford it, pay it. Surely you want your sister to not have to struggle any more than necessary. Save your money and move when you find the ideal location.

Definitely move out. Insist your sister’s pil reimburse you for the dog related expenses. Did they not pay the vet in advance for scheduled jabs? Did they leave enough food for 2 months? Massive piss takers. Can’t you move out sooner, your sister could look after her pil’s dog! I’m angry for you, but you were silly to agree to the house sitting situation.

I think you are being very unfairly treated.

Never tell anyone what you earn. It always rebounds on you and often causes envy.

£50 a week is plenty for when you are absent from the house.