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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To ask if people today don’t agree with ivf?!

817 replies

Yaerry · 25/11/2024 15:44

or am I just naive? Watched the new documentary about Jean Purdy and I’m surprised there was so much push back at the time. It’s made me wonder if one day surrogacy will be more accepted? I thought ivf was just a standard thing now that wasn’t controversial.

OP posts:
CaptainCabinetsTrappedInCabinets · 25/11/2024 17:52

SemperIdem · 25/11/2024 17:51

Not dying of heart failure isn’t a right either but organ donation doesn’t seem to get the flack fertility treatment does.

A baby is not essential for life. Organ donation is.

sprigatito · 25/11/2024 17:52

PadstowGirl · 25/11/2024 17:48

My ethical issues with IVF are around the fact that some people working in the industry have made a fortune from other people's misery.
And yet they are treated like heros.

Is it fair to say they're profiting from human misery? They're profiting as much from alleviating misery and helping create families, surely? I'd say profiting purely from human misery would be someone who manufactures gallows, or writes scripts for Keith Lemon.

That said, I am opposed to private healthcare (and education, and transport) personally. The two purposes - maximising profits and providing the best service - always end up being in conflict, and there's only ever one winner.

Juno86 · 25/11/2024 17:52

Moglet4 · 25/11/2024 17:42

I really admire women who volunteer to be surrogates for sisters, best friends etc. That’s because I know I couldn’t do it myself; I absolutely know I’d become attached to the child and consider myself its mother. Kudos to those who can do it though.

Kudos nothing.

The baby has no option in this shitshow.

Kudos indeed to the women who deliberately choose to engage in a process which rips a newborn away from the only person it knows. You wouldn’t do that to a puppy.

pinksheetss · 25/11/2024 17:51

Pollyanna87 · 25/11/2024 17:49

I’m against IVF because I believe that humans have the right to be made the human way.

Is it not humans creating IVF then? Was always under the impression my fertility doctor was a human but huh I must have been wrong

OchonAgusOchonOh · 25/11/2024 17:51

I have no issues with IVF when the mother's egg is used. I have serious concerns about the use of donor eggs. There are commercial companies who sell the idea of donating eggs as being an easy way to make some quick money. They do not give adequate information on the risks to the donor. I read an article on a woman who nearly died from Ovarian Hyperstimulation Syndrome (OHSS)
and the company she was selling the eggs to were useless. There is also next to no research on long-term effects of egg donation, something the companies gloss over by stating there is no evidence of long-term effects.

Interesting article here - www.statnews.com/2017/01/28/egg-donors-risks/

Wellingtonspie · 25/11/2024 17:51

I don’t agree with the buying or selling of someone’s body or its parts.

SemperIdem · 25/11/2024 17:51

CaptainCabinetsTrappedInCabinets · 25/11/2024 17:49

Controversial, but I think if theres people not being able to get or get others pregnant. We should'nt force this either with IVF or surrogacy.

Having a baby is not a right.

The same way I believe people who have many disabled children (knowing theirs a high possibility of issues) are wrong.

Not dying of heart failure isn’t a right either but organ donation doesn’t seem to get the flack fertility treatment does.

BoobyDazzler · 25/11/2024 17:50

I think ivf is a wonderful thing but I'm
bit sure it should be funded by the NHS. I’m also not entirely sure that encouraging woman to part with their eggs to get cheaper treatment is entirely ethical.

Lemonadeand · 25/11/2024 17:50

category12 · 25/11/2024 17:45

One difference is you definitely know you have a viable embryo in the one case, and you don't in the other. You're just preventing a possibly fertilised egg from implanting, and it may not even have been fertilised with MAP.

Yes, that’s true.

helpfulperson · 25/11/2024 17:49

I do wonder if the increase in youngsters with SEN could be in part due to the rise in various fertility treatments. We just don't know what longer term effects could be.

Pollyanna87 · 25/11/2024 17:49

I’m against IVF because I believe that humans have the right to be made the human way.

CaptainCabinetsTrappedInCabinets · 25/11/2024 17:49

Controversial, but I think if theres people not being able to get or get others pregnant. We should'nt force this either with IVF or surrogacy.

Having a baby is not a right.

The same way I believe people who have many disabled children (knowing theirs a high possibility of issues) are wrong.

ByGentleFatball · 25/11/2024 17:48

EvilsElsasPetSnowman · 25/11/2024 17:44

Have I missed something - why does anyone care if an embryo was destroyed? What else should have happened to them if they’re not needed?

I think they should be used for various scientific tests

PadstowGirl · 25/11/2024 17:48

My ethical issues with IVF are around the fact that some people working in the industry have made a fortune from other people's misery.
And yet they are treated like heros.

pinksheetss · 25/11/2024 17:47

I don't think saying IVF isn't natural because it goes against population control is fair. The rise in infertility numbers shows how the chemicals and surroundings we are in affect human fertility.
I don't think nearly as many of those suffering with infertility now would have been the same back in the day.

CurlewKate · 25/11/2024 17:46

IVF is fine- although I know some anti choice---- pro life people who are opposed.

Surrogacy is a completely different thing- and I will never be able to support it.

CharismaticMegafauna · 25/11/2024 17:45

I don’t think my mum agreed with IVF but I am not sure if she was opposed to it being funded on the NHS or to the idea in principle. It wouldn’t have been to do with leftover embryos. She was also opposed to organ transplantation.

category12 · 25/11/2024 17:45

Lemonadeand · 25/11/2024 17:36

Is destroying a viable embryo any different from taking the morning after pill?

One difference is you definitely know you have a viable embryo in the one case, and you don't in the other. You're just preventing a possibly fertilised egg from implanting, and it may not even have been fertilised with MAP.

EvilsElsasPetSnowman · 25/11/2024 17:44

Have I missed something - why does anyone care if an embryo was destroyed? What else should have happened to them if they’re not needed?

FeralWoman · 25/11/2024 17:43

Snugglemonkey · 25/11/2024 17:35

Many people do have left over embryos. I have had 8 cycles of ivf and have mostly used all embryos, but we do have 2 frozen. Would either actually become a baby? Who knows. I have produced many embryos, lots a better grade than those two even, but I have only two children.

So you produced many embryos with two children and two frozen embryos - what happened to the rest of them? Were they healthy viable embryos that you agreed to dispose of? Did they not progress in their development? Did you have genetic testing done and chose to discard them based on results? Did you spin a wheel and pour the losers down the sink for shits and giggles?

This thing about the destruction of embryos needs some context. There’s a difference between embryos that were never going to make it to being born, and those that are chosen to be discarded at the end of treatment. Only those discarded at the end of treatment are ones that I’d personally regard as destroyed because of IVF. Then again they only existed because of IVF.

Moglet4 · 25/11/2024 17:42

tachetastic · 25/11/2024 17:10

It is unconscionable to remove a newborn infant from its biological mother (unless said mother is incapable of providing a safe and loving home).

If by biological mother you mean the woman who provided the egg and is genetically related to the child, then in many, if not most, cases of surrogacy the birth mother is not the biological mother of the child. She carries a child that she is not related to. Even in surrogacy for gay couples, the egg donor and the birth mother are different people.

I know several women who having carried multiple children of their own have volunteered to carry a child for someone else, who have been unable to carry a baby to term themselves. None of them considered they were giving up their own baby.

I know the law in many countries treats the birth mother as the legal mother even if she is not genetically linked, but I wanted to point behind the biology to be clear.

I really admire women who volunteer to be surrogates for sisters, best friends etc. That’s because I know I couldn’t do it myself; I absolutely know I’d become attached to the child and consider myself its mother. Kudos to those who can do it though.

user6476897654 · 25/11/2024 17:41

I’ve no objection to IVF, although it wouldn't have been something I’d have considered if we’d had trouble conceiving. I know plenty of very happy childfree people!

I’m not sure about the NHS paying for it though, when it’s practically collapsing at the roots.

Lollypop25 · 25/11/2024 17:40

Mebebecat · 25/11/2024 16:24

Over three quarters of embryos are destroyed I believe.

You believe? Or you know? Can you share a source or are you confidently spreading misinformation without fear of consequence?

Combattingthemoaners · 25/11/2024 17:40

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

It isn’t factual.

EvilsElsasPetSnowman · 25/11/2024 17:39

Mumtobabyhavoc · 25/11/2024 17:35

This.
And sometimes innocent little I was just curious OP's are goady af with an agenda. 🧐

Also @nosmartphone has a SEN child.

What did YOU do to make your child have something “wrong” with them @nosmartphone??